NSFW News That Makes You Laugh/Cry/Hurl/etc.

Okay, what the fuck? I went to a reddit clickbait where they didn't explain how he died. I'm ashamed for being lured by deathporn, but also infuriated at your propagation of clickbait. Now I'm in mortal peril from I don't know what when dealing with woodchippers.

Thank ghost for handjob cabin. This thread is saved.

DSMatticus · Post by **DSMatticus** » Fri May 25, 2018 3:45 am

That highlighted post which currently reads "qwertyu" used to be an explanation. I do not know why he changed it. Maybe he learned something new which completely invalidated the original text. Maybe his boss found out, and he was told to shut his mouth. Maybe there's a pending lawsuit to which he or his employer or something is party, and he was told to shut his mouth. Maybe the company recognized their product in the image and sent him an angry cease and desist.

The gist of it, as I recall, is that woodchippers get jammed. Clearing a jammed woodchipper is a bitch. There is a panel you can open to access the chippery bit of the machine, but this triggers a safety lockout which prevents the woodchipper from running. The reasons for this should be obvious. Someone shorted this safety lockout so they could get easier access to the chippery bit without turning the machine off, because apparently there is an easier way to clear jams when you do this. Don't ask me what that is exactly.

As you can imagine, safety lockouts exist for your safety. The chippery bit of the machine caught a piece of the removed metal panel which housed it and ejected it. It struck the man's head. He died. I believe there was an imgur link to a piece of the metal panel lying across the street on the sidewalk. No visible gore, as I recall.

RobbyPants · Post by **RobbyPants** » Fri May 25, 2018 12:22 pm

DSMatticus wrote:That highlighted post which currently reads "qwertyu" used to be an explanation. I do not know why he changed it. Maybe he learned something new which completely invalidated the original text. Maybe his boss found out, and he was told to shut his mouth. Maybe there's a pending lawsuit to which he or his employer or something is party, and he was told to shut his mouth. Maybe the company recognized their product in the image and sent him an angry cease and desist.

The gist of it, as I recall, is that woodchippers get jammed. Clearing a jammed woodchipper is a bitch. There is a panel you can open to access the chippery bit of the machine, but this triggers a safety lockout which prevents the woodchipper from running. The reasons for this should be obvious. Someone shorted this safety lockout so they could get easier access to the chippery bit without turning the machine off, because apparently there is an easier way to clear jams when you do this. Don't ask me what that is exactly.

As you can imagine, safety lockouts exist for your safety. The chippery bit of the machine caught a piece of the removed metal panel which housed it and ejected it. It struck the man's head. He died. I believe there was an imgur link to a piece of the metal panel lying across the street on the sidewalk. No visible gore, as I recall.

That's what I saw, too. Just an otherwise unrecognizable piece of yellow metal.

Ancient History · Post by **Ancient History** » Tue Jun 12, 2018 1:21 am

The Case for Nudity

Count Arioch the 28th · Tue Jun 12, 2018 5:31 am

No one needs to see me naked.

Ancient History · Post by **Ancient History** » Sat Jul 07, 2018 12:03 am

http://www.iflscience.com/health-and-me ... his-penis/

erik · Post by **erik** » Sat Jul 07, 2018 1:00 am

I wonder if he had to flip the usb mulitple times before it finally went in.

Leress · Post by **Leress** » Sat Jul 07, 2018 5:14 pm

erik wrote:I wonder if he had to flip the usb mulitple times before it finally went in.

hyzmarca · Post by **hyzmarca** » Sat Jul 07, 2018 6:29 pm

Ancient History wrote:http://www.iflscience.com/health-and-me ... his-penis/

Been there, done that.

Ancient History · Post by **Ancient History** » Thu Aug 30, 2018 7:49 pm

https://www.blogto.com/city/2018/08/tor ... ura-dolls/

Count Arioch the 28th · Thu Aug 30, 2018 11:51 pm

That's a bit gross even by my standards. I think it's bullcrap it's getting shut down but that's not a service I would ever take advantage of.

Thaluikhain · Post by **Thaluikhain** » Fri Aug 31, 2018 2:19 pm

Er...find out if it's illegal before deciding to set up shop? Or make sure the locals won't deem it illegal.

deaddmwalking · Post by **deaddmwalking** » Fri Aug 31, 2018 3:02 pm

Thaluikhain wrote:Er...find out if it's illegal before deciding to set up shop? Or make sure the locals won't deem it illegal.

Despite 'not knowing the law' not being a defense, it's essentially impossible to know all potentially relevant laws. I don't live in Canada, but in the United States, every business is required to get a business permit. It's most likely that they were issued a business permit so they felt that they had adequately explained their business plan and the entity that issued the business permit didn't make them aware that 'adult stores' were prohibited. It is also possible that the definition of 'adult' in this case was not clear on what was excluded. They may have interpreted the rule to prohibit the sale of merchandise of a sexual nature (pornographic DVDs, magazines, sex toys) but since nothing is leaving the store, that wouldn't apply. If they felt they were a 'service business', the specific local zoning rules wouldn't apply.

It's also quite possible that the zoning rule that prohibits them from running their business is illegal. But they'd have to sue (which is expensive) to overturn it. It's probably easier to find a place that doesn't object as much.

Ancient History · Post by **Ancient History** » Sat Sep 01, 2018 4:50 pm

https://motherboard.vice.com/en_us/arti ... -lego-porn

Hicks · Post by **Hicks** » Mon Sep 03, 2018 11:14 pm

The Lego Group response on Lego Porn wrote:“Thanks for reaching out to us,” a spokesperson for Lego replied. “We have nothing to contribute with in this context as it is not related to us or our focus as a company in any way.”

Yeah. I actually lol'd there.

Hicks · Post by **Hicks** » Mon Sep 03, 2018 11:28 pm

[url=https://motherboard.vice.com/en_us/article/pawnwv/open-source-devs-reverse-decision-to-block-ice-contractors-from-using-software wrote:Motherboard [/url]]Crockford’s license modified MIT’s by including the phrase “the software shall be used for good, not evil.” Crockford licensed a variant of the programming language JavaScript, which was hosted by Google until 2009 when Google decided it violated the definition of free and open-source software.

It also raised serious legal issues at IBM, which interpreted the clause as a restriction on the freedom to use Crockford’s language in its products. So when IBM lawyers reached out to Crockford asking him to create a special license to use his programming language, he did just that. The license read: “I give permission for IBM, its customers, partners, and minions to use JSLint for evil.” According to Crockford, IBM’s lawyers were satisfied with this modification.

Stahlseele · Post by **Stahlseele** » Tue Sep 04, 2018 10:13 am

Uhm, why is this in NSFW? O.o

Prak · Post by **Prak** » Wed Sep 19, 2018 10:34 pm

So... the new Black Label imprint of DC meant for "mature" storytelling debuted today with Batman: Damned, issue #1.

And Batman's batcock is on shadowy, partial display. Turns out that in the canon, he's circumcised.

John Constantine is in the story as well, and honestly, personally, I'd rather see his dick.

Count Arioch the 28th · Wed Sep 19, 2018 11:57 pm

I'm a little disappointed, to be honest. I guess Batman's a grower not a show-er?