Threads that make us Laugh, Cry, or Both

[Cielingcat]

Must be because I put Argaud on my ignore list and had to modify the URL to try to link to his post.

[MrWaeseL]

Aaargh! THERE IS NO NEED TO TANK IN D&D. Because it's not a fucking computer game, where you can trick the AI. If the monsters want to attack the wizard, they will attack the wizard regardless of the stupid tricks the tank is trying. Jesus christ people are retarded.

[Crissa]

If you want tank mechanics, you have to build it into the game. Grapple, Intervene, attacks of opportunity, tactics tactics tactics.

But otherwise, there's no reason they can't just run past you.

-Crissa

[PhoneLobster]

THERE IS NO NEED TO TANK IN D&D. Because it's not a fvcking computer game, where you can trick the AI.

But now there is the Knight class... er, which totally and utterly fails to fulfill that (or any) role but idiots everywhere BELIEVE it does...

So um, you must hate role play or something!

[CalibronXXX]

1175859612[/unixtime]]Aaargh! THERE IS NO NEED TO TANK IN D&D. Because it's not a fvcking computer game, where you can trick the AI. If the monsters want to attack the wizard, they will attack the wizard regardless of the stupid tricks the tank is trying. Jesus christ people are retarded.

You can sort of tank in D&D, but it's more of grabbing a ridiculous range of threatened squares, a bunch of AoOs, and using improved trip and stand still to stop enemies from being able to move inside your threatened square radius. So..yeah, basically there's no need for a tank in D&D.

[Cielingcat]

Oh, there is, but we generally call the tank a "Wizard" and he uses "Wall of Force" to stop enemies.

[Crissa]

Letsee... a friend of mine posted a couple videos:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fbGkxcY7YFU
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=i02YO2mKfw4
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UAI3fVieUXQ
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0qeN9IqmZpM

Yes, they're vaguely related if you watch them in order. No, they're worksafe... But that doesn't mean you won't be embarassed to be watching them.

-Crissa

No, I didn't make it through all of them, either...

[Cielingcat]

I've just learned that D&D isn't a game because the DM controls the challenges. Srsly.

[Crissa]

With that logic, the olympic games aren't games because the olympic committee controls the challenges...

-Crissa

[Cielingcat]

I just learned something else. D&D is dead and buried because WotC is catering to players instead of DMs. Also, all players are evil munchkin video-game players who ruined D&D.

[PhoneLobster]

1176089925[/unixtime]]I just learned something else. D&D is dead and buried because WotC is catering to players instead of DMs. Also, all players are evil munchkin video-game players who ruined D&D.

OK now that I would almost want to see.

Because it would fit the 3rd edition era community narrative remarkably well, going something along the lines of.

1) Lookout, evil munchkin video game players, they're out there and they are going to eat our babies! You had better not let them contribute anything to 3rd edition!

2) Now you had better do X stupid thing in in order to stop them (where X is nerf fighters, sabotage savage species, etc...)!

3) You had better not even consider undoing X and anyone who disagrees with it is an evil munchkin video gaming baby eater out to destroy the game, and then the world!

4) You bastards, the game is TOTALLY SCREWED, and despite you doing every stupid thing we ever told you to to stop those evil video game playing munchkins who definitely exist in large numbers and hate both D&D, us, and freedom, its somehow definitely THEIR FAULT.

From the basket weaver perspective its the perfect narrative of the dread scourge of totally non imaginary savage relentless munchkin saboteurs and their inevitable destruction of civilization.

[Count Arioch the 28th]

I've said it before, and I'll say it again.

Gamers in general are insufferable twits.

I'm so glad I don't have any "gamers" in my D&D group.

[Cielingcat]

1176099034[/unixtime]]

1176089925[/unixtime]]I just learned something else. D&D is dead and buried because WotC is catering to players instead of DMs. Also, all players are evil munchkin video-game players who ruined D&D.

OK now that I would almost want to see.

I can't give you that, but I can give you the link.

Warning: contains the dumbest shit I've ever fucking seen.

[MrWaeseL]

I'm not reading all that shit, did anyone post Frank's rant about how min/maxing is not only beneficial for a party but expected of ever member yet?

[Cielingcat]

He's ranting against people who are new to the game/like 3.x/play video games, not so much people who min/max.

[Cielingcat]

Apparently, the problem with 3.x is that the rules actually work.

I'm going to let that stand by itself.

[PhoneLobster]

Rules actually working, or trying to, came as a bit of an appalling shock to some players.

Many never really recovered.

[NineInchNall]

People are stupid. Of course, we all know this, and we also know that it's why Fighters don't get nice things. It's why there are people who think that Tome of Battle is overpowered but don't bat an eye when a Druid casts wall of smoke, boreal wind, call avalanche, frostfell, or tsunami while in the form of some giant animal that fucking bites off people's heads. It's why the WotC boards give me a headache.

Speaking of which, the sheer number and comedic value of the posts that people make on those boards is astounding. It's worth preserving for posterity.

Since I had so much fun reading through that "Funniest thread EVAR" thread, I'd kind of like to accumulate a list of links to threads of people saying stupid things like, "Spring Attack is broken," or, "Melee Weapon Mastery is broken," or, "warriors are just as powerful as spellcasters."

What say you?

[Cielingcat]

OMG VIDEO-GAMES D&d IS DEAD LOL

[User3]

This is comedy GOLD.

[Artless]

What, the entire featured articles page? Can't say I disagree with you.

[Leress]

Hey some of those retired articles are nice. On the subject of Spring attack is broken, MWM is broken, and Warriors are just as good as spell casters. It really saddens me that even after people show them that they are wrong the poster still come up with crap like "those are just theories" or "well if you do this..." which usually is a situation that will have the whole party dead any way. I can't read past page 3 on most of them.

I would like to submit this one
It's about making Link from Twilight Princess
http://boards1.wizards.com/showthread.php?t=826762

and this one about final fantasy 3.5
http://boards1.wizards.com/showthread.p ... br][br]and this one on final fantasy characters
http://boards1.wizards.com/showthread.p ... br][br]You know just nearly 99% of anything that has people doing anything with combining DnD and Final Fantasy on those boards

[Cielingcat]

Why do people cream their pants every time Sephiroth is mentioned? He was just some annoying little bitch with mommy issues, and the game wasn't even that good. Advent Children sucked and was just a sequence of flashy visual effects.

[User3]

1176342921[/unixtime]]Why do people cream their pants every time Sephiroth is mentioned? He was just some annoying little bitch with mommy issues, and the game wasn't even that good. Advent Children sucked and was just a sequence of flashy visual effects.

Because the audience for it was already conditioned by the last half dozen or so final fantasy games to think that flashy sequences of visual effects framed by loosly constructed nonsensical plot points is what a story should be like.

[fbmf]

[TGFBS]
Merged with the other thread. Let's keep all links to "threads that make us laugh or cry" links in one place, please.
[/TGFBS]