Let's Play Final Fantasy #22: Robot Commando

[angelfromanotherpin]

So, since 1) Island of the Lizard King is rapidly approaching its end, 2) enthusiasm for more such seems high, and 3) DarthRabbitt will be taking a break, I will be stepping in to fill in the vacuum.

• In Demons of the Deep, pirates capture the good ship Sunfish, and hurl first mate Peter Manwoody into the sea; surviving somehow, he seeks revenge from beneath the waves, which will almost certainly involve some flavor of MURMAIDER. (link probably nsfw)

• Freeway Fighter takes place in the post-apocalyptic future of 1983 2022 where Cross Chris must get in his excessively dope car and go on the quest for more gasoline!

• The titular Robot Commando is not actually a robot. Max Fightmaster XI is in fact a man who pilots mecha to herd dinosaurs on the third most metal ranch in the galaxy, and who must repurpose his T-rex wrangling skills to fight off a planetary invasion while carrying a sword for no reason.

[angelfromanotherpin]

One more vote to break the tie would be appreciated.

edit: and done! Robot Commando it shall be.

[angelfromanotherpin]

FF actually had a whole pile of SF-themed books. Unlike the fantasy line, which almost universally took place in the same world, I don't think any of the SF ones had continuity at all; the first was a clear Star Trek knockoff, I think another one was a rip-off of a 2000 AD property, and so on.

I'm not going to give the standard FF boilerplate at the start. I will however, spill the dirt on how to pilot mecha.

1. You can pilot any robot you find, but you can only take one with you at a time - no tow-cables or slave-circuiting or workarounds.
2. Robots have an Armour score which functions like Stamina for robot-scale combat. Losing robo-combat is generally as fatal as losing normal combat.
3. Robots have a Speed. Faster robots have +1 combat strength against slower robots. The text also contradicts itself on a speed-related point: in one place it says you can't escape from a faster enemy, in another place it says you must be faster than the enemy to escape.
4. Fighting with a robot uses the pilot's SKILL, but a particularly fighty robot may give a bonus, or an unfighty robot may give a penalty.

BACKGROUND

You are a rancher in the land of Thalos. Your people (and your enemies, the savage Karosseans) have built huge robots for many purposes. With a skilled operator at the controls, a robot can replace a hundred men – to mine ore, erect buildings, – move cargo, or just about anything else.

The robots are also your best defence against the vicious dinosaurs of Thalos. Many years ago, the great lizards caused much destruction. But now mankind has learned to tame the beasts, and many of the folk of Thalos – like you – are dinosaur ranchers. The ranchers use Mark 5A utility robots, known as 'cowboys', to herd the dinosaurs! But wild dinosaurs are still dangerous, and all robots have guns to defend themselves.

Early one morning you are just finishing your breakfast when one of your assistants staggers into the kitchen. 'So sleepy,' he says. Then he sits down at the table, pillows his head on his arms and goes to sleep!

You shake him, but you cannot rouse him. Alarmed, you go for help. But everyone else you see is asleep.

You rush back inside and switch on a radio. But you can only get scraps of messages: 'Everybody asleep... Karossean attack... can't stay awake...' Soon there is nothing to be heard. You go outside again and pour cold water on several of your friends – but they just snore and mutter.

Then you hear a rumble overhead, like thunder out of the clear sky. You look up. Streaking overhead is the unmistakable shape of a Karossean robojet!

You realize what must have happened. Somehow, the Karosseans have managed to put everyone in Thalos to sleep... everyone but you. For some reason, you are immune.

Over the next few hours, you listen to the enemy communications and piece together the story. In the past, the Karosseans had steered clear of Thalos; with its brave warriors and its many robots, your land was too tough to attack. But Minos, their leader, hit on a clever plan. His spies spread capsules of a virulent sleeping sickness – and before long, all Thalos was asleep! Soon you hear a broadcast from Minos himself, talking to his invading troops. An elite force of a thousand warriors, with hundreds of robots, has invaded Thalos. But this is only the beginning. With the population helpless, Minos plans to loot your country. Its riches and its robots will be his; its people will be sold as slaves! And only you can stop it...

You know what you have to do. You walk back inside and buckle your father's old sword to your waist. Food will be no problem – you know supplies will be easy to find – but you pick up a supply of five medikits. Then you head for the robot parking-area. Alone, you must defeat the Karossean invaders and free your land!

NOW TURN THE PAGE

(Huh, I guess it's not really a planetary invasion after all; it really does read like Thalos is just a country or something. Not a big one either, given the invasion force is so bullshit small, even counting robot force-multiplication. Also, why a sword, Max? Why?)

At the robot parking-area, you stop and look around. There are several robots there, but only two seem suitable for long-distance travel. You study them both. You can take:

• A standard 'cowboy' walking robot, which is not fast, but sturdy and adaptable.

This man-shaped robot is designed for dinosaur-herding. It moves by walking. It has weapons for dealing with rogue dinosaurs, but they are not as powerful as those of a war robot.
COWBOY ROBOT
Armour: 10, Speed: Medium, Combat Bonus: 0

• A light flyer, which is very speedy and maneuverable, but not really intended for combat.

This flying robot, called a Dragonfly Model D, looks like a gigantic Dragonfly, complete with buzzing wings. Its main advantage in combat is its speed.
DRAGONFLY MODEL D
Armour: 5, Speed: Very Fast, Combat Bonus: 0
Special Ability: Because this craft is so maneuverable, you can escape from any opponent – even another Very Fast one – if given the option to Escape

(because choosing either shows you the robot's stats and lets you change your mind, I've just dumped the full descriptions here instead)

Oh, and our hero...

Max Fightmaster XI, Thalosean Rancher
SKILL: 10
STAMINA: 19
LUCK: 9

POSSESSIONS:
Sword
Five Medikits (Each can restore 1 lost point of STAMINA)

(So, Max is not as fightmaster as he could be. Also, futuristic medikits suck compared to fantasy provisions)

[Dr_Noface]

Each medikit is merely an entire bag of bananas and coconuts.

[Username17]

We should take the Light Flyer. It's +1 to stabbing things and we can escape from stuff. Which considering that Max Fightmaster XI is not as fightmastery as his esteemed Fightmaster ancestors, he'll need the bonus. Also I suspect that we are going to get a new Robot pretty soon.

-Username17

[angelfromanotherpin]

Each medikit is merely an entire bag of bananas and coconuts.

I think 'medikit' may be futurespeak for 'band-aid.'

[Darth Rabbitt]

Does the option to automatically Escape in any fight where it's an option mean that we can escape without getting hurt? I know that normally escaping takes 2 damage because "such is the price of cowardice." 1 point of Attack Strength is generally worth 5 of STAMINA, so I guess I'll go with Frank, and take the Light Flyer.

And I think it's clear that we take our father's sword because it is the legendary Blade of the Fightmasters, which cleaved a wild ankylosaurus' great, knobbed tail in twain before being driven from its ass to its mouth, rending the beast's tummy open in the process. It also has a rare cortosis weave that makes it useful in lightsaber combat.

As an aside, isn't this one of the few done by the US Steve Jackson (of Steve Jackson Games, rather than UK Steve Jackson's Games Workshop?)

[angelfromanotherpin]

As an aside, isn't this one of the few done by the US Steve Jackson (of Steve Jackson Games, rather than UK Steve Jackson's Games Workshop?)

(Yeah, he also did Scorpion Swamp and Demons of the Deep, but stopped after this one.)

Now what are you going to do? You know that, although there are probably Karosseans everywhere, their base is at the Capital City. But you can't just charge in there and attack them with your little robot! You must prepare well before you make your move. Fortunately, there are many cities in Thalos. You will be able to search the whole country for help, if need be, before you confront the invaders. Two large cities are fairly close.

Do you want to go to:
• The City of Knowledge?
• The City of Industry?

(Did... someone forget to fill in names and just leave us with the placeholders? Or did the country actually just found a pile of unimaginatively named theme settlements?)

[JigokuBosatsu]

There had better be some GREAT KNOBBED TAIL action. I agree on the Light Flyer.

EDIT: Also, Max Fightmaster should go to the City of Knowledge. I don't think his robot can fly to California.

[Username17]

We should go to Industry. That is in California.

-Username17

[Darth Rabbitt]

INDUSTRY, SCIENCE AND TECHNOLOGY!
BIG MEN PUTTING SCREWDRIVERS INTO THINGS... TURNING THEM AND ADJUSTING THEM!
BUILD YOUR OWN ATOM STORAGE BOX!
BRINGING YOU THE LATEST IN SOFT SERVE TECHNOLOGY!
SNAPS OFF CAPS OF ANY JUG, BOTTLE OR JAR. AND IT REALLY, REALLY WORKS.

Ahem. I mean we go to Industry.

[angelfromanotherpin]

You set a course for the City of Industry, a place of great factories and machinery. There, you reason, you might find a robot or invention that would give you an advantage over the invaders.

(Max is in the Dragonfly)

You are in the City of Industry. Normally, it is busy and bustling, but now you see no life anywhere. Everyone is asleep... everyone but you. Where will you go in your quest for useful artefacts:

• The Fuel-refining Plant?
• The Robot Experimental Center?
• The tunnels underneath the city?
• Just explore?
• Leave the city?

[Darth Rabbitt]

If we're looking for robots or inventions, then the Robot Experimental Center is the obvious choice.

[JigokuBosatsu]

Hell yeah Robots! Max needs to look for a robot centipede with lasers on each leg.

[Red_Rob]

We're not playing Fuel Refinery Commando. Let's go!

[angelfromanotherpin]

This is the Robot Experimental Center.

(We have not been here before)

You know little about the Center except its name, but you have heard rumors that top-secret work is being done here.

You are in the lobby of the Robot Experimental Center. You read the directory, and see that different sorts of work are being done on different floors of the building. Several seem interesting. Where will you go:

• Second Floor: Interface Mechanisms?
• Third Floor: Weapons Development?
• Sixth Floor: Amplifier Project?
• Tenth Floor: Deteronics?
• Leave the Building?

(Man, the description here is super-bare bones. Also, we may or may not have just flown our giant metal dragonfly inside this building.)

[Darth Rabbitt]

Deteronics appears to be a completely made up word and as such it probably has some awesome (or possibly terrible) shit there.

Either way I think we have to go there.

[JigokuBosatsu]

Yeah, Deteronics. It could be force fields or some shit.

[angelfromanotherpin]

On the tenth floor, you find an incredible profusion of cubbyholes and nothing that looks like a robot or device. There are tall bookshelves everywhere, and more books on the floor and the desks.

• Continue to investigate?
• Return to the lobby? (choices as before)

[JigokuBosatsu]

We're here, might as well investigate. There could be skin mags.

[Darth Rabbitt]

If we see nothing but are given the option to investigate further, we investigate further. Searching the room is the Fightmaster way.

[angelfromanotherpin]

You poke around, looking for something useful. You find nothing, but a huge book falls from a high shelf and hits you on the head. Lose 1 STAMINA point. The other bookshelves are teetering ominously. You leave in disgust and return to the lobby.

• Second Floor: Interface Mechanisms?
• Third Floor: Weapons Development?
• Sixth Floor: Amplifier Project?
• Leave the Building?

(What happened, Max? Today you have suffered the least metal injury of all time. Fightmasters of generations past are disappoint.)

[JigokuBosatsu]

Max goes to weapons development to find something to kill himself with.

[Darth Rabbitt]

Yeah, weapons.

[angelfromanotherpin]

When you leave the lift on the third floor, you immediately spy a man-sized Guard Robot standing in the hallway. 'Sorry. No admittance,' squawks its mechanical voice. What will you do:

• Try to reason with the robot?
• Attack the robot?
• Go to another floor? (specify)