A furniture is you.

NineInchNall · Post by **NineInchNall** » Mon Jun 28, 2010 2:04 pm

Inspired by the stupid planar/afterlife/alignment thread in IMHO, what sort of furniture would you prefer to spend eternity as?

Personally, I'd probably go with being a TV cabinet. That way there would always be interesting going on around me, or more accurately inside me, I suppose.

On the other hand, being a podium in a legislative building would be pretty cool, too.

Juton · Post by **Juton** » Mon Jun 28, 2010 5:38 pm

Coat rack, I figure it's easy work and I'd get to see everyone coming and going, living their lives.

Lago PARANOIA · Post by **Lago PARANOIA** » Mon Jun 28, 2010 10:44 pm

High-class Hollywood tanning booth.

Not only would I be able to see everything but I would also be able to lock in the actors/writers/directors I don't like and give them ultra-cancer.

Blasted · Post by **Blasted** » Tue Jun 29, 2010 12:17 am

Lago PARANOIA wrote:High-class Hollywood tanning booth.

Not only would I be able to see everything but I would also be able to lock in the actors/writers/directors I don't like and give them ultra-cancer.

And you've got the plot for a bad horror movie right there.

I'd go with something antique that gets looked after. Anything that isn't going to get bashed in a mover's van.

ubernoob · Post by **ubernoob** » Tue Jun 29, 2010 12:45 am

I'd like to be an important prototype in a museum somewhere. I get well cared for and get to watch people go by all day.

Cynic · Post by **Cynic** » Tue Jun 29, 2010 1:06 am

A table so that some day someone might use me as the awesome weapon that I would be!

Count Arioch the 28th · Tue Jun 29, 2010 1:30 am

To be honest, being almost any type of furniture is better than both the Crhistian version of Heaven and the Christian version of Hell. Both sound unbearable to me.

Cynic · Post by **Cynic** » Tue Jun 29, 2010 2:39 am

Count: I'll agree with you on the Christian concepts of hell and heaven.

I used to mention to people who'd try to convert me in east texas that I often felt that the Christian Heaven seemed like my kinda hell and heaven would just be everyday living as we have now. It frustrated people so and I've even made one wonder how I could consider the idea of heaven and hell that was so taught in churches to be the exact opposite. That one cursed me to burn in hell. he was 16 so I didn't pay him anymind though.

But, yes the banality and reversability of these two concepts definitely make the unbearable to me.

Count Arioch the 28th · Tue Jun 29, 2010 2:44 am

I was told that Heaven was being a disembodied soul for all eternity by my mother when I was about 8. I asked her if there was anything to do and she started getting angry and kept interrupting me with "NO! You're just souls!"

The idea filled me with abject horror, and still does to this day.

Koumei · Post by **Koumei** » Tue Jun 29, 2010 2:55 am

Tablecloth: you get laid three times a day and pulled off after each meal.

(Ba-dum-tish!)

Juton · Post by **Juton** » Tue Jun 29, 2010 3:34 am

My friend described heaven as you just stare at god all day. For eternity. I'd hope he'd be entertaining.

Username17 · Post by **Username17** » Tue Jun 29, 2010 4:28 am

Juton wrote:My friend described heaven as you just stare at god all day. For eternity. I'd hope he'd be entertaining.

I hear god does side splitting impressions.

-Username17

Nicklance · Post by **Nicklance** » Tue Jun 29, 2010 4:46 am

I'll be a d20. Roll on!

angelfromanotherpin · Tue Jun 29, 2010 10:18 am

Twain did a great bit on how Heaven is hellish in Letters From The Earth.

His heaven is like himself: strange, interesting, astonishing, grotesque. I give you my word, it has not a single feature in it that he actually values. It consists -- utterly and entirely -- of diversions which he cares next to nothing about, here in the earth, yet is quite sure he will like them in heaven.

Linky!

TOZ · Post by **TOZ** » Tue Jun 29, 2010 1:00 pm

I'd say microphone stand in a concert hall. Hopefully one that features good music and standup.