Moments when a piece of entertainment completely rocked you.

[radthemad4]

Oh yes, I understand what you are talking about, and short answer, there is an in universe explanation that could explain that, but it is actually kind of dumb, because it makes no sense for him to be walking and recruiting mutants, and also I think he might have been buddy with Magneto in that scene or something?

Yeah, they seemed to be on pretty good terms there if I recall correctly.

Well, in one of the cartoon versions of the Days of Future Past story line the professor gets a pair of cyborg legs (well, more like really fancy leg braces) that make him able to walk again, could be something like that.

Wolverine and the X-men right? Ah, okay so those two share source material. Hmm... the future segments in that show were post apocalyptic, and the future was alterable based on the season finale.

However, if the Professor somehow had functional prosthetic legs (in the cartoon he was in 'the future' so it's understandable), there's no reason for him to stop using them later on.

Basically everyone just pretends X3 never happened because it was terrible and we ignore all continuity issues with that movie.

-Username17

Probably the best idea.

[hyzmarca]

He walks early on in Days of Future Past, too, in the 70s portion.

The drug that lets him walk dampens his telepathic abilities, though. So it's a tradeoff. He gets to pick his legs or his powers, but not both.

In X-3 we can assume that he was using a similar drug with less potent side effects. He would have stopped taking it because relying on diminished psychic powers isn't really a good idea when you've got the Phoenix living with you.

[Maj]

Last night's Last Week Tonight featured this gem that slayed me. John Oliver, I commend you. {Explicit Lyrics, NSFW}

[Prak]

Amazing.

[darkmaster]

Well, in one of the cartoon versions of the Days of Future Past story line the professor gets a pair of cyborg legs (well, more like really fancy leg braces) that make him able to walk again, could be something like that.

Wolverine and the X-men right? Ah, okay so those two share source material. Hmm... the future segments in that show were post apocalyptic, and the future was alterable based on the season finale.

Yeah, the Days of Future Past arc is basically one of the two or three X-men scenarios that gets adapted. You get the inital arc with the X-men fighting the sentinels and the dark brotherhood up until Cable and/or black cable Bishop (whoever we have the rights too at the moment) start fucking about. You have the "stop the robot apocalypse arc" and then you've got the stuff with Apocalypse with a capitol A because that is a name. It is actually what ancient Egyptian god mutant calls himself.

Anyway.

This happened, and there is going to be a second one. It is impossible to express how awesome it is that these two characters totally live in the same universe.

[Count Arioch the 28th]

I saw Maleficent the other day. I thought it was kind of hardcore for PG (more like a PG-13 to me), but I enjoyed it.

[Maxus]

I'm reading the omnibus of the Night Lords, by Aaron Dembski-Bowden (Warhammer 40k).

I really, really like the take on them. They're Chaos Space Marines, sure, but they're also fighting to hang onto some of their pride and dignity. And I like how the lead, Talos, can still talk to a human like another person. I'm on the second book and he had a chat with the Navigator about...random topics. She admitted that being the Navigator for an Astartes vessel is something every Navigator hopes for, and she got her wish (sort of). He says when he was a kid, he wanted to be a hero, and look how THAT turned out.

[Ancient History]

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IGqeyQhBPMI

[Meikle641]

Edge of Tomorrow was pretty damn cool. Then again, I'm a sucker for time loop stories.

[Prak]

So glad Fox News created this new system, otherwise these threats to national security may have gone unrecognized.

[darkmaster]

Well, the joker is a terrorist. So... one out of fifteen isn't bad.

[Prak]

Huh. Thought I put this in Image Macros. Oh well.

Of course, while the Joker is a terrorist, he is also, notably, the person on there least known for wearing a beard.

[AndreiChekov]

I saw Maleficent the other day. I thought it was kind of hardcore for PG (more like a PG-13 to me), but I enjoyed it.

I saw the best ever maleficent cosplay the other day. I asked her out, but she said no. :*(

[Count Arioch the 28th]

I saw Maleficent the other day. I thought it was kind of hardcore for PG (more like a PG-13 to me), but I enjoyed it.

I saw the best ever maleficent cosplay the other day. I asked her out, but she said no. :*(

Ah, lame! Props for at least trying though.

[Maxus]

Finished the Night Lords Omnibus.

I'm not a huge Warhammer 40k fan, but I genuinely enjoyed that.

It does help that all the setting stuff is online so by the power of Google and Wiki, all things may be clarified.

[Avoraciopoctules]

http://konjakonjak.tumblr.com/post/8209 ... feedback-i

This game looks so damn cool. When was the last time I played an Iconoclasts demo, a couple years ago? Hope there's something playable before too long.

[Avoraciopoctules]

http://www.antipope.org/charlie/blog-st ... -time.html

[K]

The E3 trailer for The Division kind of blew me away. I won't play the game, but whoever made that trailer either needs to get all the moneys or kicked soundly in the reproductive organs.

[Count Arioch the 28th]

I am actually kind of liking Diablo 3 lately.

[Chamomile]

The E3 trailer for The Division kind of blew me away. I won't play the game, but whoever made that trailer either needs to get all the moneys or kicked soundly in the reproductive organs.

I want to play that game. Not the actual game they're making, which will most definitely fail to live up to the promise of the trailer, because that is how E3 trailers do. But the game they're advertising? I want that.

[Prak]

Something I found on tumblr

I was shooting heroin and reading “The Fountainhead” in the front seat of my privately owned police cruiser when a call came in. I put a quarter in the radio to activate it. It was the chief.
“Bad news, detective. We got a situation.”
“What? Is the mayor trying to ban trans fats again?”
“Worse. Somebody just stole four hundred and forty-seven million dollars’ worth of bitcoins.”
The heroin needle practically fell out of my arm. “What kind of monster would do something like that? Bitcoins are the ultimate currency: virtual, anonymous, stateless. They represent true economic freedom, not subject to arbitrary manipulation by any government. Do we have any leads?”
“Not yet. But mark my words: we’re going to figure out who did this and we’re going to take them down … provided someone pays us a fair market rate to do so.”
“Easy, chief,” I said. “Any rate the market offers is, by definition, fair.”
He laughed. “That’s why you’re the best I got, Lisowski. Now you get out there and find those bitcoins.”
“Don’t worry,” I said. “I’m on it.”
I put a quarter in the siren. Ten minutes later, I was on the scene. It was a normal office building, strangled on all sides by public sidewalks. I hopped over them and went inside.
“Home Depot™ Presents the Police!®” I said, flashing my badge and my gun and a small picture of Ron Paul. “Nobody move unless you want to!” They didn’t.
“Now, which one of you punks is going to pay me to investigate this crime?” No one spoke up.
“Come on,” I said. “Don’t you all understand that the protection of private property is the foundation of all personal liberty?”
It didn’t seem like they did.
“Seriously, guys. Without a strong economic motivator, I’m just going to stand here and not solve this case. Cash is fine, but I prefer being paid in gold bullion or autographed Penn Jillette posters.”
Nothing. These people were stonewalling me. It almost seemed like they didn’t care that a fortune in computer money invented to buy drugs was missing.
I figured I could wait them out. I lit several cigarettes indoors. A pregnant lady coughed, and I told her that secondhand smoke is a myth. Just then, a man in glasses made a break for it.
“Subway™ Eat Fresh and Freeze, Scumbag!®” I yelled.
Too late. He was already out the front door. I went after him.
“Stop right there!” I yelled as I ran. He was faster than me because I always try to avoid stepping on public sidewalks. Our country needs a private-sidewalk voucher system, but, thanks to the incestuous interplay between our corrupt federal government and the public-sidewalk lobby, it will never happen.
I was losing him. “Listen, I’ll pay you to stop!” I yelled. “What would you consider an appropriate price point for stopping? I’ll offer you a thirteenth of an ounce of gold and a gently worn ‘Bob Barr ‘08’ extra-large long-sleeved men’s T-shirt!”
He turned. In his hand was a revolver that the Constitution said he had every right to own. He fired at me and missed. I pulled my own gun, put a quarter in it, and fired back. The bullet lodged in a U.S.P.S. mailbox less than a foot from his head. I shot the mailbox again, on purpose.
“All right, all right!” the man yelled, throwing down his weapon. “I give up, cop! I confess: I took the bitcoins.”
“Why’d you do it?” I asked, as I slapped a pair of Oikos™ Greek Yogurt Presents Handcuffs® on the guy.
“Because I was afraid.”
“Afraid?”
“Afraid of an economic future free from the pernicious meddling of central bankers,” he said. “I’m a central banker.”
I wanted to coldcock the guy. Years ago, a central banker killed my partner. Instead, I shook my head.
“Let this be a message to all your central-banker friends out on the street,” I said. “No matter how many bitcoins you steal, you’ll never take away the dream of an open society based on the principles of personal and economic freedom.”
He nodded, because he knew I was right. Then he swiped his credit card to pay me for arresting him.

[Meikle641]

And the counter: http://www.theatlantic.com/politics/arc ... nt/360224/

I was just finishing up my shift by having sex with a prostitute when I got a call about an opportunity for overtime. A no-knock raid was going down across town.

"You're trying to have your salary spike this year to game the pension system, right?" my buddy told me. "Well, we're raiding a house where an informant says there's marijuana, and it's going to be awesome—we've got a $283,ooo military-grade armored SWAT truck and the kind of flash grenades that literally scared that one guy to death."

"Don't start without me," I told him. "I just have to stop by this pawn shop. It's run by some friends of mine from ATF. They paid this mentally disabled teenager $150 dollars to get a neck tattoo of a giant squid smoking a joint. Those guys are hilarious."

But when I got to the shop the guys weren't in any mood to joke around—something about having lost their guns again. That meant I had extra time to get to the raid. En route, I headed through a black and Latino neighborhood, and who did I see on the street? A teenage male who made what I would describe as a furtive movement.

So I threw him against a wall and frisked him. Then I realized I'd frisked the same kid a half-dozen times before. Never found anything. About 17 years old. Looked like he was mixed race. "What am I being arrested for?" he asked me. "For being a fucking mutt," I told him. "I am going to break your fuckin' arm off right now. Then I'm going to punch you in the face." I know stop-and-frisk is controversial, but it's like Ray Kelly said: "I go to communities of color. People want more." It meant a lot to us police officers when President Obama praised him.

By the time I arrived at the site of the raid it was after dark. Inside, there were the suspects, their kids, and the family dogs. We don't like to wait for suspects of nonviolent drug crimes to leave the house, or call on the phone and ask them to come out, or knock, because what if they flush the drugs we suspect them of having down the toilet? How would we ever win the War on Drugs if we let that happen?

So we go in with overwhelming force and firepower. Kick down the door and all that. Zealousness pays off, too. Just try to find me a free country where they arrest more people.

What happened at the raid?

No drugs found, but we did seize all the couple's cash anyway. Let them try to prove it's legit.

If memory serves, we shot some dogs to death on that raid too. I think it was two puppies, actually: One was 10 months old, and the other was three months old. Or wait. Was that the one where we killed a 9-year-old Labrador with its tail wagging? Shoot, actually, maybe it was the time that we tased and shot the Chihuahua? Man, these all blend together after a while. I know it wasn't the Akita we shot nine times. Or that Iraq War vet's rescue dog we killed. I don't think it was the the Jack Russell terrier or the golden retriever or that dog where the bullet also hit the 5-year-old. The point is that it was just a dog. It isn't like we arbitrarily pepper-sprayed a woman in the face, or shot an 80-year-old man as he lay in his own bed, or killed a mentally ill homeless guy by beating him to death.

Not that there's necessarily anything wrong with that!

Anyway, I won't be going on raids like that anymore. Nope, I'm 50 years old now. So I'll retire, and every month for the rest of my life I'll earn 90 percent of my peak salary—the one I inflated in my last year by working overtime. God bless Gray Davis.

Hey, what's the harm?

Not that my career in law enforcement is over. I'll be double-dipping. The FBI is my first choice. They take care of their own: Every time they've shot anyone since 1993 it's been deemed justified! The DEA could be fun too. I've always hated defense attorneys, so I'd take pleasure in tricking them into thinking we caught their clients one way, when really the information came from a secret, mass-surveillance program. Suckers. Of course, I could also go into the private sector. There's a lot of money to be made tracking the movements of millions of people, and then selling the information back to my former colleagues or to the highest bidder. Not that the license-plate-scanning business is a sure thing, what with surveillance drones on the horizon. I'd operate one. Especially once they start arming them! Anything but working as a guard or staff member in a juvenile prison.

Even I have my limits.

------------

I laughed pretty hard at both.

[Kaelik]

I did not find either of those to be funny at all.

[Username17]

The E3 trailer for The Division kind of blew me away. I won't play the game, but whoever made that trailer either needs to get all the moneys or kicked soundly in the reproductive organs.

I want to play that game. Not the actual game they're making, which will most definitely fail to live up to the promise of the trailer, because that is how E3 trailers do. But the game they're advertising? I want that.

I'm pretty sure it's going to be exactly what they are promising: Tom Clancy fapping to the Oath Keepers.

The big mystery of course, is whether the virus was distributed by the Red Chinese or quisling liberal atheist environmentalists. Naturally, Tom Clancy could really surprise us by having the big reveal be that the virus was made by Chinese communist environmentalists.

I mean, basically it's Tom Clancy Presents: Incoherent Conservative Talking Points: The Game. I don't know what you'd expect other than what's going to be delivered. The video already showed that the only way to stop a brown man with a gun is a white man with a gun. I can't imagine that the philosophy ever gets any deeper than that.

-Username17

[Kaelik]

And the bad guys are the US government too, just in case you were thinking there might be any reasonable levels at all. So it isn't even the destruction of the government that makes the world turn to shit, it is actually the government taking advantage of the evil Red Commie Atheist Environmentalist Virus.