Lets Play - Can You Brexit?

SGamerz · Post by **SGamerz** » Tue Jul 23, 2019 11:32 am

Seconded.

Thaluikhain · Post by **Thaluikhain** » Tue Jul 23, 2019 4:03 pm

If you have the keyword QUORUM...
If not...

197

Britain is going to need new trade deals. Even if leaving the EU only reduces our trade with Europe by 10%, that’s still a £200 million blow to the economy every week. It’s not possible to actually conclude or even substantially negotiate new trade agreements before Brexit, but at least you can line them up and bask in the credit.

One option is to look at agreements that the EU is already negotiating with third countries such as Japan. The slowly grinding gears of EU bureaucracy mean that those can take years or even decades to complete. Potentially you could swoop in on a deal like that. And you could close it faster, too. What Britain loses in negotiating strength by going it alone is compensated for by not having to get twenty-seven squabbling states to all sing from the same hymn book. The only snag is that the EU would probably see that as unfairly trading off their hard work. It could make the exit negotiations a lot trickier.

Another option is to go after deals that the EU already has in place with third countries like Mexico and South Korea. As a member state, Britain is a party to those agreements now, so in theory all you’ll need to keep them going is a rubber stamp. And the EU certainly can’t object as everyone is hoping for Britain to ratify those existing agreements as a sign that the post-Brexit arrangement will be business as usual.

But there’s a third option. All-new trade deals would give you something to trumpet about at home without antagonizing the EU too much. Somewhere like the Philippines. The EU has started talks on a free trade agreement there but it’s years away from signature. That’s where you could nip in and show how the UK is the agile egg-stealing mammal to the EU’s lumbering dinosaur.

Have a go at snagging a big new trade deal from under the EU’s nose – with somewhere like the USA, for instance.
Focus on repurposing existing deals between the EU and third countries.
Start discussions on completely new trade agreements involving countries the EU currently don’t have a deal with.

Omegonthesane · Post by **Omegonthesane** » Tue Jul 23, 2019 7:35 pm

Door number two.

SGamerz · Post by **SGamerz** » Wed Jul 24, 2019 1:45 pm

Focus on repurposing existing deals

Darth Rabbitt · Post by **Darth Rabbitt** » Thu Jul 25, 2019 4:10 am

I think it's all about the repurposing.

Thaluikhain · Post by **Thaluikhain** » Thu Jul 25, 2019 10:12 am

234

‘There’s the deal with South Korea,’ suggests your chief of staff.

‘But, Ron, you don’t think it’s too lame? I don’t want to go in front of the electorate with a plate of crumbs and try claiming it’s a whole cake. How much trade do we even do with South Korea?’

‘Tricky one, off the top of my head,’ he says, sucking at his unlit pipe. ‘I know our exports there have trebled over the six years since the EU-Korea free trade agreement was signed. If I had to put a figure on it, probably about a thirtieth the size of our trade with the EU.’

‘Ugh. So we need twenty-nine more deals like that.’

He shakes his head. ‘We already have a deal with Korea, remember. If we can ratify that deal, we’re still just running to stand still.’

Press ahead with the Korean deal anyway.
See if you can steal a march on a deal the EU is already progressing, for example with the US.

SGamerz · Post by **SGamerz** » Fri Jul 26, 2019 11:44 am

Try to steal the US deal

Grek · Post by **Grek** » Fri Jul 26, 2019 6:16 pm

Its got to be the US deal, we can't show up with an empty bag.

Thaluikhain · Post by **Thaluikhain** » Sat Jul 27, 2019 3:13 pm

254

You fly over to Washington and are then kept waiting a day while President Windrip works on his golf handicap down in Florida. When he finally arrives back at the White House he gives you his usual belligerent scowl, like a pensioner spotting a paper delivery kid on his lawn.

‘Great deal. The greatest,’ he says slurrily once you’ve explained that you’d like to accelerate a version of the Transatlantic Trade and Investment Partnership between Britain and the US.

‘Oh, absolutely. There are just a few details we’d need some give and take on. For example, we can’t throw our health services completely open the US pharmaceutical companies. That would mean effectively privatizing the NHS, and British voters wouldn’t stand for it.’

‘Huh.’

You notice that he’s staring off into a corner of the room but you press on anyway. ‘Then there’s the matter of allowing private corporations to sue the government. We can’t claw our sovereignty back from the European Court of Justice only to hand it over to attribution tribunals. You can see…’

He reaches across his desk and starts playing with a Newton’s cradle. Click clack, click clack. You decide to take it as a positive sign that he feels so relaxed with you. He wouldn’t do that with Chancellor Käsen of Germany in the room, you bet. The special relationship at work.

With a warm glow of mutual respect, you conclude by talking about banking regulations. ‘Certainly the current rules are stifling investment, Mr President, and I think you’ll agree with me there. But we have to be careful not to go too far the other way. If the regulations are loosened up too far, we’ll have all the ingredients for another financial crisis.’

It takes him some time to notice you’ve finished talking. Fixing you with a puzzled frown, he says simply, ‘No.’ And then he gets up and leaves.

One of his staff comes over. ‘What the President is saying here is TTIP is a take it or leave it type deal,’ he says. ‘Shall I tell your driver to bring the car round?’

So now what? Going back with no concessions at all will make you look like Windrip’s puppet.

Press ahead with a TTIP-style deal with the US regardless.
Give up on this and just repurpose a trade agreement that’s already in place between the EU and a third country.

Omegonthesane · Post by **Omegonthesane** » Sat Jul 27, 2019 5:19 pm

Give up.

angelfromanotherpin · Post by **angelfromanotherpin** » Sat Jul 27, 2019 6:11 pm

Fuck, that's scarily accurate. Give up.

Darth Rabbitt · Post by **Darth Rabbitt** » Sat Jul 27, 2019 7:58 pm

Give up. Repurpose the Korea deal if possible.

SGamerz · Post by **SGamerz** » Mon Jul 29, 2019 11:28 am

Give up.

Thaluikhain · Post by **Thaluikhain** » Mon Jul 29, 2019 2:18 pm

Bit of running around through sections we've been before, which I've omitted.

124

At least it should be fairly straightforward, you think. After all, Britain is already trading with South Korea, it’s to everyone’s advantage, business is booming, and they won’t want to lose that market when the UK and the EU part company.

In practice it’s not quite that simple. A lot of South Korean exports go through Britain to reach the single market. Now that’s cut off we may not look so attractive a trading partner – or at any rate it gives them an excuse to tweak the terms of the agreement.

‘Look on the bright side, Prime Minister,’ says your chief of staff. ‘We can’t legally sign a new trade agreement with Korea until after Brexit anyway.’

‘How is that a bright side?’

‘It means that whatever extra concessions they manage to squeeze out of us aren’t yet part of the narrative. All we need to announce is that Korea is open to affirming the existing arrangement. It’s a success story once you remove the fiddly details.’

As it turns out, the success is so meagre that the EU doesn’t even object.

On your Brexit Memo Pad:

+5% Popularity: voters buy into the notion of Britain forging exciting new deals across the globe, even when the deals are actually old ones.

Mark International Trade Deals as complete.

152

‘What’s he on the news for? Somebody turn the sound up.’

There’s a bustle as your aides fall over themselves to find the TV remote. Suddenly it’s blaring away.

‘Turn it down. I’m not deaf.’

‘ – the right time for me to rejoin the Conservative Party, yes,’ Colin Fungale is saying. ‘UKIP has served its purpose. Now I’m looking forward to doing my bit as part of the – ’

You seize the remote and stab at the mute button. If only you could erase Fungale from existence with the touch of a button.

‘Allow that odious blot into the Tory Party?’ you fume. ‘Over my dead body.’

‘Well…’ ventures an aide. ‘He is very popular among a certain section of the voters.’

Regardless, you must block him from rejoining the party at all costs.
Maybe it’s not a bad idea at that, if he brings a few million voters with him.

40% Authority
60% Economy
76% Goodwill
51% Popularity

EU Trade Talks, Exit Fee, Immigration, International Trade Deals, Negotiation Strategy, Residency Rights
Bleak, Clarion, Maple

angelfromanotherpin wrote:Fuck, that's scarily accurate.

I know, right.

Omegonthesane · Post by **Omegonthesane** » Mon Jul 29, 2019 6:09 pm

If I could pick "have him assassinated" I would. As is, "block him regardless".

angelfromanotherpin · Post by **angelfromanotherpin** » Mon Jul 29, 2019 7:23 pm

Block him.

Darth Rabbitt · Post by **Darth Rabbitt** » Tue Jul 30, 2019 5:05 am

Omegonthesane wrote:If I could pick "have him assassinated" I would. As is, "block him regardless".

SGamerz · Post by **SGamerz** » Tue Jul 30, 2019 11:45 am

Block

Thaluikhain · Post by **Thaluikhain** » Tue Jul 30, 2019 2:32 pm

Perhaps easier said than done. Fungale follows up by announcing his intention to stand as a Parliamentary candidate if the Conservatives will have him. He’s picked a clapped-out East Anglian seaside town where the current incumbent is a forlorn hope of the Remain wing of the party.

The local constituency are fawning over Fungale already. They think they have a superstar offering to represent them, so it’s not going to be easy to block his membership.

What kind of sway do you have in the party these days?
Check your Brexit Memo Pad. If your Authority is 86% or more...
Otherwise...

Have you got the keyword PEDAL? Yes...
No...

Your backbenchers make it clear in no uncertain terms that they are not going to let you blackball Fungale.

‘We need him,’ says Sir Harvey Doggerbank, chairman of the 1922 Committee. ‘All of this is happening because of him. He’s the architect of Brexit, and his flavour of politics is what a lot of people want.’

‘Oh, I know what you’re driving at. Honest bloke, likes a pint, always guffawing away like the kind of unrepentant rapscallion who knows he’ll get a pass from an indulgent granny. Not a remote, middle-aged, over-educated career dinosaur like me, eh? I suppose you’d like to hand him the keys to Number 10 while you’re at it?’

You mean it as a bitter joke, but what’s most disturbing is the look of wild surmise that flashes across Doggerbank’s face. You’ve given him an idea. Mark the keyword NYLON, then...

Only six months now remain of the two-year countdown to Brexit that began when you invoked Article 50.
►666 and highlight one of the boxes there before doing anything else.

666
□ □ □

This is different from any other section in the book. Do not highlight one of the boxes above unless you were specifically told to do so in the section you’ve just turned from.

If none of the boxes is highlighted...
If one box is highlighted...
If two boxes are highlighted...
If all three boxes are highlighted...

By the way, if you need a rest from running the country – well, it’s a stressful job and nobody could blame you. This is a good place to take a break. Just be sure to bookmark this section so you can find your place later.

469
□

If the box above was already highlighted, immediately...

400

(A lot of checking for codewords that I've not pasted the text for)

‘He’s only gone and done it,’ says your chief of staff, flinging down the paper in disgust.

‘SHEEP WATCH OUT! FUNGALE BACK IN THE FOLD,’ reads the headline. So he made it. Colin Fungale will be taking his seat as a Conservative MP.

‘I only hope his attendance record in the Commons is better than it was in the European Parliament.’

You may try to make light of it, but this feels like storm clouds gathering.

To be briefed on the issues you’re facing...
Who has time for briefings? When the going gets tough, the tough get going!

(Looking at the briefings, there is some stuff we've been over, but also some new stuff there)

(Also, going back and forth ticking boxes gets confusing, took me a while to spot I'd forgotten one)

angelfromanotherpin · Post by **angelfromanotherpin** » Tue Jul 30, 2019 3:22 pm

No time get moving.

Omegonthesane · Post by **Omegonthesane** » Tue Jul 30, 2019 6:14 pm

Embezzle everything and run get moving.

SGamerz · Post by **SGamerz** » Thu Aug 01, 2019 11:52 am

Get moving

Thaluikhain · Post by **Thaluikhain** » Thu Aug 01, 2019 1:34 pm

450
□

If the box above is already highlighted...Otherwise read on.

Perhaps you need a break? Pressure of the job starting to take its toll? This is the final phase of talks, so it’s a good time to take a breather if you need one. On the other hand, if you have the energy to make that final push towards a successful Brexit, read on.

Time is running out, and you can’t be everywhere at once. Still, don’t they say that a good leader learns to delegate? With only a few months left before Brexit, you can see to just a single major issue in person. Choose from any below that are not already marked as complete on your Brexit Memo Pad:

Deal with the NHS (if not already marked as complete) – highlight the box above, then...

Decide whether to hold a Second Referendum (if not already complete) – highlight the box and then...

Tackle the issue of Residency Rights of UK and EU citizens (if not already complete) – highlight the box and then...

Deal with the question of UK/EU Security and Defence cooperation (if not already complete) – highlight the box and then...

Attempt to call a General Election (if not already complete) – highlight the box and then...

Agree the Exit Fee (only if you have the keyword APRICITY and Exit Fee is not marked as complete) – highlight the box and then...

Deal with EU Trade Talks (if not already complete) – highlight the box and then...

Start talks on International Trade Deals (if not already complete) – highlight the box and then...

When you have dealt with one of these issues, or if all issues are already marked as complete...

angelfromanotherpin · Post by **angelfromanotherpin** » Thu Aug 01, 2019 2:49 pm

So the issue now is passing the damn vote. Our Authority is in the toilet, and I don't think we have the popularity needed to improve it with a General Election, and while we might be able to shore up our popularity by tinkering with the NHS, I'm pretty sure we don't have time to do that and also election.

It's possible that if we get our Popularity high enough that our Authority won't matter? But it's also possible that tinkering with the NHS in a way that makes us more popular will erode our Authority further because the Tories are a bunch of prole-hating asshats?

So I say fuck it. Hold a Second Referendum. If Leave wins again, it should be extra pressure for the deal we've negotiated, and if Remain wins we can just do the right thing and uninvoke Article 50. That'll probably end our notional career, but that's a sacrifice I'm willing to make.

Darth Rabbitt · Post by **Darth Rabbitt** » Thu Aug 01, 2019 5:20 pm

That sounds like a good plan to me. Seconded.