It Comes in Threes: Tome IRC game

[For Valor]

I'll work on that.

For now, I can't connect. The computer can't verify the publisher, so it won't run the chat client.

[Mask_De_H]

derp

[Mask_De_H]

Transcribed, for her pleasure.

(9:45:44 PM) The topic for #valhalla is: Welcome to #Valhalla. It's a bit like playing Kick the Can -- it requires stealth, guile, patience, and a small amount of cheating.
(9:46:01 PM) Aria [aa@Nightstar-2ac2baf4.bois.qwest.net] entered the room.
(9:46:02 PM) Mask_de_GM: Sorry I'm late folks, go see dinner for schmucks
(9:46:07 PM) Mask_de_GM: We got our dicebot?
(9:46:11 PM) Aria: Oh, how was it?
(9:46:12 PM) GX: Seem so.
(9:46:18 PM) Mask_de_GM: Pretty damn good
(9:46:21 PM) Mask_de_GM: Rollcall please
(9:46:22 PM) Aria: Mask_de_GM rolled please --> error: malformed expression
(9:46:22 PM) DicesaurusRex: Mask_de_GM rolled please --> error: malformed expression
(9:46:41 PM) Aria: Pixels reporting for duty, sah!
(9:46:46 PM) Hypolita: Prak here
(9:47:14 PM) ***Aria summons Andrew_Jackson
(9:47:15 PM) GX: I'm just lurking. Don't mind me. Shame I missed all but one of the last WLD games.
(9:47:41 PM) Mask_de_GM: We need three to make a party folks
(9:48:07 PM) Aria: uber is around, it just seems he is not looking at the screen at this exact moment
(9:48:28 PM) Mask_de_GM: Ah
(9:49:25 PM) Hypolita: other than that, we still haven't seen Koumei or Valor
(9:51:22 PM) Andrew_Jackson: my bad
(9:51:27 PM) Andrew_Jackson: I was distracted by cake
(9:51:30 PM) Mask_de_GM: Alright cool
(9:51:51 PM) Mask_de_GM: Now, for the new people: I subscribe to the indysleaze method of DMing
(9:52:02 PM) Mask_de_GM: if it sounds like a good enough idea, I will run with it
(9:52:13 PM) Hypolita: works for me
(9:52:18 PM) Mask_de_GM: if you don't like the way something is going, come up with something interesting and we might just do that
(9:52:29 PM) Hypolita: gimme one moment to go get more dinner and I'll be back and ready to go
(9:52:44 PM) Aria: Right-o
(9:54:01 PM) Andrew_Jackson: It's a good thing the game got moved to today.
(9:54:08 PM) Andrew_Jackson: Yesterday I would have missed it.
(9:54:28 PM) Mask_de_GM: So, last time Andrew Jackson was being persuaded by the Aasimar clergy of the great and terrible Whateverthefuck into doing some PR work for their kind. And by PR work, I mean terrible slaughter of cooler races
(9:54:34 PM) Mask_de_GM: You guys good with that?
(9:54:59 PM) Aria: Fine by me.
(9:55:14 PM) Andrew_Jackson: I'm in favor of storming the mindflayer enclave
(9:55:17 PM) Andrew_Jackson: Those guys are jerks
(9:55:18 PM) Aria: Nothing quite like some wholesome wholesale slaughter
(9:56:15 PM) Mask_de_GM: Uh, Pixels?
(9:56:20 PM) Aria: Hm?
(9:56:20 PM) Mask_de_GM: Where's your complete sheet again?
(9:56:30 PM) Aria: https://docs.google.com/Doc?docid=0ATK3 ... y=CJWWoOsF
(9:56:46 PM) Hypolita: back
(9:57:53 PM) Mask_de_GM: Alright cool
(9:58:24 PM) Hypolita: that background sounds good to me
(9:59:14 PM) Mask_de_GM: So, the Aasimar sister gets you all acquainted, points you towards a tower with a great stone brain atop it and gives you her blessing in the form of a [WHITE RIBBON]
(9:59:33 PM) Mask_de_GM: Now would be a good time to info dump
(9:59:51 PM) Mask_de_GM: AJ, tell 'em about the giant flying centipede with the bar attached to it
(10:00:32 PM) Aria: Bar as in full of delicious alcoholic beverages?
(10:00:41 PM) Andrew_Jackson: Technically it's Kaelik's bar
(10:00:44 PM) Andrew_Jackson: but it's on loan for a bit
(10:00:56 PM) Andrew_Jackson: and my huge flying centipede is carrying the bar
(10:01:04 PM) Mask_de_GM: So it's yours by squatter's rights
(10:01:12 PM) Andrew_Jackson: his name is fluffy and he has daddy issues that he drowns with booze
(10:01:26 PM) Hypolita: reminds me of my exes...
(10:01:36 PM) Andrew_Jackson: Don't worry, he's cute and harmless
(10:01:42 PM) Andrew_Jackson: I ride him into battle carrying the bar
(10:01:46 PM) Andrew_Jackson: How this works, I have no clue
(10:01:48 PM) Andrew_Jackson: magic
(10:01:56 PM) Mask_de_GM: It's magic, I don't have to explain shit
Unknown command.
(10:02:01 PM) Aria: A wizard did it
(10:02:12 PM) Mask_de_GM: Technically, a Conduit did it, but close enough
(10:02:16 PM) Hypolita: I'm surprised the battle continues when a bar enters...
(10:02:32 PM) Mask_de_GM: Well, there was a battle *in* the bar once
(10:02:39 PM) Andrew_Jackson: The bar was conjured
(10:02:50 PM) Andrew_Jackson: When I wrote 'A warmage, a conduit, and a paladin walk into a bar'
(10:02:55 PM) Andrew_Jackson: so, there's a bar
(10:02:58 PM) Mask_de_GM: yep
(10:02:58 PM) Andrew_Jackson: well, this is the second bar
(10:03:05 PM) Andrew_Jackson: but there must always has bar
(10:03:18 PM) Mask_de_GM: no good adventuring party should be without a bar
(10:03:25 PM) Hypolita: works for me
(10:04:15 PM) Mask_de_GM: meanwhile, while the fourth wall is being throughly demolished, you pass over hill and dale, over a nondescript burning wreckage in the general shape of a town
(10:04:58 PM) Mask_de_GM: And out to sea, where the brain tower awaits; it seems to be moving towards shore slowly but surely
(10:05:49 PM) Hypolita: it's a sea worthy brain tower?
(10:05:50 PM) Andrew_Jackson: "That looks icky. We should stop it. Suggested plan of attack?"
(10:06:17 PM) Hypolita: "wait, it's stone, right? I might be able to cause some good damage there...."
(10:07:15 PM) Mask_de_GM: "Of course it's stone you simple halfbreed, what else would it be, candy?"
(10:07:25 PM) Mask_de_GM: a smarmy voice rings in Hypolita's ears
(10:08:34 PM) Hypolita: "Hey, in this world, yeah. It could be."
(10:08:39 PM) Hypolita: "and who the hell said that?"
(10:08:50 PM) Mask_de_GM: "Who do you think?"
(10:09:06 PM) Hypolita: "AJ can this bug talk?"
(10:09:11 PM) Andrew_Jackson: "Nope"
(10:09:17 PM) Andrew_Jackson: "Well, not to you"
(10:09:20 PM) Mask_de_GM: "You're getting dangerously close to the destruction of your puny Tolkienesque brain"
(10:09:35 PM) Hypolita: "Oh gods damn it..."
(10:09:43 PM) Hypolita: "fucking brain squids"
(10:09:48 PM) Mask_de_GM: "Turn back now, all of you, and we won't feast upon you for party favors"
(10:10:32 PM) Andrew_Jackson: "Fuck you, you fucking fucker"
(10:10:50 PM) Andrew_Jackson: roll 1d20+19 spot
(10:10:51 PM) Aria: Andrew_Jackson rolled 1d20+19 spot --> [ 1d20=18 ]{37}
(10:10:51 PM) DicesaurusRex: Andrew_Jackson rolled 1d20+19 spot --> [ 1d20=13 ]{32}
(10:11:33 PM) Mask_de_GM: {Oh god, there are two Andrew Jacksons}
(10:11:36 PM) Aria: Drat
(10:11:44 PM) Aria: I thought I had unloaded that
(10:12:03 PM) Mask_de_GM: Aria and AJ notice strange ripplings of the air around them, circling tighter and tighter around Fluffy
(10:12:20 PM) Andrew_Jackson: I have see invisibility up, is that relevant?
(10:12:33 PM) Mask_de_GM: Yes, yes it is
(10:13:16 PM) Mask_de_GM: AJ can see a squad of girls in frilly outfits and tentacles for mouths riding broomsticks in a V-formation
(10:13:21 PM) Mask_de_GM: there's 5 of them
(10:13:26 PM) Mask_de_GM: on Fluffy's six
(10:13:46 PM) Mask_de_GM: [FIGHT] [ITEM] [RUN] [GENUFLECT]
(10:13:49 PM) Andrew_Jackson: "Bitches are that way. They're invisible. Power of Fire!"
(10:14:03 PM) Andrew_Jackson: [cue captain planet]
(10:14:19 PM) Hypolita: "Light 'em up AJ"
(10:14:57 PM) Andrew_Jackson: Gunna area dispel them all with greater dispel.
(10:15:06 PM) Andrew_Jackson: roll 1d20+8 greater dispel magic
(10:15:07 PM) Aria: Andrew_Jackson rolled 1d20+8 greater dispel magic --> [ 1d20=8 ]{16}
(10:15:07 PM) DicesaurusRex: Andrew_Jackson rolled 1d20+8 greater dispel magic --> [ 1d20=4 ]{12}
(10:15:11 PM) DicesaurusRex: (one moment on the dice rolling)
(10:15:18 PM) DicesaurusRex: Or just use the first for now
(10:15:33 PM) DicesaurusRex left the room (quit: [NS] Quit: ).
(10:17:17 PM) ***Aria pokes it
(10:17:21 PM) Aria: Dratted scripts
(10:17:27 PM) Mask_de_GM: The bubble of cloaking pops like, well, a bubble
(10:17:49 PM) Mask_de_GM: allowing the whole party to see the betentacled strike team
(10:17:56 PM) Hypolita: Hey mask, interesting question that just came to mind: my armour is sand, does that mean I can use my spell likes that require earth from my armour?
(10:18:12 PM) Mask_de_GM: You mean two thirds of them?
(10:18:16 PM) Hypolita: "Eugh. I think I was happier when I couldn't see them..."
(10:18:24 PM) Hypolita: yeah, pretty much
(10:18:35 PM) Mask_de_GM: sure, what the hell, but that'll cut into the armor's abilities
(10:18:47 PM) Hypolita: I was just wondering, it just occured to me
(10:18:54 PM) Mask_de_GM: anyway, gimme initiative folks
(10:19:01 PM) Mask_de_GM: it's danmaku time
(10:19:25 PM) Andrew_Jackson: roll 1d20+1 init
(10:19:25 PM) Aria: Andrew_Jackson rolled 1d20+1 init --> [ 1d20=9 ]{10}
(10:19:38 PM) Hypolita: roll 1d20+2 init
(10:20:19 PM) Mask_de_GM: roll 1d20+2
(10:20:22 PM) Dicesaurus [aa@Nightstar-2ac2baf4.bois.qwest.net] entered the room.
(10:20:34 PM) Aria: roll 1d20+6 Init
(10:20:34 PM) Dicesaurus: Aria rolled 1d20+6 Init --> [ 1d20=14 ]{20}
(10:20:37 PM) Aria: There we go
(10:20:44 PM) Aria: Sorry about that
(10:20:47 PM) Mask_de_GM: roll 1d20+4
(10:20:48 PM) Dicesaurus: Mask_de_GM rolled 1d20+4 --> [ 1d20=17 ]{21}
(10:20:51 PM) Hypolita: roll 1d20+2 init
(10:20:52 PM) Dicesaurus: Hypolita rolled 1d20+2 init --> [ 1d20=18 ]{20}
(10:21:26 PM) Mask_de_GM: Well alright then
(10:21:27 PM) Aria: Hurrah for things working
(10:22:17 PM) Mask_de_GM: Top of the round, two of the girls? break formation and fly alongside Fluffy
(10:22:48 PM) ForValor [1811c2ad@Nightstar-4fab16c5.mibbit.com] entered the room.
(10:23:01 PM) Mask_de_GM: and begin to chant: barricades of force placed in a semi-circle in front of him
(10:23:22 PM) ***ForValor is here.
(10:23:37 PM) Mask_de_GM: {Cool, you're just in time to watch the group get attacked}
(10:23:56 PM) ForValor: {awesome. Am I there? Or do I get to watch?}
(10:24:06 PM) Mask_de_GM: {You get to watch}
(10:24:16 PM) Mask_de_GM: {We'll catch up with you on the island}
(10:24:23 PM) ForValor: {watching}
(10:24:31 PM) Aria: How many of them are there?
(10:24:34 PM) Mask_de_GM: The two girls in back spit into their hands, and lob some weird sticky material at Fluffy
(10:24:37 PM) Mask_de_GM: Five Aria
(10:24:59 PM) Mask_de_GM: AJ, what's your/Fluffy's Reflex?
(10:25:18 PM) Mask_de_GM: Nevermind, 13
(10:25:18 PM) Andrew_Jackson: Fluffy, I have no idea since he's just a fly speed/bar
(10:25:35 PM) Andrew_Jackson: roll 1d20+13 reflex
(10:25:35 PM) Dicesaurus: Andrew_Jackson rolled 1d20+13 reflex --> [ 1d20=16 ]{29}
(10:26:40 PM) Mask_de_GM: The sticky stuff goes sailing over your heads, as Fluffy makes a sharp dive
(10:27:52 PM) Mask_de_GM: The leader type says a few words ending with something that sounds suspiciously like Kage Bunshin no Jutsu
(10:28:03 PM) Mask_de_GM: roll 1d4
(10:28:04 PM) Dicesaurus: Mask_de_GM rolled 1d4 --> [ 1d4=1 ]{1}
(10:28:08 PM) Aria: Heh
(10:28:21 PM) Mask_de_GM: and splits into three versions of her
(10:28:29 PM) Mask_de_GM: Aria, Hypo, you're up
(10:29:17 PM) Aria: How many of them are within 40' of me?
(10:29:39 PM) Mask_de_GM: Everybody but the leader
(10:29:41 PM) Hypolita: are they within 60'?
(10:29:46 PM) Mask_de_GM: Yeah
(10:30:12 PM) Hypolita: Sand flows from a jar on Hypolita's waist, surrounding her with a miniature sandstorm, and she fires of a blast of fire from her hand at the leader
(10:30:28 PM) Aria: So with 20' of movement, could I be within 40' of them all?
(10:30:32 PM) Hypolita: roll 1d20+6 ranged touch for Eldritch Blast
(10:30:33 PM) Dicesaurus: Hypolita rolled 1d20+6 ranged touch for Eldritch Blast --> [ 1d20=12 ]{18}
(10:31:06 PM) Mask_de_GM: You'd fall away from the two flanking Fluffy Aria
(10:31:12 PM) Mask_de_GM: and roll damage Hypo
(10:31:29 PM) Hypolita: roll 6d6
(10:31:29 PM) Dicesaurus: Hypolita rolled 6d6 --> [ 6d6=17 ]{17}
(10:32:46 PM) Mask_de_GM: The sand rips through the fashionable accouterments of the leader and scours her deep to the bone
(10:33:06 PM) Mask_de_GM: Her bonnet falls off of all three versions, and they look at you with hatred in their eyes
(10:33:24 PM) Hypolita: (that was an eldritch blast, the sand was just my armour becoming active)
(10:33:45 PM) Aria: Alright. I'll bomb the four I'm near, then. Hit each for 6d6 (Ref half) primary, bounce to their partner for 3d6 (Ref half again) secondary.
(10:33:55 PM) Mask_de_GM: {Can you meet me halfway and say you fired molten glass at them?}
(10:33:59 PM) Aria: Total of 9d6 on each, two Ref saves. Or one if you don't want to roll that much.
(10:34:10 PM) Hypolita: (*laugh* yeah)
(10:34:36 PM) Aria: roll 9d6 Multishot bomb
(10:34:36 PM) Dicesaurus: Aria rolled 9d6 Multishot bomb --> [ 9d6=31 ]{31}
(10:35:05 PM) Mask_de_GM: roll 1d20+7
(10:35:05 PM) Dicesaurus: Mask_de_GM rolled 1d20+7 --> [ 1d20=8 ]{15}
(10:35:13 PM) Mask_de_GM: roll 1d20+7
(10:35:14 PM) Dicesaurus: Mask_de_GM rolled 1d20+7 --> [ 1d20=6 ]{13}
(10:35:25 PM) Aria: DC 19, by the by
(10:35:33 PM) Mask_de_GM: I know, I made the class :V
(10:35:42 PM) Mask_de_GM: 10+3+Cha Mod
(10:35:46 PM) Mask_de_GM: 6
(10:36:12 PM) Aria: Pfft, math. I don't believe in it.
(10:36:47 PM) Andrew_Jackson: does that make it my turn?
(10:36:50 PM) Mask_de_GM: Anyway, the blast rips through the flunkies like bullets through tissue paper and give me the 3d6
(10:37:14 PM) Mask_de_GM: first, the 3d6 Aria
(10:37:42 PM) Aria: roll 3d6 Secondary
(10:37:43 PM) Dicesaurus: Aria rolled 3d6 Secondary --> [ 3d6=11 ]{11}
(10:37:58 PM) Mask_de_GM: roll 1d20+7
(10:37:59 PM) Dicesaurus: Mask_de_GM rolled 1d20+7 --> [ 1d20=12 ]{19}
(10:38:04 PM) Mask_de_GM: roll 1d20+7
(10:38:05 PM) Dicesaurus: Mask_de_GM rolled 1d20+7 --> [ 1d20=4 ]{11}
(10:38:23 PM) Mask_de_GM: And the back two go down in flaming heaps
(10:38:40 PM) Aria: In a blinding barrage of colorful energy
(10:38:45 PM) Mask_de_GM: {Roll the primary and secondary damage separate next time please Aria.}
(10:38:48 PM) Mask_de_GM: damn straight
(10:38:51 PM) Aria: Will do
(10:39:10 PM) Mask_de_GM: The ones holding up the barrier manage to cling on to life by (well appointed) threads
(10:39:46 PM) Andrew_Jackson: any left for me to kill, and is it possible for me to use a full attack from my current position to attack two?
(10:40:06 PM) Andrew_Jackson: 20' reach and large size if it matters
(10:40:37 PM) Mask_de_GM: AJ, you can hit the two holding up the barricade yeah, but first, give me a Reflex save.
(10:40:48 PM) Andrew_Jackson: roll 1d20+13 reflex
(10:40:48 PM) Dicesaurus: Andrew_Jackson rolled 1d20+13 reflex --> [ 1d20=8 ]{21}
(10:40:58 PM) Mask_de_GM: Fuck, close
(10:41:19 PM) Andrew_Jackson: assuming I saved, it's smitan time
(10:41:44 PM) Andrew_Jackson: blitz, smiting, power attacking for full
(10:42:08 PM) Andrew_Jackson: roll 1d20+14 smite on first
(10:42:08 PM) Dicesaurus: Andrew_Jackson rolled 1d20+14 smite on first --> [ 1d20=1 ]{15}
(10:42:13 PM) Andrew_Jackson: faaaail
(10:42:14 PM) Aria: Ouch
(10:42:28 PM) Andrew_Jackson: second roll, no smite
(10:42:48 PM) Andrew_Jackson: roll 1d20+7
(10:42:48 PM) Dicesaurus: Andrew_Jackson rolled 1d20+7 --> [ 1d20=1 ]{8}
(10:42:51 PM) Andrew_Jackson: wiiiin
(10:43:09 PM) Mask_de_GM: You pass over the barricade by the narrowest of margins, and you would succeed on a 0 so your Kusari-gama falters, sputters, but takes the broomsticks out from underneath the two leading girls
(10:43:19 PM) Mask_de_GM: and they fall to their deaths
(10:43:54 PM) Mask_de_GM: The leader type looks incredibly nervous now
(10:45:36 PM) Mask_de_GM: And begins to beat tracks to your right
(10:45:42 PM) ForValor: {did uber just roll a 1 twice?}
(10:45:42 PM) Mask_de_GM: running as fast as she possibly can
(10:45:45 PM) Mask_de_GM: and yeah
(10:45:56 PM) Mask_de_GM: what do
(10:46:24 PM) Aria: Moved about how far?
(10:47:41 PM) Mask_de_GM: 90 feet
(10:47:53 PM) Hypolita: well, shit
(10:48:04 PM) Mask_de_GM: You are riding a flying bison...I mean centipede
(10:48:08 PM) Mask_de_GM: you can catch her
(10:48:12 PM) Aria: Excellent. I'll Greater Teleport 60' in front of her.
(10:48:20 PM) Hypolita: yeah, but I can't shoot her from here....
(10:48:24 PM) Aria: That consumes my standard, so I'll fold my arms and wait
(10:48:33 PM) Mask_de_GM: lol
(10:48:40 PM) Mask_de_GM: nice, AJ, you're up
(10:49:14 PM) Mask_de_GM: The leader stares at Aria in something between complete shock and abject horror
(10:49:57 PM) Andrew_Jackson: I delay because I am being awesome and helping a friend out
(10:50:41 PM) Mask_de_GM: Cool.
(10:51:16 PM) Andrew_Jackson: Dispel magic on the leader to make her fall to her death
(10:51:23 PM) Andrew_Jackson: roll 1d20+8 targetted dispel
(10:51:23 PM) Dicesaurus: Andrew_Jackson rolled 1d20+8 targetted dispel --> [ 1d20=4 ]{12}
(10:51:52 PM) Andrew_Jackson: god fucking damnit, these dice hate me tonight
(10:52:16 PM) Mask_de_GM: The leader gibbers some unkind things about Aria's mother and narrowly avoids the beam of magicide heading her way
(10:52:40 PM) Mask_de_GM: before pointing her finger at Aria and unleashing three blood-red stingers of force
(10:52:49 PM) Mask_de_GM: roll 3d6+4
(10:52:50 PM) Dicesaurus: Mask_de_GM rolled 3d6+4 --> [ 3d6=15 ]{19}
(10:53:04 PM) Aria: There a save on that?
(10:53:26 PM) Mask_de_GM: {Nope, Standard Special Shot type}
(10:53:33 PM) Mask_de_GM: {Magic Missile rule}
(10:53:38 PM) Aria: Ah, how fun
(10:53:55 PM) Hypolita: so did they move 90' or to "90' away"?
(10:54:02 PM) Aria: I'll respond in kind on my turn
(10:54:04 PM) Mask_de_GM: 90'
(10:54:10 PM) Hypolita: ok
(10:54:36 PM) Mask_de_GM: After the shot, she ducks down and pushes forward towards the island
(10:54:59 PM) Mask_de_GM: The wind picks up as she moves another 30'
(10:55:06 PM) Mask_de_GM: and Aria/Hypo, you're up
(10:56:37 PM) ***Aria crackles knuckles
(10:56:56 PM) Aria: roll 9d6+18 Standard Shot damage
(10:56:57 PM) Dicesaurus: Aria rolled 9d6+18 Standard Shot damage --> [ 9d6=34 ]{52}
(10:57:06 PM) Mask_de_GM: Hey Aria, odds or evens?
(10:57:09 PM) Aria: Evens
(10:57:13 PM) Mask_de_GM: roll 1d6
(10:57:14 PM) Dicesaurus: Mask_de_GM rolled 1d6 --> [ 1d6=5 ]{5}
(10:57:35 PM) ***Aria shakes fist at Dicesaurus
(10:57:44 PM) Mask_de_GM: Your colorful shots hit dead on target, and she falls out of the sky...only to disappear in a puff of smoke
(10:57:53 PM) Mask_de_GM: the two remaining copies of her flip you the bird
(10:58:03 PM) Mask_de_GM: Hypo, you're up
(10:58:27 PM) Hypolita: Hypolita is lifted by a disc of sand that forms under her feet and moves 120' towards the image of the leader she shot before
(10:58:34 PM) Hypolita: and can't attack again yet...
(10:58:54 PM) Aria: I'll take my move to port 30' fowards, by the by
(10:59:16 PM) Mask_de_GM: The leader(s) glance back at the new tail, gulp, then push forwards. If she can only get a little further...
(10:59:23 PM) Mask_de_GM: AJ, you're up
(11:00:16 PM) Andrew_Jackson: We're gunna try that greater dispel => fall to death one more time
(11:00:23 PM) Andrew_Jackson: roll 1d20+8 greater dispel
(11:00:23 PM) Dicesaurus: Andrew_Jackson rolled 1d20+8 greater dispel --> [ 1d20=19 ]{27}
(11:00:26 PM) Andrew_Jackson: success!
(11:00:48 PM) Mask_de_GM: Wait, targeted right?
(11:01:17 PM) Andrew_Jackson: yeah
(11:01:27 PM) Andrew_Jackson: I was kind of assuming 1 roll for all the buffs to save time
(11:02:03 PM) Mask_de_GM: In that case, odds or evens?
(11:02:16 PM) Mask_de_GM: or just say fuck it and area dispel
(11:02:21 PM) Mask_de_GM: instead
(11:02:35 PM) Mask_de_GM: you can hit with both at this range
(11:03:01 PM) Andrew_Jackson: evens
(11:03:05 PM) Mask_de_GM: roll 1d6
(11:03:06 PM) Dicesaurus: Mask_de_GM rolled 1d6 --> [ 1d6=2 ]{2}
(11:03:11 PM) Mask_de_GM: Never mind
(11:03:34 PM) Mask_de_GM: Your shot rings true, as one moment the girl-thing is riding a flying broom, the next she's riding a regular broom
(11:03:51 PM) Mask_de_GM: down goes the Cthouhoues
(11:03:59 PM) Mask_de_GM: *victory music*
(11:04:19 PM) Mask_de_GM: Gained 120 XP, found [ETHER]
(11:04:33 PM) Andrew_Jackson: Give it to the mage?
(11:04:43 PM) Andrew_Jackson: Also, who is the mage?
(11:04:54 PM) Mask_de_GM: Well, Aria is a Bullet Mage
(11:04:57 PM) Mask_de_GM: that's close enough I guess
(11:05:02 PM) Hypolita: I think in this group it's more like who isn't a mage
(11:05:08 PM) Mask_de_GM: or you could keep it for Sulu
(11:05:11 PM) Mask_de_GM: who's a Warmage
(11:05:28 PM) Aria: Sulu can have it
(11:05:58 PM) Mask_de_GM: Alright, Aria, Hypo, do you return to Fluffy or do you press forward?
(11:06:11 PM) Hypolita: return to fluffy
(11:06:15 PM) Aria: Ditto
(11:06:19 PM) Mask_de_GM: the wind around you is starting to kick up much harder that it was before the BM died
(11:06:26 PM) Mask_de_GM: but fuck it, you return to Fluffy
(11:06:40 PM) Mask_de_GM: and close in on the island.
(11:07:15 PM) Mask_de_GM: It seems that there was a small welcoming party for you ready, but only a few thralls are at their posts
(11:07:25 PM) Mask_de_GM: You can wing them with a well-placed shot
(11:07:28 PM) Mask_de_GM: or two
(11:07:51 PM) Mask_de_GM: or you could fly around and land somewhere else
(11:07:52 PM) Aria: I'm not sure there is anything such as a poorly placed shot with magic missile mechanics
(11:08:07 PM) Mask_de_GM: tis true, but you're the only one with that ability
(11:08:36 PM) Hypolita: what are the thralls? race wise, I mean
(11:08:48 PM) Andrew_Jackson: Can I smite?
(11:09:23 PM) Andrew_Jackson: uber noob is currenlty more uber, friend Bonnie is playing
(11:09:56 PM) Aria: Relatively unimportant, but does it take us at least a minute to reach the tower at Fluffy-speed?
(11:10:02 PM) Aria: Also, hello Bonnie
(11:10:14 PM) Andrew_Jackson: Hello
(11:10:16 PM) Andrew_Jackson: all
(11:11:07 PM) Hypolita: hi
(11:11:30 PM) Mask_de_GM: Sup Bonnie
(11:11:42 PM) Mask_de_GM: and yeah, you'll get there in under a minute Aria
(11:11:44 PM) Andrew_Jackson: Just chilling and helping my bf with his english hw
(11:11:51 PM) Mask_de_GM: cool
(11:12:08 PM) Mask_de_GM: And Andrew Jackson can't hit them from this range
(11:12:13 PM) Andrew_Jackson: kk
(11:12:18 PM) Andrew_Jackson: get closer?
(11:12:29 PM) Hypolita: what about my eldritch blast?
(11:12:31 PM) Mask_de_GM: Aria, Hypo, you can actually wing them from here
(11:12:42 PM) Mask_de_GM: or do you want to close and get Dynasty Warriors on some motherfuckers
(11:13:16 PM) Hypolita: well, hell, Aria and I can hit 'em now, and then we move closer and hit 'em again
(11:13:24 PM) Aria: Wing 'em
(11:14:29 PM) Andrew_Jackson: Yes, ass kicking comence
(11:14:30 PM) Mask_de_GM: Alright, so Aria unloads some machine gun sparkles at the mooks and they go down like dogs
(11:14:59 PM) Hypolita: I throw eldritch blasts and hit and damage likely don't matter with the machine gun sparkles
(11:15:05 PM) Mask_de_GM: Hypolytia leans out the side and takes out a few herself
(11:15:17 PM) Andrew_Jackson: can I do things now?
(11:15:45 PM) Mask_de_GM: One with a mauve shirt makes it down to another command post, and here comes company
(11:15:51 PM) Aria: Blasts of magical fire go perfectly with magic sparkles, Hypo. We're a fireworks display all by ourselves.
(11:16:18 PM) Mask_de_GM: And yeah Bonnie Jackson, you can fly, so you can charge out to greet the living wind monsters
(11:16:19 PM) Hypolita: a painful, deadly fireworks show
(11:16:26 PM) Mask_de_GM: with extreme prejudice
(11:16:34 PM) Andrew_Jackson: Yes! So I fly out and smite?
(11:16:40 PM) Mask_de_GM: Knock yourself out
(11:16:47 PM) Andrew_Jackson: K, I do that
(11:17:16 PM) Mask_de_GM: Charging smite, coming right up
(11:17:20 PM) Mask_de_GM: gimme an attack roll
(11:17:39 PM) Andrew_Jackson: roll 1d20+16 smite
(11:17:39 PM) Dicesaurus: Andrew_Jackson rolled 1d20+16 smite --> [ 1d20=7 ]{23}
(11:18:08 PM) Mask_de_GM: That's a hit
(11:18:10 PM) Mask_de_GM: roll damage
(11:18:10 PM) Dicesaurus: Mask_de_GM rolled damage --> error: malformed expression
(11:18:15 PM) Mask_de_GM: :T
(11:18:20 PM) Andrew_Jackson: roll 1d8+28
(11:18:20 PM) Dicesaurus: Andrew_Jackson rolled 1d8+28 --> [ 1d8=4 ]{32}
(11:18:26 PM) Andrew_Jackson: and 23 hp or less it dies
(11:18:33 PM) Andrew_Jackson: if it lives, save vs slow
(11:19:39 PM) Mask_de_GM: Andrew Jackson flies out to greet the head elemental with a chain around it's neck and a Kusari-gama blade to the face
(11:19:53 PM) Mask_de_GM: roll 1d20+2
(11:19:53 PM) Dicesaurus: Mask_de_GM rolled 1d20+2 --> [ 1d20=1 ]{3}
(11:20:06 PM) Aria: Init time?
(11:20:07 PM) Mask_de_GM: and immediately slows to a crawl, as he gets on top of it
(11:20:20 PM) Mask_de_GM: Not yet, everybody gets a shot
(11:20:25 PM) Mask_de_GM: surprise round
(11:20:42 PM) Mask_de_GM: roll 1d4
(11:20:42 PM) Dicesaurus: Mask_de_GM rolled 1d4 --> [ 1d4=2 ]{2}
(11:21:19 PM) Mask_de_GM: Everybody gets a +2 morale bonus for the next round because that was tits
(11:21:28 PM) Mask_de_GM: so gogogo
(11:21:56 PM) Aria: Right. I'll blast one that Andrew hasn't slowed. +2 attack doesn't matter, but they can eat magical sparks anyways!
(11:22:00 PM) Aria: roll 9d6+18 Standard Shot damage
(11:22:00 PM) Dicesaurus: Aria rolled 9d6+18 Standard Shot damage --> [ 9d6=35 ]{53}
(11:22:18 PM) Hypolita: roll 1d20+6 ranged touch eldritch blast
(11:22:18 PM) Dicesaurus: Hypolita rolled 1d20+6 ranged touch eldritch blast --> [ 1d20=15 ]{21}
(11:22:26 PM) Hypolita: roll 6d6 damage
(11:22:27 PM) Dicesaurus: Hypolita rolled 6d6 damage --> [ 6d6=26 ]{26}
(11:23:06 PM) Mask_de_GM: The deadly fireworks display continues, as some smaller elementals burst apart at the seams from the ordinance
(11:23:34 PM) Mask_de_GM: One though, sizzles with magical energy; hurting but alive
(11:23:39 PM) Mask_de_GM: and now give me initiative
(11:23:43 PM) Mask_de_GM: roll 1d20+11
(11:23:44 PM) Dicesaurus: Mask_de_GM rolled 1d20+11 --> [ 1d20=16 ]{27}
(11:23:48 PM) Aria: roll 1d20+6 Initiative roll
(11:23:48 PM) Dicesaurus: Aria rolled 1d20+6 Initiative roll --> [ 1d20=19 ]{25}
(11:23:54 PM) Hypolita: roll 1d20+2
(11:23:54 PM) Dicesaurus: Hypolita rolled 1d20+2 --> [ 1d20=11 ]{13}
(11:25:03 PM) Mask_de_GM: AJ, Init roll please
(11:25:27 PM) Andrew_Jackson_ [NSwebIRC@A2BA3E.CCFB1E.8240C8.13625D] entered the room.
(11:25:31 PM) Mask_de_GM: wat
(11:25:41 PM) Andrew_Jackson_: my client froze up
(11:25:55 PM) Andrew_Jackson_: here now
(11:25:59 PM) Andrew_Jackson_: roll 1d20+1 init
(11:26:00 PM) Dicesaurus: Andrew_Jackson_ rolled 1d20+1 init --> [ 1d20=7 ]{8}
(11:26:26 PM) Mask_de_GM: {That's the exact same order as last time :V}
(11:26:38 PM) Andrew_Jackson left the room (quit: Ping timeout: 121 seconds).
(11:27:22 PM) Andrew_Jackson_: I'm so good at this initiative thing
(11:28:06 PM) Mask_de_GM: The slowed elemental pops and reforms itself as a great {yet oddly slow} maelstrom of whirling force
(11:28:28 PM) Mask_de_GM: Aaaand give me a reflex save AJ
(11:28:51 PM) Andrew_Jackson_: Mask, you and your mother fucking reflex saves
(11:28:55 PM) Mask_de_GM: lol
(11:28:58 PM) Andrew_Jackson_: I swear to god, everything has to target my weak save
(11:29:00 PM) Andrew_Jackson_: not fair
(11:29:05 PM) Mask_de_GM: You've got a fucking 13
(11:29:05 PM) Andrew_Jackson_: roll 1d20+13 reflex
(11:29:05 PM) Dicesaurus: Andrew_Jackson_ rolled 1d20+13 reflex --> [ 1d20=15 ]{28}
(11:29:07 PM) Mask_de_GM: you'll be fine
(11:29:29 PM) Mask_de_GM: And you manage to wring the neck of another elemental, swinging out of the storm Indiana Jones style
(11:29:35 PM) Andrew_Jackson_: Fine? You're targetting my one save that isn't completely off the RNG. I like, risk damage or something.
(11:29:39 PM) Mask_de_GM: lololol
(11:30:54 PM) Mask_de_GM: Meanwhile, the other elementals rush forwards to meet Fluffy and company, attempting to ram the beleaguered centipede
(11:31:03 PM) Mask_de_GM: roll 1d20+6
(11:31:03 PM) Dicesaurus: Mask_de_GM rolled 1d20+6 --> [ 1d20=17 ]{23}
(11:31:26 PM) Mask_de_GM: Yet cannot shake his mighty hide
(11:31:34 PM) Mask_de_GM: The bar gets sloshed around some though, which sucks
(11:32:00 PM) Mask_de_GM: The Air elementals are to your back, about 50' out. Aria, you're up
(11:32:24 PM) Hypolita: "The booze! You airy bastards!"
(11:32:26 PM) Mask_de_GM: not counting the whirlwind, there's two of them.
(11:32:47 PM) Aria: I'll hit an uninjured one with more sparks
(11:32:48 PM) Aria: roll 9d6+18 Standard Shot damage
(11:32:48 PM) Dicesaurus: Aria rolled 9d6+18 Standard Shot damage --> [ 9d6=36 ]{54}
(11:33:26 PM) Mask_de_GM: You riddle the uninjured one with magical bullets, and it starts leaking wind, if that makes any sense
(11:33:37 PM) Mask_de_GM: A great wispy scream reverberates in your ears
(11:33:56 PM) Mask_de_GM: {Fuck, Special Standard is really good}
(11:34:03 PM) Aria: (It really is)
(11:34:06 PM) Mask_de_GM: {I may have to fix that}
(11:34:13 PM) Mask_de_GM: Hypo, you're up
(11:34:15 PM) Aria: (Though not as crazy as MAX sticky)
(11:35:08 PM) Mask_de_GM: {MAX Sticky is supposed to be crazy though. They all are, but the level of crazy might not be equal for each}
(11:35:40 PM) Mask_de_GM: Also, Hypo, do something
(11:35:45 PM) Mask_de_GM: if you're still here
(11:35:59 PM) Hypolita: Hypolita launches an eldritch blast at the last elemental
(11:36:07 PM) Hypolita: roll 1d20+6 ranged touch
(11:36:07 PM) Dicesaurus: Hypolita rolled 1d20+6 ranged touch --> [ 1d20=13 ]{19}
(11:36:16 PM) Hypolita: roll 6d6 damage
(11:36:17 PM) Dicesaurus: Hypolita rolled 6d6 damage --> [ 6d6=21 ]{21}
(11:37:15 PM) Mask_de_GM: The fresher Air elemental gets a burning sensation in it's everywhere, but not quite bad enough to take it down. It joins its brother in a chorus of howls
(11:37:19 PM) Mask_de_GM: and AJ, you're up
(11:37:32 PM) Mask_de_GM: and on the neck of the one Hypo just hit
(11:37:40 PM) Andrew_Jackson_: How many left to flail wildly at?
(11:37:57 PM) Mask_de_GM: The one you're on, and the one within 20'
(11:38:08 PM) Andrew_Jackson_: Well, I'll just flail on the one I'm on then
(11:38:12 PM) Andrew_Jackson_: Full attack, blitz
(11:38:26 PM) Mask_de_GM: You can drop off as a 5ft step and Full Attack both
(11:38:35 PM) Andrew_Jackson_: sweet
(11:38:42 PM) Mask_de_GM: roll dem bones
(11:38:42 PM) Dicesaurus: Mask_de_GM rolled dem bones --> error: malformed expression
(11:38:45 PM) Andrew_Jackson_: we're going to pretend that I remembered to cast divine favor last round
(11:38:50 PM) Mask_de_GM: eh
(11:39:01 PM) Andrew_Jackson_: roll 1d20+11
(11:39:02 PM) Dicesaurus: Andrew_Jackson_ rolled 1d20+11 --> [ 1d20=3 ]{14}
(11:39:06 PM) Andrew_Jackson_: roll 1d20+9
(11:39:06 PM) Dicesaurus: Andrew_Jackson_ rolled 1d20+9 --> [ 1d20=2 ]{11}
(11:39:18 PM) Mask_de_GM: Holy shit you missed?
(11:39:21 PM) Mask_de_GM: :V
(11:39:25 PM) Andrew_Jackson_: I may have been power attacking for full
(11:39:30 PM) Andrew_Jackson_: and not smiting
(11:39:32 PM) Andrew_Jackson_: it's on cooldown
(11:39:34 PM) Aria: And you rolled a 2 and a 3
(11:39:39 PM) Andrew_Jackson_: well, that
(11:39:39 PM) Aria: Your luck is astounding
(11:39:42 PM) Mask_de_GM: jesus
(11:40:23 PM) Mask_de_GM: You drop off of the elemental, but the unstable wind currents mess with your aim: trying to air out your wings leaves you with less time to place the blades
(11:40:35 PM) Mask_de_GM: You swear you hear your Kusari-gama growl at you
(11:40:41 PM) Mask_de_GM: but it might have been the wind
(11:40:48 PM) Andrew_Jackson_: probably the wind
(11:40:54 PM) Andrew_Jackson_: We got rid of the talking weaponry
(11:41:03 PM) Mask_de_GM: :V
(11:41:34 PM) Mask_de_GM: Your misstep places you right smack dab in the middle of two very hurt, and very unhappy air elementals
(11:41:36 PM) Mask_de_GM: who
(11:41:47 PM) Mask_de_GM: roll 1d20+12
(11:41:47 PM) Dicesaurus: Mask_de_GM rolled 1d20+12 --> [ 1d20=5 ]{17}
(11:41:52 PM) Mask_de_GM: roll 1d20+12
(11:41:53 PM) Dicesaurus: Mask_de_GM rolled 1d20+12 --> [ 1d20=4 ]{16}
(11:42:08 PM) Mask_de_GM: bounce you between them, but can't find purchase on any fleshy bits
(11:42:29 PM) Mask_de_GM: it makes you a little sick, but not much else
(11:42:35 PM) Mask_de_GM: Aria, blast these fuckers
(11:42:40 PM) Aria: Yessir!
(11:42:41 PM) Aria: roll 9d6+18 Standard Shot damage
(11:42:41 PM) Dicesaurus: Aria rolled 9d6+18 Standard Shot damage --> [ 9d6=25 ]{43}
(11:42:47 PM) Andrew_Jackson_: Also, blast me too so I can roll another reflex save
(11:42:55 PM) Mask_de_GM: Split the bullets?
(11:43:03 PM) Aria: Hm
(11:43:06 PM) Andrew_Jackson_: no fireballz?
(11:43:07 PM) Aria: Probably a good idea
(11:43:14 PM) Aria: Let's hit the big guy with two, and the small with one
(11:43:23 PM) Aria: roll 6d6+12 Big guy
(11:43:23 PM) Dicesaurus: Aria rolled 6d6+12 Big guy --> [ 6d6=20 ]{32}
(11:43:29 PM) Aria: roll 3d6+6 Small guy
(11:43:29 PM) Dicesaurus: Aria rolled 3d6+6 Small guy --> [ 3d6=7 ]{13}
(11:44:47 PM) Mask_de_GM: Your blasts rip both elementals to the oxygen equivalent of bloody chunks, which blasts Andrew Jackson facefirst into the bar where he lands arse over tit behind the counter
(11:45:29 PM) Mask_de_GM: Fluffy touches down safely, and the final elemental creeps up from behind all scary like before ForValor's character takes it out in the most badass way he can think of right now
(11:45:35 PM) Mask_de_GM: {and that's your cue FV}
(11:46:01 PM) Mask_de_GM: {if you're still here of course}
(11:46:45 PM) Hypolita: (If not, Hypolita throws another eldritch blast at the last elemental)
(11:46:49 PM) Mask_de_GM: {Well alright then}
(11:47:11 PM) Mask_de_GM: Hypo sets it aflame without even looking back.
(11:47:12 PM) ***Aria flips hair over shoulder nonchalantly.
(11:47:21 PM) Aria: "Could have sworn I felt a breeze there"
(11:48:11 PM) Hypolita: Hypolita picks up a bottle of ale as it rolls by from AJ crashing into the bar
(11:48:43 PM) Andrew_Jackson_: *cries at all the spilled booze*
(11:49:18 PM) Mask_de_GM: You touch down on the island: there are stone command posts every 300' apart as far as you can see. There's a lush jungle forest ahead of you, and the brain tower juts out over top; smack dab in the center
(11:49:52 PM) Mask_de_GM: to your left there's a reef filled with jagged spires of wicked looking something or other.
(11:50:18 PM) Mask_de_GM: There are mook corpses strewn about the beach, white sand dyed crimson
(11:50:24 PM) Mask_de_GM: what do
(11:50:28 PM) Andrew_Jackson_: "Rush blindly straight ahead?"
(11:50:46 PM) Hypolita: Hypolita drops into a martial stance and gestures at whatever door leads into the tavern, sending a 20' pillar of stone straight up through the tower's front wall
(11:50:56 PM) Hypolita: *tower, not tavern
(11:51:55 PM) Mask_de_GM: "Well, that was a neat trick and all, but you still have to brave the Jungle of Fear to get to our tower, nyahahaha~"
(11:52:13 PM) Mask_de_GM: snarks the voice in both Aria and Hypolita's minds
(11:52:26 PM) Mask_de_GM: AJ hears nothing, because Magic Circle against Evil is awesome like that
(11:52:29 PM) Hypolita: huh, thought we were right in front of it...
(11:52:42 PM) Hypolita: welp, how tall are the trees of this forest?
(11:53:04 PM) Mask_de_GM: Can I just say very, but not too tall that you can fly over them?
(11:53:09 PM) Mask_de_GM: *can't?
(11:53:22 PM) Hypolita: that's pretty much what I was looking for
(11:53:28 PM) Mask_de_GM: cool
(11:53:39 PM) Mask_de_GM: Is Fluffy coming with?
(11:53:47 PM) Andrew_Jackson_: be back in ten, NPC me for now
(11:53:52 PM) Mask_de_GM: gotcha
(11:53:52 PM) Andrew_Jackson_ left the room (quit: [NS] Quit: Page closed).
(11:54:17 PM) Hypolita: I'm going to grab more tea real quick, back in a mo
(11:54:24 PM) Aria: Does Andrew have flight apart from Fluffy?
(11:54:49 PM) Mask_de_GM: Yeah, he's Dragonborn
(11:54:59 PM) Mask_de_GM: so
(11:55:02 PM) Mask_de_GM: [Game Paused]
(11:55:31 PM) Aria: No sense risking the blessed booze - we'll leave the centipede behind
(11:55:45 PM) Aria: And as long as everybody is doing something, I'll grab some ice cream
(11:56:52 PM) Hypolita: back when everyone else is
(11:56:59 PM) Hypolita: ...wish I had ice cream...
(11:58:07 PM) Aria: Delicious mint
(11:58:50 PM) Mask_de_GM: I'm gonna go fap to deviant por...I mean go fuck around on 4chan or something
(11:58:52 PM) Mask_de_GM: ...yeah
(11:59:16 PM) Hypolita: well don't fap to anything I wouldn't
(8/4/2010 12:01:51 AM) Mask_de_GM: But I don't know what you fap to
(12:02:18 AM) Hypolita: well, it actually gives you a fairly wide berth
(12:02:28 AM) Hypolita: though 4chan makes it a bit of a challenge
(12:03:30 AM) Mask_de_GM: Why does that worry me?
(12:04:41 AM) Hypolita: because as long as it'd be legal in real life I ain't too picky?
(12:06:09 AM) Mask_de_GM: Well alright then
(12:06:15 AM) Mask_de_GM: I can abide by that I guess
(12:06:29 AM) NSJavaGuest-9912 [nsJChat@Nightstar-836fd87b.fios.verizon.net] entered the room.
(12:06:35 AM) NSJavaGuest-9912 is now known as Andrew_Jackson
(12:06:44 AM) Andrew_Jackson: Sorry about that folks
(12:06:45 AM) Andrew_Jackson: did I miss anything?
(12:07:15 AM) Aria: Nope - we took a short break
(12:07:16 AM) Hypolita: yeah koumei got on for five minutes and linked us to video of her masturbating
(12:07:23 AM) Aria: And that <_< >_>
(12:07:40 AM) Aria: (You weren't supposed to tell him about that)
(12:07:46 AM) Andrew_Jackson: I always assumed Koumei was fat, so I guess I didn't miss anything
(12:08:00 AM) Hypolita: hey, I'm still stunned she could get her legs behind her head like that
(12:08:16 AM) Hypolita: you must not have seen her photo back when the den had a photo thread
(12:08:58 AM) Mask_de_GM: lolol
(12:09:25 AM) Mask_de_GM: Alright, now that we've hit our pervert quota for the evening, let's get on with the show
(12:09:44 AM) Mask_de_GM: so, you're gonna fly now, right?
(12:09:56 AM) Hypolita: that's what I was figuring on.
(12:10:11 AM) Andrew_Jackson: sounds like a plan
(12:10:11 AM) Hypolita: unless you're going with "kill every mook, servant and dog" xp
(12:10:18 AM) Mask_de_GM: That works for me
(12:11:06 AM) Mask_de_GM: so [FLIGHT] or [FIGHT] ladies and gentlemen?
(12:11:23 AM) Aria: [FLIGHT]
(12:11:27 AM) Hypolita: ...how dry is that forest?
(12:11:40 AM) Mask_de_GM: Not very, why?
(12:11:52 AM) Mask_de_GM: oh
(12:11:54 AM) Hypolita: damn, I was thinking I could just fire a few eldritch blasts in
(12:12:05 AM) Mask_de_GM: you're welcome to try setting the whole place ablaze
(12:12:09 AM) Mask_de_GM: actually, go for it
(12:13:22 AM) Mask_de_GM: so?
(12:13:22 AM) Hypolita: Hypolita fires a few eldritch blasts and hellfire blasts into the forest, waiting for the trees to catch on fire before flying up with her armour. "What was it you were saying about having to get through the forest, calimari?"
(12:13:51 AM) Mask_de_GM: hold up, let me roll some dice for shits and giggles
(12:14:01 AM) Mask_de_GM: roll 1d100
(12:14:02 AM) Dicesaurus: Mask_de_GM rolled 1d100 --> [ 1d100=64 ]{64}
(12:15:04 AM) Mask_de_GM: Your little act of arson manages to catch quite a few trees ablaze, which spreads from canopy to canopy, quickly blotting out the sun with choking smoke
(12:15:20 AM) Mask_de_GM: "W-what are you doing? This is madness!"
(12:15:27 AM) Andrew_Jackson: unrelated, I have aquired liquor at long last. This game just got better
(12:15:33 AM) Andrew_Jackson: "This is sparta!"
(12:15:34 AM) Mask_de_GM: awwww yeaaah
(12:15:58 AM) Aria: "Looks like the 'Forest of Fear' is getting a taste of its own medicine"
(12:16:05 AM) Mask_de_GM: "Tell the glowing one that no, this is a major environmental hazard, dimwit>"
(12:16:06 AM) Hypolita: Hypolita cracks up, "Clearly you've never dealt with the Vashar before. Just be glad I'm not close enough to share my culture"
(12:16:15 AM) Mask_de_GM: the voice bellows to those who can hear it
(12:17:07 AM) Mask_de_GM: As you fly through the smoke, you find it harder and harder to discern where you are or where your going
(12:17:16 AM) Mask_de_GM: It seems to go on vertically for ages
(12:17:27 AM) Mask_de_GM: Getting heavier and heavier
(12:17:44 AM) Mask_de_GM: as if it had its own gravitational pull
(12:17:48 AM) Hypolita: "huh. maybe that wasn't such a great idea."
(12:17:59 AM) Mask_de_GM: "Gee, you think?"
(12:18:29 AM) Hypolita: "Hey, you're the one that taunted a fire throwing half orc with kindling"
(12:18:43 AM) Mask_de_GM: Little black clumps of smoke and shadow start to affix themselves to you
(12:19:00 AM) Mask_de_GM: sticking to you like infernal bird shit
(12:19:21 AM) Mask_de_GM: It doesn't feel all too pleasant and you begin to slow down some
(12:19:57 AM) Hypolita: kn the planes check?
(12:20:19 AM) Mask_de_GM: Go for it
(12:20:32 AM) Hypolita: roll 1d20+7
(12:20:33 AM) Dicesaurus: Hypolita rolled 1d20+7 --> [ 1d20=20 ]{27}
(12:21:16 AM) Mask_de_GM: Apparently there was some sort of reaction between energies most foul and whatever gave the Jungle of Fear its name. And it's creating some nasty semi-sentient smokestuff that wishes to make you a part of it
(12:21:47 AM) Hypolita: "Hmm... the smokes actively trying to kill us or something..."
(12:22:02 AM) Aria: "Any way to ward it off or kill it?"
(12:22:03 AM) Mask_de_GM: What do
(12:22:16 AM) Mask_de_GM: Shooting seems to have worked so far
(12:22:32 AM) ForValor: blast it with fire?
(12:22:32 AM) Aria: Well, we'll try that then
(12:22:40 AM) Aria: Time to shoot the darkness with magic missiles
(12:22:46 AM) Hypolita: "Well, I was thinking of trying the opposite track, ie, burrowing, but..."
(12:23:03 AM) Mask_de_GM: So, [FIGHT] [BURROW] [GENUFLECT]?
(12:23:13 AM) Hypolita: Hypolita fires a hellfire blast at the smoke
(12:23:19 AM) Aria: roll 9d6+18 Standard Shot damage
(12:23:19 AM) Dicesaurus: Aria rolled 9d6+18 Standard Shot damage --> [ 9d6=40 ]{58}
(12:23:19 AM) Hypolita: roll 1d20+6
(12:23:19 AM) Dicesaurus: Hypolita rolled 1d20+6 --> [ 1d20=16 ]{22}
(12:23:33 AM) Hypolita: roll 4d6
(12:23:34 AM) Dicesaurus: Hypolita rolled 4d6 --> [ 4d6=17 ]{17}
(12:24:02 AM) Mask_de_GM: The blasts of magical energy rip through the smoke, giving the tiniest glimmer of sunlight right before they dissipate
(12:24:27 AM) Mask_de_GM: However, the hellfire gets blackened and subsumed by the smoke, leading more of it to Hypolita's location
(12:24:49 AM) Mask_de_GM: the splotches come hot and heavy and give me a Fort save Hypo
(12:24:55 AM) Hypolita: "Ok, so that didn't work..."
(12:25:08 AM) Hypolita: roll 1d20+5 fort
(12:25:08 AM) Dicesaurus: Hypolita rolled 1d20+5 fort --> [ 1d20=18 ]{23}
(12:25:25 AM) Mask_de_GM: It spreads across her face, but does little more than sting a little
(12:25:33 AM) Mask_de_GM: AJ, other guy, what do?
(12:26:13 AM) Andrew_Jackson: Fuck it, it can't catch me, I'm the gingerbread man.
(12:26:32 AM) Mask_de_GM: so full holy countenance time?
(12:26:38 AM) Andrew_Jackson: yeah
(12:27:19 AM) Mask_de_GM: Andrew glows like a miniature sun, yelling "You can't catch me, I'm the gingerbread man." in open challenge of the smoke
(12:27:43 AM) Mask_de_GM: Parts of it sizzle and die away, ripping open a small bubble of protection around him
(12:28:07 AM) Mask_de_GM: it redoubles it's efforts; clashing and lashing against the holy icon
(12:28:17 AM) Mask_de_GM: FV, what do?
(12:28:51 AM) Mask_de_GM: FV?
(12:28:55 AM) Mask_de_GM: Bueller?
(12:28:58 AM) Mask_de_GM: Anybody?
(12:29:04 AM) ForValor: charge
(12:29:11 AM) Mask_de_GM: charge what?
(12:29:18 AM) ForValor: through the smoke, following AJ
(12:29:25 AM) ForValor: fuck if I can do anything
(12:30:23 AM) Mask_de_GM: Well, the shadows are your bag
(12:30:29 AM) Mask_de_GM: and this is at least partially shadow
(12:30:43 AM) Mask_de_GM: but whatevs, give me a Reflex save
(12:30:59 AM) Andrew_Jackson: me, or FV?
(12:31:04 AM) Mask_de_GM: FV
(12:31:44 AM) ForValor: roll 1d20+4
(12:31:44 AM) Dicesaurus: ForValor rolled 1d20+4 --> [ 1d20=19 ]{23}
(12:31:48 AM) ForValor: bitch
(12:32:21 AM) Mask_de_GM: The slipstream that AJ kicks up does little to deter you, as your powers over shadow cause the tendrils to bend and weave away
(12:32:56 AM) ForValor: do you guys think it's sentient?
(12:33:15 AM) Mask_de_GM: So: Aria saw her shots go out at the very edge of her range, Hellfire makes it angry, and you can't fucking touch the gingerbread man
(12:33:19 AM) Mask_de_GM: and that makes it angry
(12:33:22 AM) Mask_de_GM: so what do
(12:33:42 AM) Andrew_Jackson: @FV: Don't care, I'm the gingerbread man
(12:33:46 AM) Hypolita: "given that it's smoke, caused by a conflux of foul energies to be trying to kill us? yes, I think it's sentient"
(12:33:57 AM) Hypolita: Hypolita pulls her knife and starts shanking shadow blotches for lack of any other idea at the moment
(12:34:12 AM) Aria: "Anybody have Gust of Wind? No? Well, damn..."
(12:34:16 AM) Aria: I'll slap on Crown of Flames
(12:34:17 AM) ForValor: "then why not try to communicate with it? I mean, I'm at a loss here... but has anyone got telepathy?"
(12:34:28 AM) Aria: No telepathy, but I do have Tongues
(12:34:39 AM) ForValor: try talking to it...?
(12:34:57 AM) Hypolita: "um... <Go AWAY!>" Hypolita says, switching to Infernal to address the smoke
(12:35:31 AM) Hypolita: "<habla abyssal?>"
(12:35:52 AM) ForValor: how far away is the gingerbread man at this point?
(12:36:13 AM) Andrew_Jackson: Umm, I move at like 30' per move action, so not very
(12:36:29 AM) Mask_de_GM: The gingerbread man is 30' away, and it's getting hard to see him
(12:36:37 AM) ForValor: oh, great...
(12:36:48 AM) ForValor: "Hey, Gingerbread man! Get the fuck back here!"
(12:36:57 AM) ForValor: to the smoke:
(12:37:05 AM) Mask_de_GM: <-------I------>
(12:37:11 AM) Hypolita: "<sprechen se Orc?">
(12:37:19 AM) Mask_de_GM: <-----I h------>
(12:37:31 AM) Andrew_Jackson: "Fuck you! I'm the gingerbread man!"
(12:37:33 AM) Mask_de_GM: <-----hElP------>
(12:37:50 AM) ForValor: "If you can hear me, please let me apologize for hypolita. She didn't mean to anger you. She was being reckless--WHAT?"
(12:37:57 AM) Hypolita: <"How?">
(12:37:58 AM) Aria: "What do you need? We will try to help you if we can!"
(12:38:07 AM) Mask_de_GM: <---hUrTs--->
(12:38:19 AM) Mask_de_GM: <G---g-g-g--->
(12:38:44 AM) ForValor: yikes...
(12:38:48 AM) Mask_de_GM: The smoke gets heavier, compacting in ways smoke really shouldn't
(12:38:57 AM) Mask_de_GM: everybody, it's time to make Uber's favorite save
(12:39:00 AM) ForValor: "Do you think a dispel might have any effect?"
(12:39:05 AM) Aria: roll 1d20+10 Ref save
(12:39:05 AM) Dicesaurus: Aria rolled 1d20+10 Ref save --> [ 1d20=8 ]{18}
(12:39:26 AM) Hypolita: roll 1d20+7 ref
(12:39:27 AM) Dicesaurus: Hypolita rolled 1d20+7 ref --> [ 1d20=5 ]{12}
(12:39:34 AM) ForValor: roll 1d20+4 Ref
(12:39:34 AM) Dicesaurus: ForValor rolled 1d20+4 Ref --> [ 1d20=8 ]{12}
(12:40:09 AM) Mask_de_GM: AJ, ref save plz
(12:40:16 AM) Andrew_Jackson: roll 1d20+13 ref
(12:40:17 AM) Dicesaurus: Andrew_Jackson rolled 1d20+13 ref --> [ 1d20=20 ]{33}
(12:40:21 AM) Andrew_Jackson: owned
(12:40:32 AM) Hypolita: damned gingerbread men
(12:40:35 AM) ForValor: goddomot Ondrow Jockson
(12:40:41 AM) Mask_de_GM: The power is too much for everyone but the gingerbread man, who rockets forth with renewed vigor
(12:41:05 AM) Mask_de_GM: The smoke hardens into a block of pure nothing as the faint light fades away
(12:41:17 AM) Mask_de_GM: <-s-S-t-TOP
(12:41:25 AM) Mask_de_GM: <STO---P>
(12:41:37 AM) Hypolita: "Oh fucking gruumsh's semen soaked eye hole!"
(12:41:41 AM) Mask_de_GM: <lLlLlLIGHT>
(12:41:48 AM) Mask_de_GM: <LIGHT---HURTS>
(12:41:55 AM) Aria: *coughhackcough* "TURN OFF THE LIGHT, ANDREW"
(12:42:17 AM) Mask_de_GM: Your cries fall on deaf ears
(12:42:31 AM) Andrew_Jackson: "Fuck you, I'm the gingerbread man!"
(12:42:41 AM) Andrew_Jackson: (really, I'm just gunna gingerbread my way through this)
(12:42:42 AM) Hypolita: "fuck. fuckfuckfuck. Hey Slim, you've got shadow powers, right?" Hypolita shouts to <Valor's character>
(12:42:48 AM) Mask_de_GM: as even if you weren't in the box of nothing, yeah, he's pretty much sold on being the gingerbread man
(12:43:20 AM) ForValor: "My "shadow powers" confine themselves to -*coughing*- shooting ice and making people go blind"
(12:43:50 AM) Mask_de_GM: The shadow looses an unholy scream as tears of nothing rain down upon AJ
(12:43:54 AM) Mask_de_GM: Fort Save plz
(12:43:56 AM) ForValor: "ANDREW! SHUT THE DAMN LIGHT OFF!! I don't want to deal with this shit!!"
(12:44:00 AM) Hypolita: "damnit Shadey!"
(12:44:14 AM) ForValor: "you're a fucking riot, warlock"
(12:44:18 AM) Andrew_Jackson: roll 1d20+17 fort
(12:44:18 AM) Dicesaurus: Andrew_Jackson rolled 1d20+17 fort --> [ 1d20=16 ]{33}
(12:44:26 AM) ForValor: roll 1d20+8 fort save
(12:44:27 AM) Dicesaurus: ForValor rolled 1d20+8 fort save --> [ 1d20=9 ]{17}
(12:44:38 AM) ForValor: damn, uber. Your rolls got a lot better.
(12:44:52 AM) Mask_de_GM: {FV, you missed my starting memo I take it. Come up with something cool, flavorful, and shadow related so I don't inadvertently TPK you fuckers}
(12:45:28 AM) ForValor: {O RLY? Coming up with shit now}
(12:45:33 AM) Andrew_Jackson: There won't be a TPK, I'm the gingerbread man.
(12:45:55 AM) Aria: (Come up with something before my character remembers she can 'port out of this. Shadows are much more interesting)
(12:45:59 AM) Mask_de_GM: AJ bursts straight through the rain and punches his way through the thick of the cloud. The shadow gets a little lighter here, freedom (for you) might be close at hands
(12:46:10 AM) Mask_de_GM: *hand
(12:46:43 AM) Hypolita: how high up are we?
(12:47:02 AM) Mask_de_GM: A good 3-400'
(12:47:05 AM) Mask_de_GM: or so
(12:47:15 AM) Mask_de_GM: AJ's at about 450
(12:47:17 AM) Hypolita: damn.
(12:47:26 AM) Andrew_Jackson: I have featherfall. No worries.
(12:47:32 AM) Mask_de_GM: :V
(12:47:40 AM) Aria: Presuming the forest isn't on fire below you
(12:47:47 AM) Aria: Fire hot
(12:47:48 AM) Mask_de_GM: which is most certainly is
(12:47:50 AM) Andrew_Jackson: I also have fire resistance.
(12:47:54 AM) Andrew_Jackson: 20 or so
(12:47:57 AM) Andrew_Jackson: because that's how I roll
(12:47:59 AM) Hypolita: well... failing anything else, I can use Bones of Earth for a solid two minutes and get myself an escape chute
(12:47:59 AM) ForValor: Diov shuts his eyes and starts shaking
(12:48:11 AM) Mask_de_GM: Doesn't hellfire beat Fire Resistance?
(12:48:17 AM) Aria: It does
(12:48:28 AM) Aria: If it's immunity it does half damage
(12:48:32 AM) Andrew_Jackson: the forest is burning with hellfire?
(12:48:41 AM) Hypolita: parts of it at least
(12:48:41 AM) Mask_de_GM: Hypo lit it up with both
(12:49:07 AM) Mask_de_GM: and seeing as how the smoke is probably a minor demon at this point, it's safe to say that the remaining fire is hellfire
(12:49:23 AM) ForValor: {Can I try to absorb the smoke into my body? Fort Save or something}
(12:49:23 AM) ForValor: 1d20+8 Fort Save to eat the shadowsmoke
(12:49:23 AM) ForValor: roll 1d20+8
(12:49:23 AM) ForValor: woops...
(12:49:23 AM) ForValor: roll 1d20+8 goddamn fort save
(12:49:23 AM) Dicesaurus: ForValor rolled 1d20+8 --> [ 1d20=8 ]{16}
(12:49:23 AM) Dicesaurus: ForValor rolled 1d20+8 goddamn fort save --> [ 1d20=20 ]{28}
(12:49:30 AM) ForValor: THERE!
(12:49:46 AM) Mask_de_GM: I'll take the second one
(12:50:09 AM) ***ForValor respects the GM
(12:50:34 AM) Mask_de_GM: Diov taps into the connection he has to the Plane of Shadow and tears open a one-way portal there which, for reasons only known to the DM, works akin to a vacuum
(12:50:59 AM) Mask_de_GM: It cracks open the box of nothing, and draws forth another pained howl from the shadow
(12:51:08 AM) Hypolita: "Hey, quicker than my earth chute. if it works it works."
(12:51:12 AM) Mask_de_GM: <HhHHHHURTS!>
(12:51:16 AM) Mask_de_GM: <BETRAAAAYED>
(12:51:35 AM) Mask_de_GM: The cloud redshifts, and the pressure becomes intense
(12:51:37 AM) ForValor: "<Sorry I'm doing this... Find a resting place somewhere in my homeland.>"
(12:52:28 AM) Mask_de_GM: Light peeks through the upper portions of the cloud cover as the material starts hardening
(12:52:40 AM) Mask_de_GM: It feels like you're going to burst, but you have to keep moving
(12:52:50 AM) ForValor: "LET'S FLY!!!"
(12:52:57 AM) Mask_de_GM: Everybody, uber's favorite save one more time
(12:53:01 AM) Aria: roll 1d20+10 Ref save
(12:53:01 AM) Dicesaurus: Aria rolled 1d20+10 Ref save --> [ 1d20=14 ]{24}
(12:53:03 AM) Hypolita: regardless Hypolita starts raising consecutive pillars of earth beneath her
(12:53:07 AM) Andrew_Jackson: FUCKING REFLEX SAVES
(12:53:10 AM) Hypolita: roll 1d20+7 ref
(12:53:10 AM) Dicesaurus: Hypolita rolled 1d20+7 ref --> [ 1d20=10 ]{17}
(12:53:13 AM) Andrew_Jackson: roll 1d20+13 ref
(12:53:13 AM) Dicesaurus: Andrew_Jackson rolled 1d20+13 ref --> [ 1d20=5 ]{18}
(12:53:21 AM) ForValor: 1d20+4 RefSave
(12:53:38 AM) Mask_de_GM: forgot the roll there chief
(12:53:47 AM) ForValor: fuckity fuck
(12:53:53 AM) ForValor: roll 1d20+4 RefSave
(12:53:53 AM) Dicesaurus: ForValor rolled 1d20+4 RefSave --> [ 1d20=20 ]{24}
(12:53:59 AM) ForValor: thank you, RNG
(12:54:08 AM) Hypolita: (It'll take two minutes to form a 5'x400' pillar)
(12:55:23 AM) Mask_de_GM: Diov grabs hold of Aria by the hand, makes a slashing motion with his free hand, and forces open another hole to the Plane of Shadow. It eats away at just enough of the material to crack it, which lets Andrew and Hypolita burst through the shattering shadowstuff
(12:56:06 AM) Mask_de_GM: At once, the light floods your senses as the area below you becomes like livid onyx run blood red
(12:56:47 AM) Mask_de_GM: Once more the shadow screams, stabbing jagged shards of itself into the last two adventurers before falling inert
(12:56:48 AM) ForValor: "What the hell..."
(12:57:12 AM) Mask_de_GM: you can't see the forest anymore, but you do see Brain Tower looming ahead
(12:57:13 AM) Aria: "Let's never do that again."
(12:57:29 AM) Hypolita: "damned ominously named locations not reacting to fire normally"
(12:58:09 AM) ForValor: "you're all welcome"
(12:58:17 AM) Hypolita: "Thanks Slim"
(12:58:19 AM) Andrew_Jackson: "GINGERBREAD MAAAAAAAN"
(12:58:29 AM) ForValor: "except you, gingerbread man. You did damn well by yourself."
(12:58:38 AM) Andrew_Jackson: (lqtm)
(12:59:11 AM) Mask_de_GM: AJ, Hypo, you two have angry little splotches of black on the back of your necks
(12:59:23 AM) Mask_de_GM: they aren't doing anything right now, but you should probably know that
(12:59:32 AM) Andrew_Jackson: Detect magic on it
(12:59:42 AM) Mask_de_GM: It's magical
(12:59:47 AM) Andrew_Jackson: detect evil on it
(12:59:57 AM) Mask_de_GM: Strong Infernal/Universal
(1:00:02 AM) Andrew_Jackson: dispel that shit
(1:00:12 AM) Mask_de_GM: It's unaligned
(1:00:24 AM) Mask_de_GM: but okay, targeted dispel on yourself?
(1:00:27 AM) Mask_de_GM: and Hypo
(1:00:31 AM) Hypolita: "Aww... do I have a little pet smoke demon now?"
(1:00:35 AM) Andrew_Jackson: oh shit
(1:00:40 AM) Andrew_Jackson: that means I'd have to cast my own buffs
(1:00:44 AM) Mask_de_GM: yep
(1:00:44 AM) Andrew_Jackson: maybe remove curse
(1:00:50 AM) Andrew_Jackson: remove curse?
(1:01:53 AM) Mask_de_GM: You cast remove curse on it, and the magic emanating from it goes silent
(1:02:09 AM) Mask_de_GM: it's still on you, but it just looks like a particularly shitty birthmark now
(1:02:18 AM) Andrew_Jackson: eh, I have a beard
(1:02:25 AM) Mask_de_GM: on the back of your neck?
(1:02:34 AM) Aria: He has beard EVERYWHERE
(1:02:38 AM) ForValor: hahahaha
(1:02:41 AM) Mask_de_GM: He is beard
(1:02:41 AM) Hypolita: Hypolita offers her little splotch pet a sip of beer
(1:02:44 AM) Andrew_Jackson: no, but having a beard means I can have all the defects I want and still get the girl
(1:02:49 AM) Mask_de_GM: lol
(1:02:53 AM) Andrew_Jackson: it's called the bearded protagonist effect
(1:02:56 AM) Andrew_Jackson: works every time
(1:03:09 AM) Mask_de_GM: Wang Gingerbread
(1:03:12 AM) Mask_de_GM: a man's man
(1:03:20 AM) Hypolita: gingerwang?
(1:03:22 AM) Andrew_Jackson: a gingerbread man
(1:04:02 AM) ForValor: Gingerbeard Man.
(1:04:06 AM) Mask_de_GM: Hypolita splashes beer on her neck and looks rather foolish, but a small pulse of pleasure that runs through her body tells her that was a good idea
(1:04:41 AM) Aria: Annnnyways. On to the tower! Let's see if we've smoked out any flayers...
(1:04:42 AM) Hypolita: "awesome, I have a weird creepy pet now. And I'll have you all know that was a traditional orcish cultural act!"
(1:05:11 AM) Aria: "Pouring beer on random body parts?"
(1:05:17 AM) Hypolita: "yes"
(1:05:25 AM) ForValor: "Sounds dwarvish to me."
(1:05:28 AM) Aria: "That would explain the smell."
(1:05:30 AM) Andrew_Jackson: GINGERBEARD MAN
(1:05:36 AM) Hypolita: "Nah, they stole it from us"
(1:05:41 AM) Mask_de_GM: Alright, you mosey on up to the tower, which is on full lockdown thanks to the raging hellfire that's deforesting the island
(1:05:41 AM) Hypolita: "stockholm syndrome"
(1:05:58 AM) Hypolita: full lockdown with a hole in the front of it?
(1:06:05 AM) Mask_de_GM: The windows are open, but no smoke seems to go through them
(1:06:11 AM) Aria: Fancy
(1:06:25 AM) Mask_de_GM: there's a little bit of pretty color shifting going down on them too
(1:06:46 AM) Andrew_Jackson: "BITCHES, I'M THE GINGERBEARD MAN, COME OUT AND FACE MY GINGERNESS!" shouts AJ
(1:07:06 AM) Hypolita: "Hey AJ, I thought gingers sunburnt in any amount of light"
(1:07:14 AM) ForValor: I'll shoot over to a window and see if I can get inside.
(1:07:58 AM) Andrew_Jackson: "GINGER SMASH!"
(1:08:05 AM) Mask_de_GM: "Are you nuts? You set the godsdamned forest on fire! You punched through a coal demon! We're not coming out there, why don't you come in here!"
(1:08:15 AM) Hypolita: I'll just pound the front of Braintower with another earth pillar
(1:08:53 AM) Mask_de_GM: You make your makeshift battering ram smash into the tower to no real effect
(1:09:04 AM) Hypolita: "damn. worked before..."
(1:09:18 AM) Aria: Anything happen if I shoot sparks through a window?
(1:09:23 AM) Mask_de_GM: "Sweet Cthulu, you people are insane!"
(1:09:26 AM) Mask_de_GM: try it
(1:09:27 AM) Mask_de_GM: :V
(1:09:32 AM) Aria: I do
(1:09:41 AM) Hypolita: "We're not insane, we're Adventurers!"
(1:09:44 AM) Hypolita: "also insane"
(1:10:37 AM) Mask_de_GM: The shots ping off of the window: it shifts orange with each impact sending hexagonal ripples from the epicenter
(1:11:25 AM) ForValor: "I think we could also rationalize as being assholes."
(1:11:28 AM) ForValor: dispel that shit?
(1:11:34 AM) Hypolita: I'm going to fly up to the top of the tower and look at the stone brain
(1:11:43 AM) Mask_de_GM: Try it
(1:12:03 AM) ForValor: "Hey, gingerbeard. Would you mind trying to dispel one of these magic windows?"
(1:12:16 AM) Andrew_Jackson: FUCK YOU I'M THE GINGERBREAD MAN
(1:12:17 AM) Andrew_Jackson: Sure
(1:12:24 AM) Andrew_Jackson: roll 1d20+8 dispel
(1:12:24 AM) Dicesaurus: Andrew_Jackson rolled 1d20+8 dispel --> [ 1d20=15 ]{23}
(1:12:44 AM) Mask_de_GM: The stone brain is ornately carved from quartz and glass, with deep rivulets of multicolored fluid running through the folds
(1:13:22 AM) Hypolita: "Anyone think anything particularly bad would happen if I smashed the shit out of this stone brain?"
(1:13:49 AM) ForValor: "Dude. Do it... wait, hold on. Does any part of the brain burn? Because I don't want to go through that shit again."
(1:14:15 AM) Hypolita: "No, no, I was thinking of using my pillars on this shit"
(1:14:17 AM) Mask_de_GM: The dispelling magic stops inches before hitting the wall, as it shifts colors from red, to orange, to yellow before flashing brightest white
(1:14:28 AM) Mask_de_GM: odds or evens folks?
(1:14:32 AM) Aria: Odds
(1:14:37 AM) Mask_de_GM: roll 1d5
(1:14:38 AM) Dicesaurus: Mask_de_GM rolled 1d5 --> [ 1d5=3 ]{3}
(1:14:42 AM) Aria: Cheers
(1:14:44 AM) Mask_de_GM: eh, that works
(1:14:56 AM) Mask_de_GM: And you get your eyes closed before you all go blind
(1:14:56 AM) ForValor: the "odds" were in our favor that time.
(1:15:04 AM) Mask_de_GM: yeah, but I'll give you that one
(1:15:27 AM) ForValor: "woah. Alright. Brain-smashing time."
(1:16:13 AM) Mask_de_GM: alright, is everybody going to smash the giant brain?
(1:16:27 AM) ForValor: Yes.
(1:16:33 AM) Aria: "Hmm. Interesting. I don't suppose you can pinpoint the source of this barrier, Andrew? Somebody or something must be maintaining it."
(1:16:34 AM) Hypolita: As she hovers above the brain on a swirling disk of sand, Hypolita performs a hard style kata, forming pillars of stone from the tower and driving them through the crystaline brain
(1:17:05 AM) Mask_de_GM: The brain shakes and buckles, cracks and splinters, but does not fall
(1:17:17 AM) Mask_de_GM: Sirens go up from around the tower
(1:17:29 AM) Mask_de_GM: and the fluid shifts white
(1:17:47 AM) Andrew_Jackson: "FUCK YOU I'M THE GINGERBEARD MAN"
(1:17:54 AM) Andrew_Jackson: *smash*
(1:17:55 AM) Mask_de_GM: filling in the cracks and reinforcing the damage
(1:18:09 AM) ForValor: I'll fire a cold spear into it.
(1:18:13 AM) Hypolita: "Hm... I could probably shape this thing at a whim..."
(1:18:41 AM) Mask_de_GM: Andrew Jackson rams headlong into the brain, and smacks flat against it like a bird on a windowpane
(1:18:58 AM) ForValor: "Fluids and all, Hypo?"
(1:19:14 AM) Hypolita: "Well if they're crystalline, maybe"
(1:19:35 AM) Mask_de_GM: The spear sings into one of the cracks that didn't make it all the way shut, and the fluid starts to slow and turn blue
(1:19:36 AM) Hypolita: "If not, I could probably just shape it such that the fluid runs out...
(1:19:58 AM) Hypolita: this thing less than 16^3ft?
(1:20:25 AM) ForValor: wouldn't it be easier to say 4096?
(1:20:39 AM) Aria: Nah, he means 16 cubic feet
(1:20:48 AM) Hypolita: right I think I screwed up notation
(1:20:49 AM) ForValor: ohhhh
(1:20:54 AM) Hypolita: 16ft^3
(1:21:01 AM) Mask_de_GM: yeah, that's 16 ft^3
(1:21:12 AM) Mask_de_GM: and no, it's a little bigger than that
(1:21:23 AM) Mask_de_GM: it is taking a little longer to reform itself though
(1:21:31 AM) Hypolita: damn. how much bigger?
(1:21:45 AM) Hypolita: can I just work with the top 16 ft^3?
(1:22:02 AM) Mask_de_GM: Go for it
(1:22:29 AM) Mask_de_GM: It's like 100 cubic feet
(1:22:35 AM) Hypolita: oh, jesus.
(1:22:39 AM) Hypolita: ok, well....
(1:22:45 AM) ForValor: that's "a little bigger"
(1:22:46 AM) Mask_de_GM: it's a giant brain on top of a giant tower
(1:23:27 AM) Hypolita: Hypolita nears the top of the brain and starts molding the upper 16 cubic feet into a giant flaccid dick
(1:23:30 AM) ForValor: shape it like a phallus.
(1:23:32 AM) ForValor: YES!
(1:23:38 AM) Hypolita: (stone shape used for the day)
(1:23:45 AM) ForValor: worth it.
(1:24:09 AM) Hypolita: complete with urethra to allow flow of fluid out, to dribble down the tower
(1:24:22 AM) Mask_de_GM: hahaha...oh wow
(1:24:50 AM) Hypolita: because dicks are inherently funny
(1:25:24 AM) Mask_de_GM: You do that, and the tower workers look at you with something between pity and fear, before fiddling with some dials and buttons
(1:25:49 AM) Hypolita: Hypolita gets the hell out of dodge if she has a chance
(1:26:00 AM) Aria: Tower workers?
(1:26:08 AM) Mask_de_GM: Portions of the brain start to fold open into small sieves, and from these sieves come cannons to bear
(1:26:14 AM) Mask_de_GM: Yes, there are people in the tower
(1:26:18 AM) Aria: Can we see these mentioned workers?
(1:26:21 AM) Mask_de_GM: Yes you can
(1:26:27 AM) Mask_de_GM: they're thralls in labcoats
(1:26:39 AM) ForValor: but they're behind windows... so we can't shoot them?
(1:27:00 AM) Mask_de_GM: you can try to break through, or shoot through the cannons if you're feeling yourselves
(1:27:02 AM) Aria: I'll attempt to Greater Teleport into the room with the mooks, then
(1:27:05 AM) Mask_de_GM: ah
(1:27:06 AM) Mask_de_GM: that works too
(1:27:29 AM) Hypolita: and I'll crush the canons with 20'lines of stone from the tower
(1:27:57 AM) ForValor: I'll use a Shadow Path, Fort Save for one of the thralls or go blind.
(1:28:31 AM) Mask_de_GM: Aria bamfs into the control room while Hypolita swings building stone against itself
(1:28:57 AM) Mask_de_GM: A thrall wheels on Aria, but falls to the ground, clutching his eyes in terror
(1:29:21 AM) ForValor: "fuckers..."
(1:29:26 AM) Mask_de_GM: the blue liquid goes flying out of the cannons that aren't totally destructed.
(1:29:35 AM) Mask_de_GM: roll 1d6
(1:29:36 AM) Dicesaurus: Mask_de_GM rolled 1d6 --> [ 1d6=4 ]{4}
(1:29:54 AM) Mask_de_GM: roll 1d20+5
(1:29:54 AM) Dicesaurus: Mask_de_GM rolled 1d20+5 --> [ 1d20=16 ]{21}
(1:30:06 AM) Mask_de_GM: hey Hypo, Diov, what are your ACs?
(1:30:19 AM) Hypolita: 18
(1:30:29 AM) ForValor: 18
(1:30:32 AM) Mask_de_GM: ah
(1:30:38 AM) ForValor: well damn
(1:31:09 AM) Mask_de_GM: The blue liquid clips both Diov and Hypolita, sending bitter cold up their nether regions
(1:31:20 AM) Mask_de_GM: roll 2d6
(1:31:21 AM) Dicesaurus: Mask_de_GM rolled 2d6 --> [ 2d6=4 ]{4}
(1:31:22 AM) Mask_de_GM: roll 2d6
(1:31:23 AM) Dicesaurus: Mask_de_GM rolled 2d6 --> [ 2d6=8 ]{8}
(1:31:42 AM) ForValor: "My testicles feel trembly... what the hell was that?"
(1:31:43 AM) Mask_de_GM: Hypo take 4 and give me a Fort save, Diov take 8 and give me a Fort save
(1:31:51 AM) ForValor: roll 1d20+8
(1:31:51 AM) Dicesaurus: ForValor rolled 1d20+8 --> [ 1d20=8 ]{16}
(1:32:01 AM) Hypolita: roll 1d20+5
(1:32:01 AM) Dicesaurus: Hypolita rolled 1d20+5 --> [ 1d20=6 ]{11}
(1:32:39 AM) Mask_de_GM: Diov quickly shakes off the testicle tremblings, but Hypo's hymened honeypot isn't so happy
(1:32:48 AM) Hypolita: "kinky, but I prefer heat play" Hypolita tosses an eldritch blast at the nearest cannon
(1:32:53 AM) Mask_de_GM: As the feeling spreads into the pit of her stomach
(1:32:56 AM) Hypolita: roll 1d20+6
(1:32:57 AM) Dicesaurus: Hypolita rolled 1d20+6 --> [ 1d20=2 ]{8}
(1:33:09 AM) Hypolita: assuming I'm not incapactated or anything
(1:33:30 AM) Mask_de_GM: Hypolita feels a bit [Sickened] by the whole situation
(1:33:38 AM) Hypolita: ah, ok
(1:33:43 AM) Mask_de_GM: which causes her shot to miss by a mile
(1:34:07 AM) Hypolita: "fffffuck. lets try that again..."
(1:34:12 AM) Mask_de_GM: Hey, AJ's been pretty quiet, it seems like now would be a good time for some smashy smashy
(1:34:21 AM) Andrew_Jackson: god damnit
(1:34:24 AM) Andrew_Jackson: you people always need me
(1:34:25 AM) Andrew_Jackson: fine
(1:34:26 AM) Andrew_Jackson: smash
(1:34:32 AM) Andrew_Jackson: what can I smite?
(1:34:37 AM) Mask_de_GM: I'm just trying to keep everybody involved
(1:34:37 AM) Aria: Cannons
(1:34:47 AM) Andrew_Jackson: not evil
(1:34:47 AM) Mask_de_GM: Cannons, giant quartz brain, etc
(1:34:56 AM) Andrew_Jackson: eh, I'm smiting the brain then
(1:35:06 AM) Mask_de_GM: then roll'em
(1:35:17 AM) Andrew_Jackson: i deal like 30 damage a hit
(1:35:20 AM) Andrew_Jackson: it's whatever
(1:35:22 AM) ForValor: Brain Smite, AKA Stroke
(1:35:45 AM) Andrew_Jackson: roll 1d20+400 I hit because it's an innanimate object
(1:35:46 AM) Dicesaurus: Andrew_Jackson rolled 1d20+400 I hit because it's an innanimate object --> [ 1d20=3 ]{403}
(1:36:00 AM) Andrew_Jackson: roll 1d8+400 I deal some damage, cuz it's stone
(1:36:01 AM) Dicesaurus: Andrew_Jackson rolled 1d8+400 I deal some damage, cuz it's stone --> [ 1d8=1 ]{401}
(1:37:15 AM) Mask_de_GM: You make a mighty blow into the brain, shattering a cannon and spraying blue fluid down into the side of the tower. Mooks scream and flail before falling unconscious, and you've made yourself a doorway if you just avoid that blue shit
(1:37:42 AM) Mask_de_GM: the whole tower shudders and tilts
(1:38:02 AM) ForValor: divebomb inside.
(1:38:10 AM) ForValor: is Aria on this level?
(1:38:12 AM) Mask_de_GM: Yeah
(1:38:19 AM) Hypolita: fly down inside
(1:38:26 AM) Mask_de_GM: She's waiting for you
(1:39:07 AM) ForValor: all mooks dead?
(1:39:08 AM) Mask_de_GM: you all end up on the inside, looking about at the [DEVICES] around you. There is a [VIDEO SCREEN] as the centerpiece of the now ruined room.
(1:39:09 AM) Mask_de_GM: Yeah
(1:39:18 AM) Aria: Let's take a look at it
(1:39:35 AM) Hypolita: Hypolita starts poking random buttons to try and work the screen
(1:39:38 AM) ForValor: I press X to interact
(1:40:14 AM) Mask_de_GM: Aria turns on the [VIDEO SCREEN] and on pops an image of a gnarled hand stroking a particularly fluffy Hellcat
(1:40:51 AM) ForValor: "Is that...?
(1:40:54 AM) ForValor: "
(1:41:20 AM) Hypolita: "I respect a man who knows how to properly stroke a fiery pussy"
(1:41:29 AM) Mask_de_GM: "So Gadget, it seems like you've found entrance into my Tower of Ego. You got lucky, but your luck shall soon run out once my elite team of...what do you mean "all dead?" What? But what about the? And the? BLAST!"
(1:42:03 AM) Hypolita: "Well, I made the title more true, for you, at least"
(1:42:05 AM) Mask_de_GM: "Fine, I'll just have to activate the Gauntlet of Despair then. Hehe, haha, HAHAHAHAHA*hackcoughwheeze*"
(1:42:16 AM) ForValor: Whispered to whoever's nearest: "What the hell is he talking about?"
(1:42:25 AM) Aria: "I haven't the faintest"
(1:42:25 AM) Mask_de_GM: And the [VIDEO SCREEN] goes blank
(1:42:43 AM) ForValor: "Gadget?"
(1:42:56 AM) Mask_de_GM: There's a [DOOR] in the parts that isn't slimed with weird blue gunk, and you can always try blowing through the center.
(1:42:59 AM) Hypolita: "No clue. Shall we go kill shit?"
(1:43:06 AM) Mask_de_GM: Promise the tower won't orgasm this time
(1:43:25 AM) Aria: Even though we properly equipped the brain to do so?
(1:43:29 AM) Aria: Disappointing
(1:43:35 AM) ForValor: "Hypolita, how's the pet shadow?"
(1:43:45 AM) Hypolita: "Hm, not a peep so far
(1:43:46 AM) Hypolita: "
(1:43:54 AM) Aria: Anyways, let's check out this door
(1:44:08 AM) ForValor: "Let's kick some ass."
(1:44:11 AM) Aria: Danger Sense means I'm always actively searching
(1:44:22 AM) Mask_de_GM: The [DOOR] opens to a white room with white walls and a blue crystal
(1:44:36 AM) Mask_de_GM: A disembodied voice asks: "Would you like to save your game?"
(1:44:43 AM) Aria: [YES]
(1:44:57 AM) Hypolita: "Thank you friend computer"
(1:45:04 AM) Mask_de_GM: [Saving game, please don't turn off the power...]
(1:45:09 AM) Mask_de_GM: [Save complete!]
(1:45:27 AM) Mask_de_GM: It's damn near 2 in the morning for me, so I'm calling it a night folks
(1:45:33 AM) Mask_de_GM: see you next monday
(1:45:35 AM) Aria: Right-o
(1:45:39 AM) Aria: We'll see you then, Mask
(1:45:41 AM) Hypolita: sounds good
(1:45:47 AM) ForValor: g'night then
(1:45:53 AM) Mask_de_GM: you want this transcriped?
(1:45:57 AM) Mask_de_GM: *transcripted?
(1:46:18 AM) ForValor: . . . yes
(1:46:34 AM) Aria: Might as well
(1:46:48 AM) Mask_de_GM: alright cool
(1:47:48 AM) ForValor: g'night Mask
(1:47:55 AM) Mask_de_GM: Should probably do something about the BM's Special Standard Shot type
(1:47:59 AM) Aria: Mmm
(1:48:05 AM) Aria: I've been thinking about that
(1:48:07 AM) Mask_de_GM: say that one three times fast :V
(1:48:08 AM) Aria: I'll post in ye thread
(1:48:29 AM) Mask_de_GM: g'night, for realsies this time.

[For Valor]

derp

stfu

[Prak]

Made a Gingerbread Man PrC. Because I had to.

[Pixels]

With Mask's permission, I'm going to switch Aria over to my rewrite of the Bullet Mage. It's mostly class feature changes - notably I'd like to swap my shot and bomb types for Sticky and Orbital Strike rather than the Standard and Multishot I had. We can pretend I was lobbing magical bombs instead of shooting sparks - the end result either way is that things blow up.

[God_of_Awesome]

This isn't quite finished. (Nor was much thought put into the magic items)

Tyrone Ramses

Statistics
~
Race/Type: Medium Humanoid (Human)
Class: Paladin (Samurai redux) 6
Speaks: Common, Draconic, Goblinoid
Allignment: Lawful Good



Ability Scores
~
Str: 14 (+2)
Dex: 18 (+4)
Con: 14 (+2)
Int: 12 (+1)
Wis: 14 (+2)
Cha: 16 (+3)


Vital Statistics
~
BAB: +6/+1
AC: 21
Speed: 30'
Initiative: +4
DR: None
Hit Points: 48
Saves: Fort 4 (2+2) Ref 6 (2+4) Will 7 (5+2)


Class / Race Features
~
Paladin (Samurai redux)
Hit Dice: d8
Class Skills: The Samurai's class skills (and the key ability for each skill) are Balance (Dex), Climb (Str), Concentration (Con), Craft (Int), Diplomacy (Cha), Escape Artist (Dex), Hide (Dex), Jump (Str), Knowledge (all skills individually) (Int), Listen (Wis), Move Silently (Dex), Perform (Cha), Profession (Wis), Sense Motive (Wis), Swim (Str), and Tumble (Dex).
Skills/Level: 4 + Intelligence Bonus

All of the following are Class Features of the Paladin class:
Weapon and Armor Proficiency: Samurai are proficient with all simple and martial weapons, as well as a single Exotic weapon appropriate to the Paladin's religion. Samurai are proficient with Light and Medium Armor, but not with shields of any kind.

Holy Weaponry: Every religion with a Paladin tradition has a signature weapon that Paladin from that religion use. Whether it is the Great Axes of the Berserkers of Khorne or the Long Sword of the Warriors of Justice, the weapon serves as a symbol of the office and prowess of the Paladin.
A paladin can only have one weapon designated as his Holy Weapon at a time, and this weapon must be a masterwork weapon exalted by the Paladin's warrior religion. He must perform a 24 hour ritual to call his faith's divinity into the weapon and designate it as his Holy Weapon. This ritual costs 100 gp in incense and offerings, and once performed grants the following abilities:
-Counts as his Holy Weapon for all Paladin abilities.
-Has a minimum enhancement bonus to attack and damage equal to his level divided by three (maximum of +5 for a samurai of 20th level or lower).
-The Holy weapon has double HPs and +10 Hardness, and has the Ghost Touch special
property.

Pledge of Faith:
The Paladin pledges his soul to a faith, the source of all his power. To retain his power, he must follow this faith's orders and uphold any Code of Conduct the faith exalts. He cannot be forced to act against his religion by mind-affecting effects but if he does so willingly he falls as a paladin.

Horde Breaker: A Paladin gains Horde Breaker as a bonus feat at 2nd level. If the Paladin already has this feat, he may choose a [Combat] Feat instead, but only if he meets the prerequisites of that feat.

Smite! (Ex): At 3rd level, a Paladin may convert a successful strike into a confirmed critical hit. He may use this ability a number of times per day equal to his half his Paladin level +2. This ability is a free action that is declared after the strike is rolled and confirmed as a hit, but before damage is rolled. This ability cannot be used on Attacks of Opportunity.

Whirlwind Attack: A Paladin gains Whirlwind Attack as a bonus feat at 4th level.

Holy Guidance: At 5th level, a Paladin may seek guidance from the spirits of previous followers of his faith. This counts as a commune effect that can be used once a day. A paladin may seek guidance from spirits of the followers of someone else's faith if they have one. This works like a speak with dead effect that can be used once per day.

Blindfighting: A Paladin gains Blindfighting as a bonus feat at 6th level. If the Paladin already has this feat, he may choose a [Combat[ Feat instead, but only if he meets the prerequsites of that feat.

Gods' Wrath: At 6th level, a Paladin's Holy Weapon bypasses Damage Reduction and ignores Hardness.



Human
No stat bonuses, bonus feat, +4 skill points, medium sized human, blagh, blagh.



Skills
~
Skills Points: 76
Skill Rank (Points+Bonus+Misc)

*Diplomacy 9 (6+3+)
Gather Information 6 (4/2+3+)
Intimidate 6 (6/2+3+)
*Knowledge (Arcana) 4 (3+1+)
*Knowledge (Local) 4 (3+1+)
*Knowledge (Religion) 4 (3+1+)
*Knowledge (Planes) 4 (3+1+)
*Sense Motive 8 (6+2+)
*Tumble 5 (1+4+)

*Balance 5 (1+4+)
Bluff 4 (2/2+3+)
*Climb 3 (1+2+)
*Concentration 3 (1+2+)
*Craft 1 (+1+)
Decipher Script 2 (2/2+1+)
Disable Device 2 (2/2+1+)
Disquise 4 (2/2+3+)
*Escape Artist 5 (1+4+)
Forgery 2 (2/2+1+)
Handle Animal 4 (2/2+3+)
Heal 3 (2/2+2+)
*Hide 5 (1+4+)
*Jump 2 (0+2+)
*Knowledge (Architecture) 2 (1+1+)
*Knowledge (Dungeoneering) 2 (1+1+)
*Knowledge (Georgraphy) 2 (1+1+)
*Knowledge (History) 2 (1+1+)
*Knowledge (Nature) 2 (1+1+)
*Knowledge (Nobility) 2 (1+1+)
*Listen 3 (1+2+)
*Move Silently 5 (1+4+)
Ride 5 (2/2+4+)
Search 2 (2/2+1+)
Sleight of Hand 4 (2/2+3+)
Speak Language 2 (2/2+1+)
Spellcraft 2 (2/2+1+)
Spot 3 (2/2+2+)
Survival 3 (2/2+2+)
Use Magic Device 4 (2/2+3+)

*Appraise 1 (+1+)
*Craft 1 (+1+)
*Perform 3 (+3+)
*Profession 2 (+2+)
*Swim 2 (+2+)
Use Rope 4 (+4+)

*Class Skills


Feats

Samurai Bonus:

Blind Fighting [Combat]
+0: You may reroll your miss chances caused by concealment.
+1: While in darkness you may move your normal speed without difficulty.
+6: You have Blindsense out to 60', this allows you to know the location of all creature out to 60' feet.

Horde Breaker [Combat]
+0: You gain a number of extra AoO each round equal to your dexterity bonus.
+1: Whenever you drop an opponent with a melee attack, you are entitled to a bonus 'cleave' against another opponent you threaten. You may not take a '5 step or otherwise move before taking this bonus attack. This Cleave attack is considered an AoO.
+6: You may take '5 step everytime you are entitled to a Cleave attack, which you may take before or after the attack.

Whirlwind [Combat]
+0: As a full round action, you may make an attack against every opponent you can reach. Roll one attack roll and compare against each opponent's AC.
+1: You gain a +3 bonus to Balance check.
+6: As a full round action, you may make a move action and a single attack action against every opponent you can reach. Roll one attack roll and compare against each opponent's AC.


Human Bonus:

Detective [Skill] Gather Information
0: You gain +3 to your Gather Information checks.
4: You ability to pick up on social context aids you in establishing rapport. (See Tome)


General:

Dreadful Demeanor [Skill] Intimidate
0: You gain +3 to your Intimidate checks.
4: You can demoralize an opponent as a move action.

Persuasive [Skill] Diplomacy
0: You gain a +3 to your Diplomacy checks.
4: Your words can stop fights before they start. (See Tome)
9: You can fascinate creatures with your silver tongue. (See Tome)

Two-Weapon Fighting [Combat]
+0: You suffer no penalties for doing things with your off-hand. When you make an attack or full-attack, you may make a number of attacks with your off hand as with your off-hand weapon equal to the number of attacks you are afforded with your primary weapon.
+1: While armed with two-weapons, you gain an extra AoO each round for each attack you would be allowed for your BAB, these extra AoO must be done with your off-hand.
+6: You gain +2 shield bonus to your armor class when fighting with two-weapons.


~



Equipment

Space Jump Cape: The wearer is granted pseudo-flight (120 ft, NO maneuverability). Instead of actually flight, he's really just jumping really far. The wearer must start on solid ground or floor and pick a destination. Once they reach it, they fall. The cape also protects against falling damage. It includes a helmet that is supposed to protect the wearer against the vacuum of space but it doesn't work.

Justice's Keeper: A long sword, his holy weapon, specially gifted by the Lady of Justice. It cannot harm the innocent nor will it execute a man for a crime if he is falsely accused. Putting it against someone throat make it is as if they are under a Zone of Truth with the exception they may be unaware of the effect.

Hero's Sacrifice: A light steel shield, another gift of the Lady, enchanted so that the wearer by duplicate the affect of Shield Other on any one creature without granting AC or resistance bonuses. The wearer may also duplicates Cure Moderate Wound but doing so duplicates Inflict Moderate Wound on themselves.

Legend's Splendor: Another gift of the Lady, a breast plate that by instilling a sense of legendary splendor in the wearer affects all social encounters positively. Charisma based checks that suceed are now succesful by another degree (IE Intimidate: Shakened foes are frightened, frightened foes are panicked. Diplomacy: Go from Friendly to Allies or whatever the stages are) and checks that fail may be re-rolled (Although these rolls are not subject to the above affects, including another rerolling).

Appearance


~

[ubernoob]

Enhancement bonuses don't stack. As a samurai you just get a +2 sword without it counting against your magic item limit.

[God_of_Awesome]

Enhancement bonuses don't stack. As a samurai you just get a +2 sword without it counting against your magic item limit.

Well fuck. Well, I'll keep the item anywho and just give it something else.

[God_of_Awesome]

Alright, that's all in order.

[Mask_De_H]

God dammit GoA, why can't you just do things simply and by the book? What part of Wonderous Item/up to 2nd level spell + 1/3 Enhancement bonus to something is so hard to understand? The Space Cape is the only thing that doesn't make me want to punch you in the gorram face, but I can't see how your items are functionally broken, so they get the go-ahead.

You're in, but between horning in on the shtick of the only remaining player from the last game and adding in more shit for me to parse you haven't done a good job of ingratiating yourself with your friendly neighborhood GM.

[Prak]

Oh, shit... I missed the level cap on items. Just checked and Bones of the Earth is Drd 6. Want me to change it?

[Mask_De_H]

Is it like the Hammer of Moradin capstone ability? If not, explain.

[Prak]

It's the spell giving me the 20' pillars of earth. PHB2:

Bones of the Earth
Conjuration (Creation) [Earth]
Level: Drd6
Components: V, S, DF
Casting Time: 1 std. act.
Range: 60'
Effect: One 5-ft.-diameter pillar of stone per round
Duration: 1 round/2 levels (D)
Saving Throw: Reflex negates
Spell Resistance: No

Each round as a standard action, you conjure a pillar of rock that bursts from a stone or earthen surface anywhere within the spell's range (60'). Each pillar fills a 5' square and grows to a height of 20' or until it a barrier such as a ceiling or wall. A large or smaller creature in a square where a pillar erupts must succeed on a reflex save or be carried upward by the force of the pillar. If the pillar is created in a room with a ceiling height of 20' or less, the rock slams into the ceiling dealing 4d6 points of damage to any creature atop it.
In a location with a ceiling height of more than 20', a creature carried up by a pillar must succeed on a DC 20 balance check or fall from the top of the pillar when it reaches it's maximum height. On a failed check, the creature plummets to the ground, taking 2d6 points of damage from the fall.
You can also cause a pillar to erupt from a vertical surface, in which case any creatures in the pillar's path must succeed on the reflex saves or take 2d6 points of damage and be knocked prone.
The pillar created is permanent and has AC 3, hardness 8 and 900 hit points. A pillar can be climbed with a DC 20 Climb check.

[God_of_Awesome]

God dammit GoA, why can't you just do things simply and by the book? What part of Wonderous Item/up to 2nd level spell + 1/3 Enhancement bonus to something is so hard to understand? The Space Cape is the only thing that doesn't make me want to punch you in the gorram face, but I can't see how your items are functionally broken, so they get the go-ahead.

You're in, but between horning in on the shtick of the only remaining player from the last game and adding in more shit for me to parse you haven't done a good job of ingratiating yourself with your friendly neighborhood GM.

I can change it. I still like the Henshin Armor's ability as well as the Space Cape. The sword and gauntlet can change though. Hrm...

Edit:

Justice's Keeper: A long sword, his holy weapon, specially gifted by the Lady of Justice. It cannot harm the innocent nor will it execute a man for a crime if he is falsely accused. Putting it against someone throat make it is as if they are under a Zone of Truth with the exception they may be unaware of the effect.

Hero's Sacrifice: A light steel shield, another gift of the Lady, enchanted so that the wearer by duplicate the affect of Shield Other on any one creature without granting AC or resistance bonuses. The wearer may also duplicates Cure Moderate Wound but doing so duplicates Inflict Moderate Wound on themselves.

Legend's Splendor: Another gift of the Lady, a breast plate that by instilling a sense of legendary splendor in the wearer affects all social encounters positively. Charisma based checks that suceed are now succesful by another degree (IE Intimidate: Shakened foes are frightened, frightened foes are panicked. Diplomacy: Go from Friendly to Allies or whatever the stages are) and checks that fail may be re-rolled (Although these rolls are not subject to the above affects, including another rerolling).

Hope these are better.

[ubernoob]

I don't think GoA is actually infringing on my schtick. My thing is being unkillable and providing minor action denial and healing. Offense I'm kind of lacking unless I get my buffs up and smite+blitz+power attack for full.

Even then, I can't one shot most CR 6 or lower creatures even with full buffs. If a boneblade lance was possible, I could do it, but you can't make a boneblade lance.

[Pixels]

Aria with the Bullet Mage rewrite

As predicted, changes were minor. Besides the class feature changes, I swapped out one item ability for +Dex instead (I actually have to make attack rolls now!), and picked up Sniper instead of Elusive Target.

[Mask_De_H]

I don't think GoA is actually infringing on my schtick. My thing is being unkillable and providing minor action denial and healing. Offense I'm kind of lacking unless I get my buffs up and smite+blitz+power attack for full.

Even then, I can't one shot most CR 6 or lower creatures even with full buffs. If a boneblade lance was possible, I could do it, but you can't make a boneblade lance.

I meant as a character concept, but whatever. If it's cool with the actual player of the character, it's cool with me. The rewrites work too.

In other news: I'll be on time today.

[ubernoob]

I don't think GoA is actually infringing on my schtick. My thing is being unkillable and providing minor action denial and healing. Offense I'm kind of lacking unless I get my buffs up and smite+blitz+power attack for full.

Even then, I can't one shot most CR 6 or lower creatures even with full buffs. If a boneblade lance was possible, I could do it, but you can't make a boneblade lance.

I meant as a character concept, but whatever. If it's cool with the actual player of the character, it's cool with me. The rewrites work too.

In other news: I'll be on time today.

Excuse me, but I'm an alcoholic that bangs succubi. I dare say the party doesn't know I'm a paladin.

[Prak]

I dare say you're not so much a paladin but rather a Warrior of Light Energy

[Mask_De_H]

We're rolling folks, get in #valhalla on irc.nightstar.net

[Prak]

Made a change to the Sand Armour at Uber's behest:
Sand Armour [Light]
Armour Bonus: +4, Max Dex: 6, ACP: -2, ASP: -2
This armour is actually an enchanted mass of sand designed to form a bond with you, taking direction from your mental command. It can be stored as a shaped mass when not in use.
Concentration Ranks Benefit
4: A mass of sand begins to swirl around you when you enter combat, joining and hardening when a blow comes near, absorbing the impact. You receive DR 5/Piercing
8: The magic of the armour, and the blood of your enemies that it has absorbed attracts/holds/causes a demon that merges with you. This demonic fusion grants a claw attack.
13: At your mental command, the sand can form a solid barrier between you and another creature about the size of a large, round tower shield. This barrier gives you cover against area and burst attacks. Alternatively, the sand can take a wide dispersal pattern around you and grant concealment. Only one of these forms can be active at a time, and it takes one round to switch. Your mental command is a free action.
18: You gain complete control over the sand, and can shape it at will, allowing you to use it to mimic the form of other items. When it mimics another suit of armour, it take on the numbers of the mimicked armour, but retains the special benefits of Sand Armour. Weapons formed have the return ability, and you retain the armour. If the armour is magical, then any item formed from it's sand is as well. It is a free action to form a weapon, and a full round action to form armour. Items small or smaller take a free action to form, medium a move action, large a standard, Huge, or complicated a standard, and gargantuan and larger items take a full round to form.

[Pixels]

And here's the transcript from Monday:

[20:00] * Mask_de_GM (Higgins@Nightstar-fea3a961.il.comcast.net) has joined #valhalla
[20:01] <Andrew_Jackson> hello, good GM
[20:01] <Mask_de_GM> yo
[20:02] <Andrew_Jackson> So, I think I've decided who my paladin's patron is
[20:02] <Andrew_Jackson> His bar
[20:02] <Aria> Heh
[20:02] <Aria> He serves a higher power - booze!
[20:03] <Andrew_Jackson> either that, or pokemon
[20:03] <Andrew_Jackson> I'm definitely playing pearl on an emulator
[20:05] * @NativeJovian (John@Nightstar-aebb6b37.fl.comcast.net) has left #valhalla
[20:06] <Mask_de_GM> heh
[20:06] <Mask_de_GM> The spirits are with him
[20:06] <Mask_de_GM> always
[20:15] * NSJavaGuest-9300 (nsJChat@Nightstar-86052984.scrm01.sbcglobal.net) has joined #valhalla
[20:15] * NSJavaGuest-9300 is now known as Hypolita
[20:15] <Mask_de_GM> yo
[20:15] <Hypolita> alright, Prak here
[20:15] <Hypolita> hey
[20:15] <Andrew_Jackson> so, 3 plus DM
[20:15] <Hypolita> so what's the verdict on Bones of Earth
[20:15] <Hypolita> ?
[20:16] <Mask_de_GM> Oh, it gives you Qualm's Tree Tokens made out of earth
[20:16] <Mask_de_GM> whatever
[20:16] <Hypolita> ok, cool
[20:17] <Mask_de_GM> man, that doesn't seem like 6th level worthy, like at all
[20:17] <Hypolita> yeah, I was kind of thinking that when I typed it up earlier
[20:17] <Hypolita> I could see it as maybe 3rd level, at most
[20:17] <Mask_de_GM> D&D writers have no sense of balance: news at 11
[20:18] <Andrew_Jackson> we've got three players and a DM
[20:18] <Andrew_Jackson> who else are we waiting on to start?
[20:19] <Hypolita> eh, everyone's sense of balance differs, but yeah, they have none
[20:19] <Mask_de_GM> FV and GoA
[20:19] <Mask_de_GM> I'll give 'em 5 minutes
[20:19] <Hypolita> ok
[20:19] <Hypolita> I'm pretty sure Valor's lurking on the board somewhere...
[20:24] <Mask_de_GM> Aaaand time's up
[20:24] <Aria> They'll trickle in later, I'm sure
[20:25] <Hypolita> Valor may not
[20:25] <Mask_de_GM> Alright, so you guys are on the top floor of the Brain Tower, after watching the video screen
[20:25] <Hypolita> looking at his "In a hospital bed" thread
[20:25] <Mask_de_GM> oh
[20:25] <Hypolita> so he's, what, npc until he shows up?
[20:26] <Andrew_Jackson> just add him into the game if he shows up when he shows up
[20:27] <Mask_de_GM> Yeah that
[20:27] <Andrew_Jackson> Anyways, brain tower
[20:28] <Mask_de_GM> As the Empusa, the Paladin, and the half-orc mull about what to do, a long hook reaches out from off screen and pulls For Valor's character off screen
[20:28] <Mask_de_GM> nobody notices
[20:29] <Mask_de_GM> There seems to be some sort of incompetent megalomaniac driving this thing: he seems boss esque.
[20:29] <Mask_de_GM> You don't really know where it is, but wandering around seemed to work last time
[20:29] <Andrew_Jackson> I bet we'll get phat lewt if we kill him
[20:29] <Hypolita> seems we were in a white room last
[20:29] <Aria> I seem to recall a door
[20:29] <Aria> We can start with that
[20:29] <Andrew_Jackson> roll 1d20 wander check
[20:29] <Dicesaurus> Andrew_Jackson rolled 1d20 wander check --> [ 1d20=19 ]{19}
[20:29] <Mask_de_GM> There is a [DOOR] to your left, out from the Save Room
[20:30] <Mask_de_GM> And Andrew Jackson finds a [MYSTERIOUS CRACK] behind him on his wanderings
[20:30] <Hypolita> do I "sense" anything beyond the door with my tremoursense?
[20:31] <Mask_de_GM> You sense a room
[20:31] <Andrew_Jackson> We should toss down buffs then kick in the door
[20:31] <Andrew_Jackson> Agreed?
[20:31] <Aria> Let's do it
[20:31] <Hypolita> no creatures moving about?
[20:31] <Mask_de_GM> Nope, although there is an object at the edge of your range
[20:31] <Hypolita> hell of a big room
[20:32] <Hypolita> "Ok, let's do this shit"
[20:32] <Mask_de_GM> and you mean "Kick in the crack?"
[20:32] <Andrew_Jackson> I'mma drop a divine favor, bulls strength, and owl's wisdom before I kick in the crack
[20:32] <Mask_de_GM> cool
[20:32] <Andrew_Jackson> but yeah, kick in the crack
[20:32] <Mask_de_GM> you burst through the [MYSTERIOUS CRACK] like some sort of deranged golden Kool-Aid Man
[20:33] <Mask_de_GM> and end up in a room with checkered walls and a big bullet-shaped something or other in the middle of the room
[20:33] <Andrew_Jackson> Swift action snap judgement on him
[20:33] <Mask_de_GM> It's inert
[20:33] <Mask_de_GM> it's a switch
[20:33] <Mask_de_GM> it can't be evil
[20:34] <Hypolita> it's a bullet shaped switch?
[20:34] <Mask_de_GM> yeah, a stubby bullet
[20:34] <Mask_de_GM> half an egg
[20:34] <Andrew_Jackson> [ACTIVATE SWITCH]
[20:34] <Hypolita> Go and play with the bullet
[20:35] <Mask_de_GM> The [SWITCH] disappears with a pop and a happy little jingle starts playing.
[20:35] <Hypolita> "Great, now I'm paranoid"
[20:35] <Mask_de_GM> A flower, a mushroom, and a fursuit magically appear where the switch was
[20:36] <Andrew_Jackson> Dibs on the fursuit.
[20:36] <Hypolita> so grabbing the mushroom
[20:36] <Aria> That leaves me the flower.
[20:36] <Mask_de_GM> You grab your items and the jingle stops
[20:37] <Hypolita> "So... like, do I eat this, or what?" *looking at the mushroom*
[20:37] <Aria> Might as well give 'em a quick scan with Detect Magic
[20:37] <Andrew_Jackson> Ooooh, I can do that!
[20:38] <Mask_de_GM> a black box appears in front of you and begins displaying information. [You have found the black switch palace, now everything will be swathed in the creeping darkness of unending despair. Have a fun, enjoy!]
[20:38] <Mask_de_GM> They're all mildly magical: the flower is evocation, the mushroom and fursuit are transmutation
[20:38] <Aria> I always have a fun
[20:38] <Andrew_Jackson> I'mma put on the fursuit
[20:39] <Hypolita> well I was going to have a fun if I could have found the other end of that bullet and some batteries...
[20:39] <Mask_de_GM> You feel yiffy
[20:39] <Andrew_Jackson> I jump
[20:39] <Andrew_Jackson> Do I jump higher than normal?
[20:39] <Mask_de_GM> yes
[20:39] <Andrew_Jackson> Down+B
[20:39] <Mask_de_GM> now touch yourself
[20:39] <Andrew_Jackson> turn to stone?
[20:39] <Mask_de_GM> you get rock hard
[20:39] <Mask_de_GM> ruin my juvenile pun why don't you :T
[20:40] <Andrew_Jackson> :P
[20:40] <Hypolita> *suspiciously eye the mushroom, looking from the rock hard furry to the large fungus in her hands*
[20:40] <Hypolita> "...you eat the flower first"
[20:41] <Mask_de_GM> the fungus turns in Hypolita's hand, suspiciously eyeing her with two black, unblinking eyes
[20:41] <Aria> "What do I look like, an elf?"
[20:42] <Andrew_Jackson> "Guys, we should head right. I bet the exit is to the right."
[20:42] <Hypolita> "Nope, guinea pig. Though eating this mushroom just became a slightly more attractive prospect... on the other hand, Poppa always said tears make the best lube"
[20:42] <Mask_de_GM> :V
[20:42] <Mask_de_GM> you did come from the right side, so AJ's got a point
[20:43] <Hypolita> Guess I shove the mushroom in my pack
[20:43] <Hypolita> "Lead the way raccoon man"
[20:43] <Andrew_Jackson> Plus, oldschool platformers always go from left to right. The boss is obviously at the right hand side of the level.
[20:43] <Andrew_Jackson> *leads way*
[20:44] <Aria> I'll tuck the flower into a belt pouch and follow
[20:45] <Mask_de_GM> you leave the palace, going through the save point, and out into the hub world, which is a few shades darker than you remember
[20:45] <Mask_de_GM> there is a [DOOR] to the left and the right
[20:45] <Hypolita> "Wasn't me this time, I swear"
[20:46] <Hypolita> kick in the first door
[20:46] <Andrew_Jackson> roll 1d20+9 strength check
[20:46] <Dicesaurus> Andrew_Jackson rolled 1d20+9 strength check --> [ 1d20=1 ]{10}
[20:46] <Andrew_Jackson> Well, we really should have hired a door wizard
[20:47] <Mask_de_GM> the door flies open on loose hinges, hits the side, then reverberates into Andrew Jackson's face, sending him on his ass
[20:47] <Hypolita> *push open the door*
[20:48] <Mask_de_GM> the door opens without incident, leading into a narrow corridor, lined with blue burning flames
[20:48] <Aria> Even doors don't like furries
[20:48] <Mask_de_GM> this is true
[20:48] <Hypolita> walls of blue flame or blue torches?
[20:49] <Mask_de_GM> torches with blue flames in them
[20:49] <Hypolita> ok, important distinction
[20:49] <Hypolita> hm...*open the second door*
[20:49] <Mask_de_GM> the door doesn't budge
[20:50] <Mask_de_GM> a sign appears: "You Need the Blue Hi"
[20:50] <Mask_de_GM> and give me a spot check
[20:50] <Aria> roll 1d20+18 Spot check
[20:50] <Dicesaurus> Aria rolled 1d20+18 Spot check --> [ 1d20=14 ]{32}
[20:50] <Andrew_Jackson> roll 1d20+20
[20:50] <Dicesaurus> Andrew_Jackson rolled 1d20+20 --> [ 1d20=11 ]{31}
[20:50] <Mask_de_GM> in fine print, you see "Translator's Note: Hi means fire"
[20:50] <Hypolita> *grab a blue torch*
[20:50] <Hypolita> *hold up to second door*
[20:51] <Andrew_Jackson> wait, someone else has as high of a spot check as me?
[20:51] <Andrew_Jackson> holy shit
[20:51] <Mask_de_GM> Second door clicks, then shifts red
[20:51] <Mask_de_GM> "You need the red Hi"
[20:51] <Hypolita> "...we're going to need red fire now aren't we?"
[20:51] <Mask_de_GM> Yep
[20:51] <Andrew_Jackson> The flower!
[20:52] <Aria> "Huh. Stupid prismatic locks. Well, no harm looking down this corridor first"
[20:52] <Hypolita> "save the flower"
[20:52] * Aria pulls it out
[20:52] <Hypolita> eldritch blast at second door
[20:53] <Hypolita> roll 1d20+6 ranged touch
[20:53] <Dicesaurus> Hypolita rolled 1d20+6 ranged touch --> [ 1d20=4 ]{10}
[20:54] <Mask_de_GM> The door clicks twice, and turns clear, but does not open. The sign says "is your spirit maximum?" You see the next room has a coat rack, with two rather nice coats at the forefront
[20:55] <Hypolita> "Bitch my spirit's beyond maximum"
[20:55] <Dicesaurus> "It says we need more spirits. Did anybody think to bring along some alcohol?"
[20:55] <Mask_de_GM> The sign says "Prove it then?"
[20:56] <Dicesaurus> (wrong window)
[20:56] <Andrew_Jackson> "Just grab some from the bar"
[20:56] <Aria> ^ Me
[20:56] <Hypolita> eldritch blast it again roll 1d20+6 ranged touch
[20:56] <Hypolita> roll 1d20+6
[20:56] <Dicesaurus> Hypolita rolled 1d20+6 --> [ 1d20=5 ]{11}
[20:56] <Mask_de_GM> The eldritch blasts, it does nothign
[20:56] <Mask_de_GM> *nothing
[20:56] <Hypolita> damn
[20:57] <Mask_de_GM> "That was burning, but it was not spirit. Show me the force of your courage?"
[20:57] <Mask_de_GM> *!
[20:57] <Andrew_Jackson> I have courage. Specifcally, an aura.
[20:58] <Mask_de_GM> "Your courage is strong, but unfocused. You must explode with force of will, drilling through onto the next room"
[20:59] <Hypolita> "well this door obviously loves furries"
[20:59] <Andrew_Jackson> "Whatever, I'm just going to summon a rhino to break the wall down if nobody disagrees"
[21:00] <Hypolita> "um, want me to save you the resources?"
[21:00] <Andrew_Jackson> "I can summon as many rhinos as I feel like it. Book of gears, yo"
[21:00] <Hypolita> "and I can bone the wall with earth as much as I want"
[21:01] <Mask_de_GM> The door sighs, "Look, this shouldn't be that hard of a riddle. The one which holds the power of danmaku can push their FORCE of will out, right?"
[21:01] <Andrew_Jackson> "Ok, we'll race"
[21:01] <Aria> Indeed.
[21:01] <Mask_de_GM> "Then do so"
[21:01] <Hypolita> *Pillar of earth through the wall*
[21:01] <Aria> I lay stickies all round the damn thing, then set 'em all off with a swift and follow it with an Orbital Strike for good measure
[21:02] <Mask_de_GM> The door (and a good chunk of the surrounding area) explodes in a shower of pretty colors
[21:02] <Mask_de_GM> The sign says *relieved sigh* before fading away.
[21:02] <Aria> "And that is how you deal with a door."
[21:02] <Hypolita> "Who says we need a door mage?"
[21:03] <Mask_de_GM> :V
[21:05] <Hypolita> *goes and checks out the coats*
[21:05] * Aria does the same
[21:06] <Andrew_Jackson> I have a coat already. A coat of fur.
[21:06] <Hypolita> yeah, but furries burn in hell
[21:06] <Hypolita> I've seen it
[21:07] <Mask_de_GM> Hypolita and Aria go to check out the coats; upon further inspection they're very fine black cloaks with gleaming ivory clasps
[21:07] <Aria> "Oooh, very stylish"
[21:07] * Aria takes one
[21:07] <Hypolita> *puts the other on*
[21:07] <Mask_de_GM> Hey Hypo, odds or evens
[21:07] <Hypolita> odds
[21:08] <Mask_de_GM> roll 1d6
[21:08] <Dicesaurus> Mask_de_GM rolled 1d6 --> [ 1d6=4 ]{4}
[21:08] * NSJavaGuest-0243 (nsJChat@Nightstar-5c7a40b7.ca.comcast.net) has joined #valhalla
[21:08] <NSJavaGuest-0243> What is my Nick?
[21:09] <Mask_de_GM> The cloak fits like a glove. A glove made of pain and misery
[21:09] <Hypolita> fuck. just like home... *tries to take it off*
[21:09] <Mask_de_GM> What's your BAB and Touch AC
[21:10] <Hypolita> 4 and 12
[21:10] <Mask_de_GM> So I'm aiming for 16
[21:10] <Aria> Your current nick is NSJavaGuest-0243. You should change it if you want people to know who you are
[21:10] <Mask_de_GM> roll 1d20+13
[21:10] <Dicesaurus> Mask_de_GM rolled 1d20+13 --> [ 1d20=8 ]{21}
[21:11] <Hypolita> fuck, so what happens?
[21:11] <Mask_de_GM> Hypolita goes to take off the cloak, but it latches on to her arms with it's powerful clasps
[21:11] <Hypolita> "Kinky, but this sucks..."
[21:11] <Mask_de_GM> It unfurls its fearful fullness, becoming a great, wraithlike being with an absurd wingspan and great chitinous tail
[21:12] <Hypolita> "sonoffa..."
[21:12] <Hypolita> (brb)
[21:12] <Mask_de_GM> You feel the air being stolen from your lungs as it tightens
[21:12] * NSJavaGuest-0243 is now known as Tyrone
[21:12] <Mask_de_GM> Aria, give me a reflex roll
[21:12] <Aria> roll 1d20+11 Ref save
[21:12] <Dicesaurus> Aria rolled 1d20+11 Ref save --> [ 1d20=9 ]{20}
[21:13] <Mask_de_GM> That's good enough
[21:13] <Aria> I presume the one I picked up decided it was alive as well?
[21:13] <Mask_de_GM> As this happens, Aria flings her cloak to the ground right as it starts going for the throat
[21:13] <Aria> "So much for fashion..."
[21:14] <Mask_de_GM> As the cloak hits the floor, the one latched on to Hypolita lets out a dreadful moan and bites down on her
[21:14] <Mask_de_GM> Initiative time and...
[21:14] <Mask_de_GM> roll 1d4+2
[21:14] <Dicesaurus> Mask_de_GM rolled 1d4+2 --> [ 1d4=3 ]{5}
[21:14] <Aria> roll 1d20+7 Initiative roll
[21:14] <Dicesaurus> Aria rolled 1d20+7 Initiative roll --> [ 1d20=2 ]{9}
[21:14] <Mask_de_GM> Hypo takes 5 damage
[21:15] <Hypolita> roll 1d20+2 init
[21:15] <Dicesaurus> Hypolita rolled 1d20+2 init --> [ 1d20=18 ]{20}
[21:15] * Zine (a@4DB9AD.8CD7B5.9A82EE.55E7F7) has joined #valhalla
[21:15] <Mask_de_GM> roll 1d20+7
[21:15] <Dicesaurus> Mask_de_GM rolled 1d20+7 --> [ 1d20=18 ]{25}
[21:15] <Mask_de_GM> roll 1d20+7
[21:15] <Dicesaurus> Mask_de_GM rolled 1d20+7 --> [ 1d20=20 ]{27}
[21:15] <Andrew_Jackson> roll 1d20+1 init assuming I see what's going on
[21:15] <Dicesaurus> Andrew_Jackson rolled 1d20+1 init assuming I see what's going on --> [ 1d20=10 ]{11}
[21:15] <Zine> (Whoops)
[21:16] <Mask_de_GM> Andrew Jackson sees the crazy shit going down, but is a half a step too slow to get his preemptive strike like usual
[21:17] <Mask_de_GM> {and isn't last in initiative for once}
[21:17] <Tyrone> Where can I fit in?
[21:18] <Mask_de_GM> Odds or evens GoA?
[21:19] <Mask_de_GM> Tyrone?
[21:19] <Mask_de_GM> hello?
[21:19] <Mask_de_GM> PM
[21:20] <Mask_de_GM> Fuck it. One of the evil cloaks takes off into the air, gathering shadows around it, making it harder to discern its position
[21:20] <Hypolita> which one?
[21:21] <Mask_de_GM> while the one holding Hypolita attempts to cinch in its hold
[21:21] <Hypolita> k
[21:22] <Hypolita> "Fuck this shit" *Earth glide into the floor deep enough to be completely incased*
[21:23] <Mask_de_GM> Alright, hold up
[21:24] <Mask_de_GM> roll 1d20+13
[21:24] <Dicesaurus> Mask_de_GM rolled 1d20+13 --> [ 1d20=15 ]{28}
[21:24] <Mask_de_GM> The cloaked being pushes you down and holds you there, until you start sinking
[21:25] <Mask_de_GM> Confused and angry, it pulls back, leaving you half-encased and looking like a rather angry lawn gnome
[21:25] <Mask_de_GM> It's actually your turn now too
[21:26] <Hypolita> wait, eh? it's keeping me out of the floor?
[21:26] <Mask_de_GM> It made the hold down check, and you acted out of turn
[21:27] <Mask_de_GM> but the trick is cool, so I'm trying to meet you half way
[21:27] <Hypolita> ok, sorry, meant that to be my turn
[21:27] <Hypolita> so, I keep sinking
[21:28] <Hypolita> on my turn I mean
[21:28] <Hypolita> I keep trying to sink down
[21:29] <Mask_de_GM> Okay, you sink further into the ground, bringing parts of it in with you
[21:29] <Mask_de_GM> it shrieks and moans and keeps its "head" topside
[21:29] <Mask_de_GM> AJ, you go
[21:29] <Andrew_Jackson> I'mma wander over and get my smite on the other one
[21:30] <Andrew_Jackson> roll 1d20+17 smite
[21:30] <Dicesaurus> Andrew_Jackson rolled 1d20+17 smite --> [ 1d20=11 ]{28}
[21:30] <Andrew_Jackson> roll 1d8+30 damage
[21:30] <Dicesaurus> Andrew_Jackson rolled 1d8+30 damage --> [ 1d8=1 ]{31}
[21:31] <Andrew_Jackson> and assuming it had more than 55 hp to start, will save vs slow
[21:31] * Tyrone (nsJChat@Nightstar-5c7a40b7.ca.comcast.net) Quit (Ping timeout: 121 seconds)
[21:31] <Mask_de_GM> does Smite beat concealment?
[21:32] <Andrew_Jackson> I don't think so
[21:32] <Mask_de_GM> roll 1d100
[21:32] <Dicesaurus> Mask_de_GM rolled 1d100 --> [ 1d100=16 ]{16}
[21:32] <Andrew_Jackson> did I miss?
[21:32] <Mask_de_GM> The kusari-gama cuts a ragged gash through the shadows, burning some of them away
[21:32] <Aria> I suspect you did
[21:33] <Mask_de_GM> unfortunately, it doesn't burn away the cloaker
[21:33] <Andrew_Jackson> well, if I miss then my smite is still usable next round
[21:33] <Mask_de_GM> true
[21:33] <Andrew_Jackson> swift action at the end of the round to drop divine favor
[21:33] <Mask_de_GM> Aria, your turn
[21:34] <Aria> I unleash a salvo of stickies at the one holding Hypo. Exceptional aim to avoid hitting her, if it's even a problem when she's in the ground.
[21:34] <Aria> roll 1d20+8 Ranged touch attack
[21:34] <Dicesaurus> Aria rolled 1d20+8 Ranged touch attack --> [ 1d20=4 ]{12}
[21:34] <Aria> Arrrr
[21:36] <Mask_de_GM> roll 1d100
[21:36] <Dicesaurus> Mask_de_GM rolled 1d100 --> [ 1d100=90 ]{90}
[21:36] <Aria> That hit? I'm surprised.
[21:36] <Mask_de_GM> Alright, you take a shot and scrape the thing's collar
[21:36] <Mask_de_GM> roll damage
[21:36] <Dicesaurus> Mask_de_GM rolled damage --> error: malformed expression
[21:36] <Mask_de_GM> :T
[21:36] <Aria> roll 6d6+36 6x Sticky damage
[21:36] <Dicesaurus> Aria rolled 6d6+36 6x Sticky damage --> [ 6d6=19 ]{55}
[21:37] <Aria> And a Will save or Stun
[21:38] <Mask_de_GM> There's not gonna be a Will save, as the cloaker gets blown to bloody pieces
[21:38] <Aria> "Darkness, meet light"
[21:41] <Mask_de_GM> The remaining cloaker shrieks and flies back into the darkness, as tendrils of shadow get into the other cloaks, birthing a swarm of swirling, shrieking cloakers
[21:41] <Mask_de_GM> Hypo, you're up
[21:41] <Hypolita> so do I still have a cloaker on my ass?
[21:42] <Mask_de_GM> you've got the tattered remains of one
[21:42] <Mask_de_GM> since its head got blown off
[21:42] <Hypolita> ah, ok
[21:42] <Hypolita> Turn around in the stone and blast the one that flew up with eldritch fire
[21:42] <Hypolita> roll 1d20+6 ranged touch
[21:42] <Dicesaurus> Hypolita rolled 1d20+6 ranged touch --> [ 1d20=16 ]{22}
[21:42] <Hypolita> roll 6d6 damage
[21:42] <Dicesaurus> Hypolita rolled 6d6 damage --> [ 6d6=18 ]{18}
[21:43] <Mask_de_GM> You can see through stone?
[21:43] <Hypolita> hm, no, but the intention was to have my arms and eyes up, just ready to duck back in as necessary
[21:44] <Mask_de_GM> eh, that makes sense, but makes me have to backtrack
[21:44] <Mask_de_GM> Pixels, does your Extraordinary Aim account for splash effects?
[21:45] <Aria> I was presuming so.
[21:46] <Mask_de_GM> Eh, fuck it
[21:46] <Andrew_Jackson> I have to run and work out
[21:46] <Mask_de_GM> Tell me if you're not going all the way under next time Prak, that's kind of important
[21:46] <Andrew_Jackson> Later y'all
[21:46] <Mask_de_GM> peace
[21:46] * Andrew_Jackson (nsJChat@A2BA3E.CCFB1E.8240C8.13625D) Quit ([NS] Quit: Nightstar's Java Chat http://www.nightstar.net)
[21:46] <Hypolita> that was the idea, and meant that when I turned around, I would pop my face and arm out
[21:47] <Mask_de_GM> Whatever, you got darkvision?
[21:47] <Hypolita> but sorry, my bad
[21:47] <Hypolita> yeah
[21:47] <Mask_de_GM> cool
[21:47] <Mask_de_GM> roll 1d100
[21:47] <Dicesaurus> Mask_de_GM rolled 1d100 --> [ 1d100=99 ]{99}
[21:47] <Mask_de_GM> :V
[21:48] <Mask_de_GM> Your shot rips through a few of the newborn cloaks, which poof out of existence before hitting the cloak in the side; sending out an acrid smoke
[21:48] <Mask_de_GM> it screams and Aria is up
[21:50] <Mask_de_GM> Ariaaaaa
[21:50] <Aria> Hmm. Too soon for another Orbital Strike
[21:50] <Aria> So
[21:50] <Aria> I'll lob stickies. Going to split it into two batches of three and try to cover more of them
[21:50] <Aria> roll 1d20+8 Ranged touch attack
[21:50] <Dicesaurus> Aria rolled 1d20+8 Ranged touch attack --> [ 1d20=8 ]{16}
[21:50] <Aria> roll 1d20+8 Ranged touch attack
[21:50] <Dicesaurus> Aria rolled 1d20+8 Ranged touch attack --> [ 1d20=6 ]{14}
[21:51] <Mask_de_GM> roll 1d100
[21:51] <Dicesaurus> Mask_de_GM rolled 1d100 --> [ 1d100=59 ]{59}
[21:51] <Mask_de_GM> roll damage
[21:51] <Dicesaurus> Mask_de_GM rolled damage --> error: malformed expression
[21:51] <Aria> roll 3d6+18 3x stickies
[21:51] <Dicesaurus> Aria rolled 3d6+18 3x stickies --> [ 3d6=10 ]{28}
[21:51] <Aria> roll 3d6+18 3x stickies
[21:51] <Dicesaurus> Aria rolled 3d6+18 3x stickies --> [ 3d6=14 ]{32}
[21:52] <Aria> Damage to primary, half to other cloakers within 5'
[21:53] <Mask_de_GM> Aria lobs some stickies in the general direction of the flying cloaker, which manage to stick on the ceiling. The blast sends chunks of rocks down on the cloaker, crushing it underfoot. The swirling mass dissipates harmlessly and battle music hits
[21:53] <Mask_de_GM> *victory music
[21:54] <Mask_de_GM> {Okay, fuck the CR+4 monster building guideline, you guys swing at a much higher weight class than that}
[21:56] <Mask_de_GM> so now, what do
[21:56] <Aria> Two players, huh
[21:56] <Mask_de_GM> yeah
[21:56] <Mask_de_GM> Tyrone bounced
[21:56] <Hypolita> Guess I'll come back out of the stone
[21:57] <Mask_de_GM> and AJ's on a GINGERBREAD MANNNNNN! kick again
[21:57] <Mask_de_GM> which he promptly demonstrates by bursting through a wall
[21:57] <Mask_de_GM> and sprinting out of sight
[21:58] <Aria> Well, I think we could continue alone if y'all are up for it.
[21:58] <Hypolita> probably
[21:59] <Aria> Other option is to wait for AJ to come back from exercising. Or just call it a short night.
[21:59] <Aria> I'm up for continuing myself
[21:59] <Hypolita> eh, let's continue
[21:59] <Mask_de_GM> yeah, keep going
[22:00] <Aria> Anything in the room aside from the tattered remains of cloakers?
[22:00] <Hypolita> *pick up the cloaker corpse and put it back on*
[22:01] <Mask_de_GM> It fits rather nicely, outside of the smell of charred flesh and ichor emanating from it
[22:01] <Mask_de_GM> *and the weird tatters
[22:01] <Mask_de_GM> which make it fall in strange pattersn
[22:01] <Mask_de_GM> *patterns
[22:02] <Mask_de_GM> There's a [DOOR] and a [VERY LARGE HOLE] in the room
[22:02] <Hypolita> still good
[22:02] <Hypolita> "hm.. check out the hole?"
[22:02] <Aria> "Agreed."
[22:02] <Mask_de_GM> The [VERY LARGE HOLE] leads upwards into a tiled bathroom
[22:04] <Aria> I'll pocket anything that looks like it might be worth something and peek out the bathroom door
[22:05] <Hypolita> how nice is the bathroom?
[22:05] <Mask_de_GM> Incredibly
[22:06] <Mask_de_GM> It's nicer than some people's houses
[22:06] <Hypolita> dibs on this bathroom and the tower when we kill everything in here
[22:06] <Aria> "You can take it. It's going to be full of holes once we're through with it."
[22:07] <Mask_de_GM> You go through the [VERY LARGE HOLE] and see the opulent splendor of the bathroom
[22:07] <Hypolita> "eh I can fix 'em"
[22:08] <Mask_de_GM> There are golden fountains of what appear to be Greco-Roman statues, but with more tentacles
[22:08] <Hypolita> "Ooh, tentacles!"
[22:08] <Mask_de_GM> There is a bath tub the size of an Olympic swimming pool, filled with grubby looking bastards
[22:09] <Hypolita> "hmm... should I fill that thing full of hellfire?"
[22:09] <Mask_de_GM> Harp music adds soft ambiance, occasionally punctuated with staccato screams
[22:09] <Aria> "I'm thinking a little shock will go further..."
[22:09] <Mask_de_GM> Paintings line the walls, demotivational posters and neo-Weimar portraits
[22:10] <Hypolita> *walk nearer the tub* "So who's your guys' interior decorator? I love what you've done with the place"
[22:10] <Mask_de_GM> Everything looks nice and expensive, although those dog-looking ivory statues are looking at your funny
[22:10] <Mask_de_GM> A few of the grubby guys turn to Hypo. "Who the hell are you?"
[22:11] <Hypolita> "I'm the bitch that's been ripping your tower apart"
[22:11] <Mask_de_GM> "Oh, that's nice" bellows a voice in the back of Hypolita's head.
[22:12] <Mask_de_GM> give me a Will save
[22:12] <Hypolita> roll 1d20+6 will
[22:12] <Dicesaurus> Hypolita rolled 1d20+6 will --> [ 1d20=1 ]{7}
[22:12] <Mask_de_GM> :V
[22:12] <Aria> Oh dear
[22:12] <Hypolita> well shit
[22:13] <Mask_de_GM> "Now, be a good girl and tell me your name, your purpose, and why I shouldn't make you take a swan dive into the forest right now"
[22:14] <Hypolita> compelled to answer that I take it?
[22:14] <Mask_de_GM> His words are very persuasive, he has quite the {Dominating Person}
[22:14] <Mask_de_GM> *ality
[22:15] <Hypolita> "Hypolita, general destruction towards re-establishing my family's evil kingdom, and because I'll kick your betentacled ass and make you my bitch"
[22:16] <Mask_de_GM> "Heh, cute." the being chuckles, great and booming in Hypolita's mind
[22:16] <Aria> I have enough Sense Motive to tell Hypo's being dominated even if I roll a 1 on the check.
[22:16] <Hypolita> "Yeah, that's what my uncle said once... now he has no balls..."
[22:16] <Aria> So I think I'm going to drop an Orbital Strike on the tub, if you don't mind.
[22:17] <Aria> Exceptional aim to exclude the two of us from the ensuing blast
[22:17] <Aria> roll 1d20+8 Ranged touch attack
[22:17] <Dicesaurus> Aria rolled 1d20+8 Ranged touch attack --> [ 1d20=1 ]{9}
[22:17] <Aria> Ooooorrr not
[22:18] <Mask_de_GM> I wasn't done giving dialog yet
[22:18] <Mask_de_GM> :V
[22:18] <Aria> (alright, continue)
[22:18] <Mask_de_GM> Fuck it, moment's gone
[22:18] <Aria> I probably wouldn't notice for a few seconds anyways
[22:18] <Mask_de_GM> The orbital strike goes wide, and takes out one of the statues
[22:19] <Hypolita> so... is actually affecting my actions?
[22:19] <Mask_de_GM> "That was my favorite statue! Loudmouth, go sit in a corner until we're done with your friend"
[22:19] <Mask_de_GM> Yeah
[22:19] <Hypolita> damnit
[22:19] <Mask_de_GM> go sit in a corner somewhere
[22:19] <Hypolita> *goes and sits in a corner*
[22:21] <Hypolita> ...which would actually somewhat be against her nature...
[22:21] <Mask_de_GM> The grubby looking bastards start crawling out of the tub as the place shifts dark and horrible; pits of utter hell opening up around Aria
[22:21] <Mask_de_GM> :V
[22:21] <Mask_de_GM> as the comfiest looking chair in existence rolls out to greet Hypolita
[22:22] <Mask_de_GM> when she carries out her request/command
[22:22] <Hypolita> do I get a new save since my nature would be to fuck shit up?
[22:22] <Mask_de_GM> It's a really, really, REALLY fucking nice chair
[22:22] <Mask_de_GM> so next round
[22:22] <Hypolita> but. but. battle! alright
[22:23] <Mask_de_GM> Aria, gimme Init
[22:23] <Aria> "Well, this place got might uncomfortable mighty fast. Let's see if we can't make it a little more lively..."
[22:23] <Aria> roll 1d20+7 Initiative roll
[22:23] <Dicesaurus> Aria rolled 1d20+7 Initiative roll --> [ 1d20=20 ]{27}
[22:23] <Aria> That's more like it
[22:23] <Mask_de_GM> roll 1d20+1
[22:23] <Dicesaurus> Mask_de_GM rolled 1d20+1 --> [ 1d20=9 ]{10}
[22:23] <Mask_de_GM> roll 1d20+7
[22:23] <Dicesaurus> Mask_de_GM rolled 1d20+7 --> [ 1d20=5 ]{12}
[22:24] <Hypolita> roll 1d20+2 init might as well
[22:24] <Dicesaurus> Hypolita rolled 1d20+2 init might as well --> [ 1d20=6 ]{8}
[22:25] * Aria flings a bunch of sparkly explosive motes at the grubby bastard in front
[22:25] <Aria> roll 1d20+8 Ranged touch attack
[22:25] <Dicesaurus> Aria rolled 1d20+8 Ranged touch attack --> [ 1d20=5 ]{13}
[22:25] <Mask_de_GM> Okay, Aria's surrounded by belching flames of utter destruction, Hypolita can see the grubby bastards are pouring out of the pool like a goddamned anthill, and the tentacle dude is laughing in your head
[22:25] <Mask_de_GM> let me finish talking
[22:25] <Mask_de_GM> :T
[22:25] <Aria> Sorry
[22:26] <Mask_de_GM> it takes a long time to exposit
[22:26] <Mask_de_GM> Aria, you don't really have Line of Sight to the grubby bastards any more, but Hypo can help
[22:26] <Mask_de_GM> by telling you where they are
[22:26] <Aria> Alternatively
[22:27] <Aria> I use my move action to teleport to a different part of the bathroom. Hopefully one not covered in hellfire
[22:28] <Mask_de_GM> Okay, you teleport away from the circle of fire into one of the stalls. You have cover, but there are tentacles coming out of the toilet. Tentacles with baby doll heads
[22:28] <Mask_de_GM> you see some grubby bastards fanning out from under the stall
[22:28] <Aria> "I take it back. This is the worst bathroom ever."
[22:29] <Mask_de_GM> you've got a standard, what do?
[22:29] <Aria> Deal with the immediate threat of the toliet. By blowing it sky high, as usual.
[22:30] <Mask_de_GM> Alright cool, give me a Will save
[22:30] <Aria> roll 1d20+5 Will save
[22:30] <Dicesaurus> Aria rolled 1d20+5 Will save --> [ 1d20=5 ]{10}
[22:30] <Aria> Ah, not good. :P
[22:31] <Mask_de_GM> You blow the toilet to fucking bits, but get some baby doll tentacle thing on you, which, frankly, leaves you {Sickened}
[22:31] <Mask_de_GM> something doesn't feel right about it, but you're too freaked to worry about that right now
[22:32] <Mask_de_GM> The tentacled chap asks Hypolita, "Hey, how are you enjoying that chair?" as he probes into her mind
[22:33] <Mask_de_GM> {What does Hypolita like outside of killing shit?}
[22:33] <Hypolita> "The chair? It's nice. Could use a good foot stool, but it's the perfect place to shoot shit and command bitches from."
[22:34] <Hypolita> (um...sex, drinking, thieving and subjugating, not necessarily in any kind of order)
[22:34] <Mask_de_GM> A comfortable foot stool appears under Hypolita's feet, as an {OBJECT OF PERVERSE HALF-ORC LUST} begins to kiss them
[22:35] <Aria> (If you are anything like your parents, this is probably why your nation fell :P)
[22:35] <Hypolita> "Ok, you? I like."
[22:35] <Mask_de_GM> Meanwhile, the grubby bastards continue to press forward
[22:35] <Mask_de_GM> towards the explosion
[22:35] <Mask_de_GM> caused by Aria, who's up
[22:36] <Hypolita> (quite possibly. I'm kind of imagining the Orc and fiend equivalents of the old Heterodynes from Girl Genius by this point)
[22:36] <Aria> If I hover up, could I fire over the stall partition?
[22:38] <Mask_de_GM> yeah
[22:38] <Aria> Right. I do that, and lob a set of six stickies at whatever is the tightest clump of grubbies.
[22:39] <Aria> roll 1d20+6 Ranged touch attack
[22:39] <Dicesaurus> Aria rolled 1d20+6 Ranged touch attack --> [ 1d20=10 ]{16}
[22:39] <Mask_de_GM> The stickies land at the feet of an encroaching wave of grubby bastards
[22:39] <Mask_de_GM> roll damage
[22:39] <Dicesaurus> Mask_de_GM rolled damage --> error: malformed expression
[22:39] <Aria> I'll have to see if I can tinker with the script and fix that later
[22:39] <Aria> Anyways
[22:39] <Aria> roll 6d6+36 Sticky damaage
[22:39] <Dicesaurus> Aria rolled 6d6+36 Sticky damaage --> [ 6d6=24 ]{60}
[22:40] <Mask_de_GM> The group of grubby bastards explode in a shower of incredibly colorful gore. This attracts the three smaller groups turn towards you
[22:41] <Aria> "Bring it on!"
[22:41] <Mask_de_GM> You also hear a booming voice: "Giving away your position like that? Not very wise of you..."
[22:42] * Aria gives a mental shrug.
[22:42] <Aria> "Sometimes shock and awe works wonders."
[22:43] <Mask_de_GM> "So true"
[22:43] <Mask_de_GM> A flash of sickly green light speeds towards your position
[22:43] * GX (wintermute12@Nightstar-53d70a6c.dsl.look.ca) has joined #valhalla
[22:43] <Mask_de_GM> roll 1d20+6
[22:43] <Dicesaurus> Mask_de_GM rolled 1d20+6 --> [ 1d20=12 ]{18}
[22:43] <Mask_de_GM> Touch AC?
[22:44] <Aria> 19
[22:44] <Aria> No, 18
[22:44] <Aria> I forget I don't have Exlusive Target anymore
[22:45] <Mask_de_GM> Just hits
[22:45] * Iori (House@Nightstar-9240a88c.irvnca.pacbell.net) has joined #valhalla
[22:45] <Aria> Indeed
[22:45] <Mask_de_GM> You attempt to danmaku dodge it, but it catches you right on the edge of your hitbox
[22:45] <Mask_de_GM> roll 1d12+3
[22:45] <Dicesaurus> Mask_de_GM rolled 1d12+3 --> [ 1d12=9 ]{12}
[22:45] <Mask_de_GM> rending a noticeable line of red on your cheek
[22:46] <Aria> Out of curiosity, was that a ray, orb, or line?
[22:46] <Mask_de_GM> The closest grubby bastards start to climb on top of the stall, trying to grab you by the ankles.
[22:46] <Mask_de_GM> and line
[22:46] <Aria> roll 1d100 20% miss chance
[22:46] <Dicesaurus> Aria rolled 1d100 20% miss chance --> [ 1d100=63 ]{63}
[22:47] <Aria> Hits me still
[22:47] <Mask_de_GM> ah, Graze the Bullet
[22:47] <Mask_de_GM> give me a Reflex save
[22:47] <Aria> roll 1d20+9 Ref save
[22:47] <Dicesaurus> Aria rolled 1d20+9 Ref save --> [ 1d20=15 ]{24}
[22:48] <Mask_de_GM> You kick away the nasty little buggers that get close enough to grab on, while others just plain miss
[22:48] <Mask_de_GM> Hypo, care to do anything?
[22:48] <Mask_de_GM> a lot of the grubby bastards are moving away from you
[22:49] <Mask_de_GM> what do
[22:49] <Mask_de_GM> Hypolita?
[22:50] <Mask_de_GM> hello?
[22:50] <Hypolita> I'd like to start throwing eldritch blasts, if I can
[22:50] <Hypolita> actually, no.
[22:50] <Hypolita> better than that
[22:51] <Hypolita> I'll use Call Fiend to call in a tiefling Conduit3 with the Electric sphere (adv), if I can
[22:52] <Mask_de_GM> Odds or Evens
[22:52] <Hypolita> odds
[22:53] <Mask_de_GM> roll 1d6
[22:53] <Dicesaurus> Mask_de_GM rolled 1d6 --> [ 1d6=6 ]{6}
[22:53] <Mask_de_GM> You think of summoning a shitkicker but that {OBJECT} just has such a nice {TERTIARY SEXUAL CHARACTERISTIC}
[22:53] <Mask_de_GM> it distracts you for six short seconds
[22:53] <Hypolita> lol, ok. damn
[22:53] <Mask_de_GM> Aria, bring the boom-boom
[22:54] <Aria> Bringin' it.
[22:54] <Mask_de_GM> the grubby bastards are pretty clumped together
[22:54] <Aria> roll 1d20+6 Ranged touch
[22:54] <Dicesaurus> Aria rolled 1d20+6 Ranged touch --> [ 1d20=18 ]{24}
[22:54] <Mask_de_GM> damage
[22:54] <Aria> roll 6d6+36 damage
[22:54] <Dicesaurus> Aria rolled 6d6+36 damage --> [ 6d6=14 ]{50}
[22:55] <Mask_de_GM> The stickies blow up more and more stuff, sending the grubby bastards rolling and making cracks against the ever present darkness
[22:55] <Mask_de_GM> But the more you shoot, the more seem to come
[22:56] <Aria> Right-o. I'll port straight over the tub, then
[22:56] <Aria> Next turn we'll see if we can seal it
[22:56] <Aria> (either that or I'll blow it wide open. That would be exciting)
[22:57] <Mask_de_GM> you...kind of don't know where the tub it
[22:57] <Mask_de_GM> It seems to have disappeared
[22:57] <Mask_de_GM> the whole room is really different looking
[22:57] <Mask_de_GM> strangely so
[22:58] <Aria> Hmm. Are they boiling out of anywhere in particular?
[22:59] <Mask_de_GM> They seem to be sprouting out of the ground
[22:59] <Mask_de_GM> like fucked up beets
[22:59] <Aria> Damn ground. I never liked it to begin with.
[22:59] <Aria> Is there a door to this room? Or is the hole in the floor still there?
[23:00] <Hypolita> *is sitting in her comfy chair enjoying her {object of perverse half orc lust]*
[23:00] * Tyrone (nsJChat@Nightstar-5c7a40b7.ca.comcast.net) has joined #valhalla
[23:01] <Aria> Welcome back
[23:01] <Tyrone> Thanks.
[23:01] <Mask_de_GM> You hear a booming laugh inside of your mind as an {OBJECT OF INTENSE DESIRE} appears in front of you, tantalizingly out of reach
[23:01] <Mask_de_GM> and welcome back Tyrone
[23:02] <Zine> (Mmmm.... Chocolate)
[23:02] <Hypolita> "OOH! Magically animated severed tentacle! want!"
[23:03] <Tyrone> roll 1d20
[23:03] <Dicesaurus> Tyrone rolled 1d20 --> [ 1d20=4 ]{4}
[23:03] <Tyrone> +4 so 8
[23:03] <Hypolita> I'll be honest, you can pretty much just assume that she's specifically orienting her thoughts towards which ever desires have the best chance of creeping my headvoice out
[23:03] <Mask_de_GM> Aria
[23:03] <Mask_de_GM> lol
[23:04] <Mask_de_GM> Aria sees an {OBJECT OF INTENSE DESIRE}
[23:04] <Tyrone> Alright, I'm going to make a justice speech.
[23:04] <Mask_de_GM> not now god dammit
[23:04] <Tyrone> Oh
[23:04] <Tyrone> Oops
[23:04] <Mask_de_GM> nobody lets me finish talking :T
[23:04] <Hypolita> should have been "mr. headvoice" but "my headvoice" works too...
[23:04] <Mask_de_GM> Reflex save, Aria
[23:04] <Aria> (sorry)
[23:04] <Aria> roll 1d20+9 Ref save
[23:04] <Dicesaurus> Aria rolled 1d20+9 Ref save --> [ 1d20=10 ]{19}
[23:05] <Mask_de_GM> The grubby bastards come up short yet again, but the tears in {WHATEVER ARIA IS WEARING} show that they're getting closer and closer to success
[23:05] <Mask_de_GM> Hypo, what do
[23:06] <Hypolita> try to call again
[23:06] <Mask_de_GM> odds or evens?
[23:06] <Hypolita> evens
[23:06] <Mask_de_GM> roll 1d6
[23:06] <Dicesaurus> Mask_de_GM rolled 1d6 --> [ 1d6=1 ]{1}
[23:06] <Mask_de_GM> :V
[23:06] <Aria> Heh
[23:06] <Hypolita> fuck!
[23:07] <Aria> The dice are really with us tonight
[23:07] <Aria> Beating us with sticks
[23:07] <Mask_de_GM> That Disembodied tentacle with the nice {TERTIARY SEXUAL CHARACTERISTIC} is just too damned interesting.
[23:07] <Hypolita> "You can handle these guys, right Ariaaaaa-umm..."
[23:07] <Mask_de_GM> now you can come in Tyrone
[23:08] <Tyrone> "FOUL BENTACLED FIENDS!"
[23:08] <Mask_de_GM> Tyrone, gimme a Will save
[23:08] <Tyrone> Do I jump through the hole first?
[23:09] <Mask_de_GM> yeah
[23:09] <Mask_de_GM> it won't kill you
[23:09] <Tyrone> I do so, my cape saving me from any fall damage anyway.
[23:09] <Aria> It will just be very distracting
[23:09] <Aria> In all the right ways
[23:09] <Mask_de_GM> yep
[23:09] <Mask_de_GM> roll me a Will save
[23:09] <Dicesaurus> Mask_de_GM rolled me a Will save --> error: malformed expression
[23:10] <Tyrone> "Unhand the maiden, by the name of the Lady or I will shove your squiggly appendages up whatever you poop out of!"
[23:10] <Tyrone> roll 1d20+7
[23:10] <Dicesaurus> Tyrone rolled 1d20+7 --> [ 1d20=16 ]{23}
[23:10] <Tyrone> That looks like it should win.
[23:11] <Tyrone> What are we fighting anyway?
[23:11] <Mask_de_GM> When Tyrone jumps through the hole and makes his speech, he notices a half ruined bathroom, a nasty beastie shaping some sort of spell shit, a Half-orc sitting on a grubby bastard and staring at nothing, and a floating Eladrin dropping bombs
[23:11] <Mask_de_GM> something which just got a lot less dangerious
[23:11] <Mask_de_GM> *dangerous
[23:12] <Tyrone> I attack the beasty!
[23:12] <Mask_de_GM> Alright, roll'em
[23:12] <Tyrone> I have two BABs, does that mean I get two attack and do I roll twice then?
[23:13] <Mask_de_GM> but first, are you packing something with reach?
[23:13] <Tyrone> No
[23:13] <Tyrone> But I can jump
[23:13] <Mask_de_GM> ah, a word from our sponsor: Attacks of Opportunity
[23:13] <Mask_de_GM> roll 1d20+12
[23:13] <Dicesaurus> Mask_de_GM rolled 1d20+12 --> [ 1d20=13 ]{25}
[23:13] <Tyrone> Sheet
[23:14] <Tyrone> What is attacking me, the Eladrin or the beasty?
[23:14] <Aria> Beastie
[23:14] <Mask_de_GM> Do you really only have 12 AC
[23:14] <Mask_de_GM> and Beastie
[23:14] <Aria> I just looked at that too, Mask
[23:14] <Aria> How does a Paladin only have 12 AC?
[23:14] <Aria> Are you not wearing armor of any kind?
[23:14] <Mask_de_GM> What happened to the shield?
[23:14] <Tyrone> Oops, I copy pasted from my old char
[23:15] <Tyrone> And forgot to change that
[23:15] <Aria> And breastplate
[23:15] <Mask_de_GM> yeah, is your actual AC better than 25?
[23:15] <Tyrone> Lemme check
[23:15] <Tyrone> It's 10+Con+Armor, right?
[23:15] <Tyrone> +Dex?
[23:15] <Zine> (Dex)
[23:15] <Mask_de_GM> dex
[23:16] <Tyrone> Just Dex? Okay
[23:16] <Tyrone> Damn it d20srd is slow
[23:17] <Aria> Tome Breastplate is 5 armor, steel shield is 2.
[23:17] <Aria> Total of 21
[23:17] <Tyrone> 21 AC, I'll change that then.
[23:17] <Mask_de_GM> Alright, not quite
[23:18] <Tyrone> Is the Eladrin attacking us right now?
[23:18] <Mask_de_GM> No, the tentacled dude is
[23:18] <Tyrone> Eladrin on our side?
[23:18] <Aria> That's me
[23:18] <Aria> So yes
[23:18] <Tyrone> Eladrin as in... elf? Or angel?
[23:18] <Mask_de_GM> You get smacked in the face, tentacle hitting you with nasty little pinpricks
[23:18] <Mask_de_GM> Fortitude save please
[23:19] <Aria> It's one of the good outsiders. I'm not actually an Eladrin, I just look a LOT like one.
[23:19] <Tyrone> 1d20+4
[23:19] <Tyrone> roll 1d20+4
[23:19] <Dicesaurus> Tyrone rolled 1d20+4 --> [ 1d20=6 ]{10}
[23:19] <Mask_de_GM> oy
[23:19] <Tyrone> =_=
[23:19] <Mask_de_GM> roll 1d6+8
[23:19] <Dicesaurus> Mask_de_GM rolled 1d6+8 --> [ 1d6=4 ]{12}
[23:19] <Tyrone> Fffffffff-
[23:19] <Tyrone> -FFFUUUUU-
[23:19] <Aria> Side note, you'll get DR 5/critical hit from the breastplate
[23:20] <Tyrone> Damn, I forgot about tome effects.
[23:20] * NSJavaGuest-7627 (nsJChat@A2BA3E.CCFB1E.8240C8.13625D) has joined #valhalla
[23:20] <Mask_de_GM> It sends your head back with a snap; sending a slimy sensation running across your skin
[23:20] * NSJavaGuest-7627 is now known as Andrew_Jackson
[23:20] <Mask_de_GM> Did it just get dryer in here or is it just you?
[23:20] <Tyrone> Can I still attack?
[23:20] <Mask_de_GM> {Tyrone has been Slimed}
[23:20] <Mask_de_GM> yeah
[23:21] <Tyrone> I ask again, does two BABs mean two attacks and do I roll twice then?
[23:21] <Mask_de_GM> Yeah
[23:21] <Aria> Yes - you'd roll twice. Once acting as if you had +6 BAB, and again as if you had +1
[23:22] <Mask_de_GM> welcome back AJ
[23:22] <Andrew_Jackson> Thanks
[23:22] <Tyrone> I also have TWF which I dunno why I still have, can I attack with my shield?
[23:22] <Tyrone> As well, I mean
[23:22] <Andrew_Jackson> sidenote, is english your second language, GoA, or are you just 12?
[23:22] <Mask_de_GM> sure, what the hell
[23:22] <Mask_de_GM> I don't care
[23:22] <Tyrone> I type fast and make frequent mistakes because of it
[23:22] <Andrew_Jackson> but other than that, just tell me when I can jump in
[23:22] <Mask_de_GM> TWF gets you extra attacks with your off hand, so you'd get Sword 6/Sword 1/Shield 6/Shield 1
[23:23] <Mask_de_GM> and odds or evens AJ
[23:23] <Tyrone> roll 1d20+6
[23:23] <Dicesaurus> Tyrone rolled 1d20+6 --> [ 1d20=15 ]{21}
[23:23] <Andrew_Jackson> odds
[23:23] <Mask_de_GM> that's a hit
[23:23] <Mask_de_GM> roll 1d6
[23:23] <Dicesaurus> Mask_de_GM rolled 1d6 --> [ 1d6=4 ]{4}
[23:23] <Tyrone> roll 1d20+1
[23:23] <Dicesaurus> Tyrone rolled 1d20+1 --> [ 1d20=20 ]{21}
[23:23] <Mask_de_GM> :V
[23:23] <Mask_de_GM> that's a crit, fuck confirming
[23:23] <Tyrone> roll 1d20+6
[23:23] <Dicesaurus> Tyrone rolled 1d20+6 --> [ 1d20=19 ]{25}
[23:23] <Mask_de_GM> a hit
[23:23] <Tyrone> roll 1d20+1
[23:23] <Dicesaurus> Tyrone rolled 1d20+1 --> [ 1d20=9 ]{10}
[23:23] <Mask_de_GM> and miss
[23:24] <Tyrone> I Smite that mother fucker with my first hit.
[23:24] <Mask_de_GM> Kiai?
[23:24] <Tyrone> Yes
[23:24] <Mask_de_GM> Okay, roll for the Smite sword, the crit Shield, and the regular sword
[23:24] <Mask_de_GM> damage
[23:26] <Tyrone> roll 1d8
[23:26] <Dicesaurus> Tyrone rolled 1d8 --> [ 1d8=3 ]{3}
[23:26] <Tyrone> Wait, do I add Str?
[23:26] <Mask_de_GM> Yeah
[23:26] <Mask_de_GM> have...you played D&D before GoA?
[23:26] <Tyrone> 10 damage
[23:27] <Tyrone> Very infrequently
[23:27] <Mask_de_GM> for the Smite?
[23:27] <Tyrone> Yes
[23:27] <Tyrone> roll 1d8
[23:27] <Dicesaurus> Tyrone rolled 1d8 --> [ 1d8=6 ]{6}
[23:27] <Tyrone> 8
[23:27] <Tyrone> roll 1d3+2
[23:27] <Dicesaurus> Tyrone rolled 1d3+2 --> [ 1d3=3 ]{5}
[23:27] <Tyrone> 20
[23:27] <Aria> I don't even really know what to say
[23:27] <Tyrone> I did bad?
[23:28] <Andrew_Jackson> Are you sure you've played D&D before, GoA?
[23:28] <Andrew_Jackson> Questions like "Do I add strength to damage" are a bit odd to hear from denners
[23:28] <Tyrone> I'm fluff obsessed
[23:28] <Hypolita> that's kind of obvious
[23:28] <Hypolita> looking at your characters, I mean
[23:29] <Tyrone> Rules kick me in balls.
[23:29] <Tyrone> I love reading materials.
[23:29] <Tyrone> Provided on the den
[23:29] <Tyrone> I forget how I found the place.
[23:29] <Mask_de_GM> GoA, the Smite should be 2d8+Str, the Shield is 2d3+Str, and the other sword is 1d8+Str
[23:29] <Tyrone> I'm hoping to learn my playing.
[23:30] <Tyrone> Fuck fuck
[23:30] <Mask_de_GM> that would've been nice to know beforehand man
[23:30] <GX> (Maybe you should watch some games, or read logs or something.)
[23:30] <Hypolita> do you want me to go over your sheet and correct and simplify it for you, man?
[23:30] <Tyrone> roll 2d8+2
[23:30] <Dicesaurus> Tyrone rolled 2d8+2 --> [ 2d8=10 ]{12}
[23:30] <Tyrone> roll 2d3+2
[23:30] <Dicesaurus> Tyrone rolled 2d3+2 --> [ 2d3=5 ]{7}
[23:30] <Tyrone> roll 1d8+2
[23:30] <Dicesaurus> Tyrone rolled 1d8+2 --> [ 1d8=6 ]{8}
[23:31] <Tyrone> And no.
[23:31] <Hypolita> alright
[23:31] <Mask_de_GM> The smirking face of the tentacle thing is quickly met with a wicked slash-smash-slash combo, drawing black ichor from their wounds
[23:32] <Mask_de_GM> Aria, you're up as the beast reels back, screaming obscenities in everyone's mind
[23:33] <Aria> What does Aria see GoA doing?
[23:34] <Mask_de_GM> Aria sees Tyrone striking a blow against a being of pure terror, which flickers for a split second into the tentacled being in the bathtub like before
[23:34] <Mask_de_GM> then returns to your regularly scheduled horror
[23:35] <Aria> Well, anything that makes the voices in my head scream in pain is good by me.
[23:36] <Aria> I'll lob stickies its way, exceptional aim to avoid blowing this stranger out of the tower
[23:36] <Mask_de_GM> Alright
[23:36] <Aria> roll 1d20+6 Ranged touch attack
[23:36] <Dicesaurus> Aria rolled 1d20+6 Ranged touch attack --> [ 1d20=3 ]{9}
[23:36] <Aria> And miss1
[23:36] <Aria> !
[23:36] <Mask_de_GM> actually...odds or evens
[23:36] <Aria> Odds
[23:36] <Mask_de_GM> roll 1d6
[23:36] <Dicesaurus> Mask_de_GM rolled 1d6 --> [ 1d6=5 ]{5}
[23:36] <Aria> Wow. We actually made one of those
[23:37] <Mask_de_GM> got it. They land around the tentacle dude
[23:37] <Tyrone> "Shut the foul words of your black depths! I will hear no more of you obscene vows!"
[23:37] <Mask_de_GM> don't hit him, but are still active
[23:38] <Hypolita> (In other news, I just statted up the fiend I'm trying to call. Used the character creation rules, but at 3rd level, and only two items)
[23:38] <Mask_de_GM> "Heh, lucky shot human, but I shall win this day" the monster snarks into Tyrone's mind
[23:39] <Tyrone> "Lucky shot? Lucky shot!? Justice will prevail if not this day then when the tide of the opressed innocent rise up to blot out your sight with the wave of their bodies and crush you!"
[23:39] <Aria> "Stranger! Back away and I'll blow this monster a new hole!"
[23:39] <Mask_de_GM> as he sends a glob of black force at Aria, attempting to force her to the ceiling
[23:39] <Mask_de_GM> Give me a Will save
[23:39] <Aria> roll 1d20+3 Will save
[23:39] <Dicesaurus> Aria rolled 1d20+3 Will save --> [ 1d20=16 ]{19}
[23:39] <Tyrone> I jump back 10 feet.
[23:40] <Aria> Take that, sickened condition.
[23:40] <Mask_de_GM> {not your turn yet Tyrone}
[23:40] <Tyrone> When it's my turn
[23:40] <Mask_de_GM> Aria gets hit full force by the restrictive glob, as it passes harmlessly through her. It wasn't real
[23:40] <Mask_de_GM> Like, at all
[23:41] <Mask_de_GM> The grubby bastards make one last leap for Aria's legs and Reflex save
[23:41] <Aria> roll 1d20+9 Ref save
[23:41] <Dicesaurus> Aria rolled 1d20+9 Ref save --> [ 1d20=20 ]{29}
[23:41] <Aria> BAM
[23:41] <Mask_de_GM> There we go
[23:42] <Mask_de_GM> You easily dodge the jumping dudes, sticking a few Stickies on their backs on the way down
[23:42] <Mask_de_GM> They fall down go boom
[23:43] <Aria> "HA-ha! Now we're cooking!"
[23:43] <Mask_de_GM> Hypo, what do?
[23:44] <Tyrone> "Burn as you will in the fires of Baator, mind-rendering villain!"
[23:44] <Hypolita> throw an eldritch at the enemy
[23:44] <Mask_de_GM> While sitting?
[23:44] <Hypolita> yep
[23:44] <Mask_de_GM> There we go, I was waiting for that
[23:44] <Mask_de_GM> gimme a touch attack roll
[23:44] <Hypolita> roll 1d20+6
[23:44] <Dicesaurus> Hypolita rolled 1d20+6 --> [ 1d20=10 ]{16}
[23:44] <Mask_de_GM> Hit
[23:44] <Mask_de_GM> damage
[23:44] <Hypolita> roll 6d6
[23:44] <Dicesaurus> Hypolita rolled 6d6 --> [ 6d6=28 ]{28}
[23:45] <Mask_de_GM> The tentacled being grins an evil grin as it bears down on Tyrone. Said grin gets a hole blown through it from the lance of flaming hatred that Hypolita looses
[23:46] <Mask_de_GM> The grin turns into a scowl, "WHAT ARE YOU DOING, WHELP?!"
[23:46] <Hypolita> "Fuck your shit!"
[23:46] <Mask_de_GM> Tyrone, you're up
[23:46] <Mask_de_GM> take us home
[23:47] <Tyrone> I'm busy correcting myself, "Or is is the abyss? Tell me, which plane will you go to upon death? Never mind, you'll find out." I attack, of course.
[23:47] <Mask_de_GM> Full attack?
[23:47] <Tyrone> You got it
[23:47] <Mask_de_GM> gimme them attack rolls
[23:47] <Tyrone> roll 1d20+6
[23:47] <Dicesaurus> Tyrone rolled 1d20+6 --> [ 1d20=10 ]{16}
[23:47] <Tyrone> roll 1d20+1
[23:47] <Dicesaurus> Tyrone rolled 1d20+1 --> [ 1d20=7 ]{8}
[23:47] <Mask_de_GM> miss
[23:47] <Mask_de_GM> miss
[23:47] <Tyrone> roll 1d20+6
[23:47] <Dicesaurus> Tyrone rolled 1d20+6 --> [ 1d20=8 ]{14}
[23:47] <Mask_de_GM> miss
[23:47] <Tyrone> roll 1d20+1
[23:47] <Dicesaurus> Tyrone rolled 1d20+1 --> [ 1d20=11 ]{12}
[23:48] <Tyrone> Well
[23:48] <Aria> I feel I should mention to you to at some point that you get Str to attacks
[23:48] <Mask_de_GM> Your blows swing wide as your skin starts to slough and turn...wait
[23:48] <Mask_de_GM> son of a
[23:49] <Tyrone> That would mean my first one could hit if anything
[23:49] <Mask_de_GM> The 14 and the 10 hit with your +2 to strength
[23:49] <Mask_de_GM> and the ll
[23:49] <Mask_de_GM> 11
[23:49] <Tyrone> 16
[23:49] <Tyrone> Oh wait, way up there?
[23:50] <Mask_de_GM> I mean the 16
[23:50] <Mask_de_GM> derp
[23:50] <Tyrone> Roll for damage for everything but my second sword swing?
[23:50] <Dicesaurus> Tyrone rolled for damage for everything but my second sword swing? --> error: malformed expression
[23:50] <Mask_de_GM> swording damage
[23:50] <Mask_de_GM> nah, only one hits
[23:50] <Andrew_Jackson> Can we just run with GoA missing until he learns to do his own math?
[23:50] <Mask_de_GM> I can't count
[23:51] <Tyrone> roll 1d8+2
[23:51] <Dicesaurus> Tyrone rolled 1d8+2 --> [ 1d8=7 ]{9}
[23:51] <Mask_de_GM> I fucked up my math too, and the fight's (and with it, the session) are almost over
[23:51] <Andrew_Jackson> It's fucking addition. 6 bab, 2 magic, 2 strength = +10 mod, +5 mod
[23:51] <Tyrone> Fuck, the magic enhancements
[23:51] <Andrew_Jackson> seriously, it's not that fucking hard
[23:51] <Mask_de_GM> Tyrone takes a whirling strike made of mathematical errors and draws more black ichor
[23:52] <Mask_de_GM> The sheer numerical failure brings Andrew Jackson screaming through a wall and into action
[23:52] <Hypolita> dude, if I'm looking for shit to do tomorrow, I'm totally going over your sheet, because apparently you just have stuff all over the place or something.
[23:52] <Hypolita> if you use it, great, if not, not my fault
[23:52] <Mask_de_GM> AJ, take us home
[23:52] <Tyrone> I think my sheet is fine, it's my ability to remember anything on it that is faulty
[23:53] <Andrew_Jackson> I don't even know what's going on, but I'm going to charge in and smite something.
[23:53] <Mask_de_GM> Alright, roll dem bones
[23:53] <Andrew_Jackson> roll 1d20+17 charge smite
[23:53] <Dicesaurus> Andrew_Jackson rolled 1d20+17 charge smite --> [ 1d20=15 ]{32}
[23:53] <Mask_de_GM> Hit
[23:53] <Mask_de_GM> damage
[23:53] <Hypolita> whatever... I'm just led to believe that you don't have full stats for attack and AC listed or something
[23:53] <Andrew_Jackson> roll 1d8+30 damage
[23:53] <Dicesaurus> Andrew_Jackson rolled 1d8+30 damage --> [ 1d8=3 ]{33}
[23:53] <Andrew_Jackson> oh, and smite destruction clause as usual
[23:54] <Andrew_Jackson> so, if it had 57 hp or less, it dies
[23:54] <Mask_de_GM> With a blur of light and a scream of GINGERBEARD MAN MOTHERBITCHES you slam into the tentacled monstrosity, tearing it neatly in twain
[23:54] <Mask_de_GM> It burns away into the light, which shatters the illusion overtaking your comrades' senses
[23:55] <Aria> "Sooo... do you still want the bathroom, Hypo?"
[23:55] <Mask_de_GM> bringing the room back to it's (totaled) normal state
[23:55] <Hypolita> "Eh, I can still fix it up."
[23:55] <Mask_de_GM> Hypolita falls on her ass, the chair, footstool, and {OBJECT OF DESIRE} now gone
[23:56] <Mask_de_GM> the grubby bastards, now without a leader, stand knock kneed and scared
[23:56] <Mask_de_GM> what do
[23:56] <Mask_de_GM> *Victory Music*
[23:56] <Andrew_Jackson> "I'M THE GINGERBREAD BITCHES RUN IN FEAR!"
[23:56] <Hypolita> "aww..."
[23:56] <Mask_de_GM> Meanwhile, Tyrone is kind of melting in front of you
[23:56] <Mask_de_GM> at least his skin is
[23:56] <Mask_de_GM> it's turning clear
[23:57] * Tyrone (nsJChat@Nightstar-5c7a40b7.ca.comcast.net) Quit ([NS] Quit: Nightstar's Java Chat http://www.nightstar.net)
[23:57] <Mask_de_GM> you might want to do something about that
[23:57] <Aria> "Oh damn. Andrew, you got this one?"
[23:57] <Mask_de_GM> ...
[23:57] <Hypolita> "Huh."
[23:57] <Mask_de_GM> {somebody got Remove Curse?}
[23:57] <Mask_de_GM> {Or Remove Ragequit?}
[23:57] <Aria> Andrew does have Remove Curse
[23:57] <Andrew_Jackson> yeah, I was checking that
[23:57] <Andrew_Jackson> I'll remove curse
[23:57] <Hypolita> (what the....)
[23:57] <Mask_de_GM> cool
[23:57] <Hypolita> (ok then.)
[23:58] <Mask_de_GM> Tyrone's skin returns to normal
[23:58] <Mask_de_GM> and he sort of pops
[23:58] <Mask_de_GM> disappears
[23:58] <Hypolita> (may be my fault)
[23:58] <Mask_de_GM> off to have more wacky math misadventures
[23:59] <Mask_de_GM> You are suddenly aware that you can save in a bathroom
[23:59] <Hypolita> Or get his knob polished by the goddess of his order or something
[23:59] <Mask_de_GM> but you have to use it first
[23:59] <Hypolita> [SAVE]
[23:59] * NSJavaGuest-1252 (nsJChat@Nightstar-5c7a40b7.ca.comcast.net) has joined #valhalla
[23:59] <Mask_de_GM> You all make use of the facilities, and the screen gets covered with toilet paper
[23:59] <Mask_de_GM> [Saving, don't turn off the power...Save Complete!]
more wacky math misadventures
[23:59] <Mask_de_GM> You are suddenly aware that you can save in a bathroom
[23:59] <Hypolita> Or get his knob polished by the goddess of his order or something
[23:59] <Mask_de_GM> but you have to use it first
[23:59] <Hypolita> [SAVE]
[23:59] * NSJavaGuest-1252 (nsJChat@Nightstar-5c7a40b7.ca.comcast.net) has joined #valhalla
[23:59] <Mask_de_GM> You all make use of the facilities, and the screen gets covered with toilet paper
[23:59] <Mask_de_GM> [Saving, don't turn off the power...Save Complete!]
Session Time: Tue Aug 10 00:00:00 2010
[00:00] <Mask_de_GM> good game folks
[00:00] * NSJavaGuest-1252 is now known as Tyrone
[00:00] <Hypolita> it was fun
[00:00] <Mask_de_GM> that was odd
[00:00] <Andrew_Jackson> see you again next week

[For Valor]

I just read exactly 4 hours of IRC text... oog. Eyesight. Fuzzy.

[ubernoob]

Request: Since it doesn't look like we'll be leveling for a while, can I trade in my attune sphere feat for whirlwind and my kasuri-gama for a lance?