I need stupidly large numbers of party going npcs!

[radthemad4]

Matt Mathews is an amateur adventurer aiming to become famous. Disappointed with his somewhat limited success in this regard, he decided to use his recently acquired hat of disguise to start the Matt Mathews fan club with himself as the president and a few of the more zealous members using different, but consistent appearances. He's had some success getting people to join as his personas are amicable and entertaining enough folks in their own right. A few of his personas and possibly the president (not at the same time, but he might go to the bathroom and come back as someone else) would be at the party, praising Matt, trying to get people to join the club, and trying to get the partygoers talking about how awesome Matt is, before finally entering the party as himself.

[Koumei]

George Stout is a Glabrezu. That's not his real name, but he refuses to give his true name out, and people can't seem to pronounce his "given name". He was summoned and bound with the release condition of "until I say otherwise", and unfortunately the summoner died and nobody has got around to resurrecting him (or rather, nobody feels like it because he was a bit of a dick). George starts off surly and grumpy, but people can put him in a worse mood if they want. Improving his disposition is tricky, though he'd be most grateful to anybody that can:

• Cast Disjunction on him
• At least make life more fun for him by inviting (summoning) his best buddies, a trio of Vrocks, and plying them with booze. Note: they get happy when drunk. Note: they dance when they're happy. Note: everybody dies when they dance.

Bonus points: look through the monster books for the least human looking monster with a good Disguise bonus. You know what to do from there.

[rampaging-poet]

Inspired by Koumei's suggestion, Vorelisk is a juvenile brass dragon pretending to be a human man. His total Disguise modifier (including the -2 penalty for disguising oneself as a member of a different race) is +15, so only seasoned adventurers are able to penetrate his cunning disguise. Like most brass dragons, he is incredibly talkative. Once he gets monologuing it's difficult to wind him down. Experienced partygoers often deflect unwanted attention by introducing him to whoever's bothering them and escaping while they are distracted by the dragon's rambling.

Iojunah is a classically-trained doppleganger actor. It got its start playing multiple bit parts in each of several productions before graduating to professional understudy and eventual star. Tonight, it's trying to drum up interest in its upcoming one-man play "Lord of Fharlanst." To that end, it will impersonate historical figures several times throughout the night.

[Nebuchadnezzar]

The "Amazing" Falstick and his Bumbling Novices is a stage magic act which caters largely to an audience of spelllcasters. The trio lampoon stereotypes that the general populace have of magic users, while performing slight of hand and tumbling routines choreographed to appear as a series of preposterous accidents, and accompanied by minor alchemical pyrotechnics. A magical minstrelsy tour, of sorts, the troupe is a cover for the cutpurse working the crowd while disguised as an apprentice. Marks are indicated to the pickpocket through the use of catchphrases the act is known for. (Sure glad that wasn't a Stinking Cloud/Magic Missile at the darkness, all that jazz. The characters of any players that groan appreciatively at a gamer pun should end up near a 'misaligned' flashpot)

Wysteria Sinensis is the most recently assumed identity of Adult Greyhawk(Steell) dragon Asterkinazerian, a.k.a. Ster the Shaken. Traumatized as a result of a wyrmlinghood spent on the shoulder of Kern't the (not so)White Necromancer, Ster 'vaulted' her memories, as Greyhawk dragons are wont to do, far sooner than is usual. She has chosen to reinvent herself as a young wizarding student of Suloise extraction, with an interest in extraplanar botanical cultivation. Overhearing the merest mention of theoretical necromancy will cause her to enter a disassociative state and detail with flat affect a litany of horrors certainly unsuitable for party conversation. She is also likely to be offended by anyone with draconic familiars.

[Prak]

Amusingly, I already have a Greyhawk dragon who is the College's librarian attending the party. Though it does seem appropriate that there would be multiple dragons attending a wizard's party.

[Ancient History]

The sex in the coat room is going to be amazing.

Apprentice Broom is an intelligent, animated broom disguised as a human apprentice; it has an unrequited crush on the Mighty Zoon.

[TiaC]

I've seen a few cats suggested. You should totally have a bunch of very similar-looking cats there. One is completely mundane. One is a familiar. One is a Tibbit wizard. One is a golem. One is a polymorphed dragon. One is possessed by a demon. One is...

However, they look all but identical to humanoids.

[rampaging-poet]

Alexis Nomiki Pi is a malfunctioning kolyarut obsessed with the implicit contracts of games and social gatherings. It is dressed in its standard-issue red robe with a lopsided conical hat on its crown. It sometimes becomes lost in thought, causing small blue flashes and clockwork sounds to issue from its head for minutes at a time. In accordance with its built-in mandate to punish oathbreakers, Alexis will enforce the unwritten law of the party: that the host must provide adequate refreshments and entertainment, and that the guests must make a genuine effort to enjoy themselves. When it isn't acting as a referee for party games, it will accost those whose actions it deems insufficiently celebratory and suggest some alternatives. It will also be willing to serve as a witness for any deals or bargains made in its presence, which sometimes causes difficulty when it misinterprets drunken bets as important oaths. As long as its services are not otherwise needed, it is glad to contribute to the party atmosphere by dancing and engaging others in conversation.

Edit to avoid double-post:

Lynette Burke is a local arts dealer specializing in figurines and statuettes. She'd dearly love to buy and sell full-sized marble statues, but concerns over the origins of the last such statue she displayed nearly drove her out of business. Tonight, she's wearing a lincoln green dress that compliments her scaly earthen skin. The snakes that form her hair lie still; they're parted down the middle to form a simple, straight style. A blindfold of clairvoyance set with ruby eyes allows her to see without endangering the other guests. She also carries a small purse with a scroll of stone to flesh and several samples of her wares.

[Whipstitch]

Martin "Chip" Gable, Jr.

Chip is a tall, blustering human with a pot belly and a mid-life crisis. He is currently the head of the intramural wrestling program and an accomplished grapplemancer. Tends to speak in cliches and is prone to inadvertently hassling younger partygoers since he is in denial regarding the age gap.

[Koumei]

The sex in the coat room is going to be amazing.

And oftentimes lethal: the coatroom is a mimic.

[Mask_De_H]

Lucia Loveless, Gossip Extraordinaire, a tall, swarthy and gregarious female bard whose glamered clothing makes it so she never wears the same thing twice. As her name suggests, she loves gossip and has a knack for picking up the juiciest tidbits from across the realm.

Samuel Rosenqueen, is a nondescript man in his early twenties who was cursed by a capricious wizard. Anyone he meets forgets about him within thirty minutes, so he is constantly reintroducing himself, even during conversation.

Yrik Leafrunner is a champion archer and will not hesitate to let you know about it. Broad and squat for an elf, he eschews the traditional forest hues for gaudy reds and golds. Always wants to be the center of attention and has a tendency to get sloppy drunk at parties.

Moni Twostones is an awakened badger with a taste for books and a thirst for knowledge. She enjoys engaging humanoids in debates over art and politics, and acts as a moderator for these debates in the bookstore she owns. She is a strict teetotaler and enjoys the taste of fine tea.

[hyzmarca]

Jojo McJoJo: A squirrel Rogue wearing a stolen ring of intelligence who pretends to be a human Rogue wearing a cursed bracer of squirrel form.

[rampaging-poet]

My SO came up with a few and asked me to post them.

Junko Dewleaf: Junko is a young half-elf student at the Grey College, and is the epitome of the stereotypical over-worked, neurotic student. While she is a gifted wizard, she has all the social grace of a hammer, and has the habit of accidentally setting undesirable people ablaze. She also has the strange habit of carrying around a tattered old spell book that she whispers to when she believes she is alone. Whether or not this book is actually sentient, or a product of Junko's imagination remains a mystery, as she will not allow anyone to examine it. She wears a simple blue cloak, and has a pair of coke bottle glasses which make her eyes appear far larger then they are.

Tarlock, Gorzed and T'matt: Each began their lives as humans, but they were changed into intelligent items by a mad wizard's experiments. They are now literally inseparable and forced to tolerate each other while they search for a solution to their predicament.

Tarlock: Tarlock was once a hapless adventurer whose soul was trapped in an imposing suit of armour. He has been wandering the world ever since they escaped from the basement of the wizard's tower. His soul is wrapped in six-foot tall black steel, and if you were to open the visor, you would see nothing but glowing green light inside. He seeks to constantly keep his blade and shield in line, lest they all get in trouble with the authorities. It's happened enough times already.

Gorzed: Gorzed was a bloodthirsty psychopath as a human and continues to be as a sword despite his lack of limbs. He loves the idea of tearing into his prey and bathing in their blood. He is often annoyed that Tarlock won't let him indulge in his bloodlust, but that makes his few kills all the sweeter. He seems like an ordinary grey blade, but red light radiates from the steel when he speaks. He glows brightly when he has a powerful urge to impale someone, and can at times pull himself from the sheath through sheer willpower alone.

T'matt: T'matt was once a paladin and carries his black and white view of the world into his new form. He sees all that is not wholly good as wholly evil, and seeks to banish all evil in the world. The fact he is now a shield slightly hampers his desires, but he does what he can in his current state of being. He contrasts with Tarlock's armour and glows a brilliant white when he speaks. His edges are as sharp as any sword, and he's covered blue runes. Several sapphires are set in his centre. T'matt will lunge at opponents if Tarlock can't stop him.

[shadzar]

might need a few classmates of the son for the party.

Ridzle "Rid" Gothram, overweight human alteration specialist who often uses his spells to "slim down" and cover just how big he really is. The sons best friend and roommate.

Selina "Ice Queen" Shyvar: cold hearted bitch elf air and water spell caster from a family line of like casters. She hates the nepotism shown to the son and tries to prank him even at the party.

[rampaging-poet]

Dante Mournhold is professor of necromancy at the Grey College. Following his unfortunate death in a laboratory accident last month, he rose as a ghost to continue instructing his pupils. He has vehemently refused resurrection, insisting his death provides an invaluable opportunity for his students to interact with spectral undead and follow the growth of a clone.

Cid Skelhat is one of Professor Mournhold's students. His major is in Historical Conjuration, but he needs a necromancy elective to graduate. Unfortunately he has no real talent for it and is barely making a passing grade. He's agreed to assist the professor by allowing the professor to possess him at times in exchange for extra credit. As such, he'll be stuck by the professor's side most of the night, bored out of his mind by discussion of high-level necromantic theory he can't hope to comprehend. Cid will gratefully accept any excuse to get away and enjoy the party in his own right, especially after Professor Mournhold samples a few drinks in his body.

[pragma]

Robert Smallheart is a human with poorly-kempt, dark hair and a hooked nose. He's the black sheep of a noble family, and his moral character should be inferred by observing that people who earned the name 'smallheart' don't want to hang out with him. He's crashing the party on the strength of the family name and crest, which is on the battered plate that passes for his formalwear. He's going to spend the party attempting to extract information which parties traveled here from out of town and by what routes they're leaving. He wants this information to waylay them on the road later.

[Cynic]

Babu Mani a retired and utterly bored fighter who now dabbles at everything under the sun and, for the most part, fails. Completely full of himself and will spout off on any subject under the earth in the most abrasive method possible. He has become convinced that the gods are not real and will rail about religious stories and epics as matters of history in which the winners only won because of technological superiority (iron age weapons/magic vs. bronze age, etc...) and know how rather than pfft... Correllon Larethian's defeat of Gruumsh.

[Josh_Kablack]

I've seen a few cats suggested. You should totally have a bunch of very similar-looking cats there. One is completely mundane. One is a familiar. One is a Tibbit wizard. One is a golem. One is a polymorphed dragon. One is possessed by a demon. One is....

Jacqueline Grisoir (aka Calico Jackie)
This halfing apprentice monk met a violent end on her initial adventure. But she was then reincarnated into the body of a calico cat by a meddling, but not-exactly friendly druid. While the feline stealth bonuses and racial stats synergize reasonablly well with her finesse monk unarmed build. She's in the difficult position that she's still considers herself honor bound to uphold from the vow of silence that novices of her order are required to take until they complete their first assignment. So she hangs out with the familiars at the wizards college trying to assemble a replacement party to go back and help her cleanse the evil from the tomb of saint so-and-so without being able to speak about it or use opposoble thumbs. Surely if she makes enough of a pest of herself, somebody here will cast the right divinations on her.

The Pale Cat of the West Door
This cat is a solid moonlight white, and stalks silently back and forth behind the great wooden doors of the building's west entrance, only rarely seen and never heard. That's because he's actually just a Silent Image triggered by a harmless "trap" with a trigger spell in one of the far stairwells at the other end of the hall. Nobody's quite sure who made this, but the best guess is that it was long ago placed as a form of silent alarm to let students know when a professor was descending from his office. Upperclassmen often haze newer students by tasking them to catch this "particularly troublesome and likely ensorcelled" cat.

Vervain and her familiar Lorona
Vervain appears as a jet black feline with two collars, one of rhinestone and one of silk with an ornate golden tag dangling from it. Lorona appears as a stereotypical faerie-tail witch, dressed in black with a pointy hat, a broom of flying and a magic wand. The twist is that the roles are reversed. Vervain is a tibbit witch who conned the MC into allowing Improved Familiar to get her a typical fiendish human as her familiar, since humans are technically animals and Natural Spell to work for her racial shapeshifting. Vervain's class Trickery ability renders her immune to Detect ___ spells and True Seeing, and since we're already bending things the generous MC let the familiar share spell and/or empathic link ability count for wand activation.
The pair are at the party primarily to see how well their ruse holds up in a room full of wizards and adventurers, but will be more than happy to take advantage of any opportunities for mischief.

Scruffy William (aka RaRaofffgrr)
Scruffy seems to be severely overweight mangy-looking orange cat with black stripes who is often hacking up hairballs. Scruffy is actually, RaRaoffgrr, a blink dog rogue with max ranks and a collar of disguise. He's thinks someone at the party knows something about the recent increase of unseelie fey into his pack's homeland. He's sorely disappointed in his contact, Lilly Greenstone, who couldn't manage to get him an actual invite and merely suggested that he crash disguised as a more common animal to nose around. Of course, Scruffy is limited by the fact that he doesn't speak common and Blink Dog is a double secret language hidden in the Monster Manual so aside from Lilly and the few PCs who look for that sort of obscure thing he can only talk to people with Tongues active, to everyone else, his speech just sounds like another hairball. Yet he's also afraid of being bounced if any of the official staff find that he's here without an invitation so he's got to be careful around any of the wizards who might have translation magic.

[Maxus]

Death, the Taker of Souls, Defeater of Empires, Swallower of Oceans, Thief of Years, The Ultimate Reality, the Harvester of Mankind. Not necessarily the Grim Reaper of the locality, but a Grim Reaper nonetheless. A seven-foot-tall skeleton in a black robe, and he carries a scythe. His eye sockets glow blue. He's wearing a cardboard party hat over his robe's hood and eating from his own plate of ham rolls. He speaks without sound, but nonetheless it turns up in your head as a somber bass voice that SOUNDS LIKE THIS. Or James Earl Jones. Take your pick.

Nice guy, even if he does look at people like he's counting to himself while he talks to them.

[Darth Rabbitt]

Hmm, I have some characters from old one-shots that might be of use.

Sir Xuchuk the Strong: A quixotic Umber Hulk Barbarian, who considers himself a warrior of Good. He really hates Neogi, mostly because they enslave his people; it is possible that he is related to an enslaved Umber Hulk or two. He wears armor made from Purple Worm hide, and carries a lance that is essentially a Purple Worm stinger with a handle attached. Occasionally, he will ride a Huge Ankheg into battle, although it would not be attending the party with him.

Lieutenant Raxeal: A Tiefling Beguiler (Conduit if using Tome material) descended from an Ultroloth. Has served in Yugoloth armies in the past. In his true form he has glowy Hypnotoad eyes and no mouth. Typically he uses magical disguise to assume the form of a humanoid. He is a compulsive liar and will tell Munchausen-style stories of his deeds as a (whatever he happens to be impersonating) to anyone who listens.

Nairahatarez: A "reformed" Illithid who had a life-changing experience after donning a Helmet of Opposite Alignment. He lives off of a Ring of Sustenance for moral reasons, although at parties and other special occasions he allows himself animal brains, since he misses the flavor and texture of brains. He is fairly laid-back and non-confrontational, although he suggests that other creatures who require eating sapients to "convert" to his lifestyle.

[Prak]

Oh god... the illithid is tempting to include, since the half giant soulknife in the group is the result of illithid experiments.... or illithid cultist experiments, at least. I still need to figure out which.

[Desdan_Mervolam]

Death, the Taker of Souls, Defeater of Empires, Swallower of Oceans, Thief of Years, The Ultimate Reality, the Harvester of Mankind. Not necessarily the Grim Reaper of the locality, but a Grim Reaper nonetheless. A seven-foot-tall skeleton in a black robe, and he carries a scythe. His eye sockets glow blue. He's wearing a cardboard party hat over his robe's hood and eating from his own plate of ham rolls. He speaks without sound, but nonetheless it turns up in your head as a somber bass voice that SOUNDS LIKE THIS. Or James Earl Jones. Take your pick.

Nice guy, even if he does look at people like he's counting to himself while he talks to them.

Alternately he comes dressed all in red and stalks silently and with purpose from room to room. If confronted he will slowly turn to look at the person, and then continue on his way. He will time it so he reaches the center of the grand ballroom at the stroke of midnight and suddenly dissappear. Nothing will happen afterwards, it seems Death just likes to screw with mortals.