Lol, Religion

TiaC · Post by **TiaC** » Tue Nov 19, 2013 8:00 pm

No, see, they are aware on some level that if everyone followed their crazy beliefs the world would go to shit. Once the world goes to shit, Christ will have no choice but to return. It's basically a giant game of chicken.

Maj · Post by **Maj** » Tue Nov 19, 2013 11:35 pm

nockermensch wrote:It's funny how evangelicals believe that A) Christ will return once the world is thrown into chaos AND believe that B) forcing their form of morals on everybody will fix the world.

There's no actual paradox.

Christ isn't supposed to return once the world is thrown into chaos. He's supposed to return once everyone has had a chance to hear the gospel. This is why the point of Christianity is to spread. The fact that the world will be a huge pile of chaos just means that the message recipients didn't like what they heard and chose not to comply.

tussock · Post by **tussock** » Wed Nov 20, 2013 4:46 am

I think nockers missed some steps.

1) Christ will return, soon. By definition.
2) The world will be in Xaos when Christ returns. Bible says so.
3) By 1&2, Xaos is ever-nearer and everything is very likely a sign of it.
4) Only the righteously faithful can avoid eternal damnation when Christ comes.
5) By 3&4, everything is very important sign that people must be more faithful.

There's more, but it's turtles all the way down from there. You urgently need "saved", aka infected with their bullshit mindworm, so you can help spread the memes. Because ideas are like genes, and the common ones are better at surviving and reproducing than others.

RobbyPants · Post by **RobbyPants** » Fri Dec 13, 2013 2:29 pm

Lol. Fox News host claims that not only was Jesus a historical figure, he was white!

tussock · Post by **tussock** » Sat Dec 14, 2013 3:43 am

Not just white, blonde Scandinavian white with blue eyes. Spoke English too, don't you know. Also a Christian. Went to church every Sunday. No mixed-race parentage. Believed in the benefits of slavery and preached that personal wealth is proof of divinity.

Neat thing about imaginary friends, they can be whatever you want them to be and you can't possibly be wrong about it.

St Nicholas, OTOH, was a black guy. Santa's white, but that's because he's Odin, and again, an imaginary friend invented by white people, and dressed by Coca-Cola.

Maj · Post by **Maj** » Sat Dec 14, 2013 4:50 am

RobbyPants wrote:Lol. Fox News host claims that not only was Jesus a historical figure, he was white!

Jon Stewart's response to this last night was great.

Prak · Post by **Prak** » Sat Dec 14, 2013 5:21 am

For those who didn't see it

RobbyPants · Post by **RobbyPants** » Mon Dec 16, 2013 1:49 am

Ha! Thanks for that.

Stahlseele · Post by **Stahlseele** » Mon Dec 16, 2013 2:09 am

Aaarg, i always read the thread title as "lol railgun" at first . . .

Post by **fbmf** » Mon Dec 16, 2013 12:35 pm

Prak_Anima wrote:For those who didn't see it

Quality.

Game On,
fbmf

RobbyPants · Post by **RobbyPants** » Mon Dec 16, 2013 1:20 pm

Stahlseele wrote:Aaarg, i always read the thread title as "lol railgun" at first . . .

I might have enjoyed church more as a kid if this was how it worked.

"We're going to church."

"What's that?"

"It's a social club where you go to practice your railgun."

"Fuck yeah!"

JigokuBosatsu · Post by **JigokuBosatsu** » Thu Dec 19, 2013 6:35 pm

RobbyPants wrote:
Stahlseele wrote:Aaarg, i always read the thread title as "lol railgun" at first . . .
I might have enjoyed church more as a kid if this was how it worked.

"We're going to church."

"What's that?"

"It's a social club where you go to practice your railgun."

"Fuck yeah!"

I'd convert in a heartbeat.

Maxus · Post by **Maxus** » Tue Dec 24, 2013 6:11 am

Pope Francis strikes at the heart of Christianity Conservatanity yet again!

The article wrote:Atheists should be seen as good people if they do good, Pope Francis said Wednesday in his latest urging that people of all religions — or no religion — work together.

Maj · Post by **Maj** » Tue Dec 24, 2013 5:30 pm

erik · Post by **erik** » Tue Dec 24, 2013 6:00 pm

Maxus wrote:Pope Francis strikes at the heart of Christianity Conservatanity yet again!

The article wrote:Atheists should be seen as good people if they do good, Pope Francis said Wednesday in his latest urging that people of all religions — or no religion — work together.

Remember all the hubbub when he said that back in May? *cough*

Koumei · Post by **Koumei** » Wed Dec 25, 2013 12:04 am

Hey, he's allowed to copy-pasta with his trolling!

Ancient History · Post by **Ancient History** » Wed Dec 25, 2013 9:54 pm

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Christian_headcovering

Prak · Post by **Prak** » Wed Dec 25, 2013 11:57 pm

My mother wears a veil (more like a lace headscarf, it doesn't cover her face) to mass. She decided to do it after a dream of her praying at a shrine to Mary while wearing one.

RobbyPants · Post by **RobbyPants** » Thu Dec 26, 2013 1:40 pm

Prak_Anima wrote:My mother wears a veil (more like a lace headscarf, it doesn't cover her face) to mass. She decided to do it after a dream of her praying at a shrine to Mary while wearing one.

It always creeps me out when people have "predictive" dreams about things and they adjust their behavior to match them. These aren't always religious in nature, but it weirds me out when people think they can tell the future with their dreams.

Chamomile · Post by **Chamomile** » Thu Dec 26, 2013 2:04 pm

What weirds me out is when dreams successfully predict the future. Considering the fairly small number of dreams I remember upon waking, it does seem odd that they should be able to predict fairly specific events before they happen just through random chance.

DSMatticus · Post by **DSMatticus** » Thu Dec 26, 2013 2:27 pm

The correct metric for evaluating foresight is batting average, not whether or not there are hits, or even how many hits there are. Though, if a giant squid ever ends up attacking the whitehouse, or the hamburglar or power rangers ever try to murder me, I will concede that maybe something is up with this whole dream business.

Prak · Post by **Prak** » Thu Dec 26, 2013 7:51 pm

I wouldn't call it predictive. She seems to believe that Mary was communicating with her through that dream. If that's true, then god just told me to go find a polyamourous aging hippie couple to fuck.

Chamomile · Post by **Chamomile** » Fri Dec 27, 2013 8:34 am

My point is not that dreams are an effective means of predicting the future. My point is that, while still too low to be effective, the success rate of dreams as a means of predicting the future spooks me, because that success rate isn't explained by anything I can think of (including white noise occasionally mimicking reality; there aren't enough remembered dreams to hit the critical mass where you'd expect them to successfully predict future events by random chance).

Prak · Post by **Prak** » Fri Dec 27, 2013 9:16 am

And my point is that she didn't think the dream was predictive of anything, but rather instructive.

Kaelik · Post by **Kaelik** » Fri Dec 27, 2013 10:03 am

Chamomile wrote:the success rate of dreams as a means of predicting the future spooks me

You are an idiot. The success rate of dreams at predicting the future is less than the success rate of asking someone what they think will happen in the future.

Does it spook you that when you ask people about the future they are sometimes correct and often not?