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Thaluikhain
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Post by Thaluikhain »

Does it have to be a modern gun? Captain Kirk made a gun in half an episode while being chased by a Gorn.
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Post by hyzmarca »

Thaluikhain wrote:Does it have to be a modern gun? Captain Kirk made a gun in half an episode while being chased by a Gorn.
You might be able to get away with a flintlock if you suck the GM's penis hard enough.


However, the requirement that it work reliably kind of makes Kirk's bamboo cannon non-viable.
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Post by Judging__Eagle »

When WoTC's publishing schedule is so scant, that a Deodorant company can release 5e D&D Classes and it becomes noteworthy among social media gaming groups. The real irony is that the class is meant for an earlier edition, it's more of a 3e class than a 5e class.

Old Spice's "The Gentleman" (looks like a sort-of Bard imho): https://drive.google.com/file/d/1mqawll ... as6Ik/view

https://nerdist.com/dungeons-and-dragon ... old-spice/

https://twitter.com/OldSpice/status/961 ... d-spice%2F
Last edited by Judging__Eagle on Sat Feb 10, 2018 6:48 am, edited 2 times in total.
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Post by Dogbert »

Judging__Eagle wrote:The real irony is that the class is meant for an earlier edition, it's more of a 3e class than a 5e class.
Shouldn't it be now a Barbarian?
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Post by Prak »

Yeah, that class... I wonder if someone made it back when 3rd was actually in print, and had it hanging around? That would explain a lot, actually.
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Post by nockermensch »

Judging__Eagle wrote:When WoTC's publishing schedule is so scant, that a Deodorant company can release 5e D&D Classes and it becomes noteworthy among social media gaming groups. The real irony is that the class is meant for an earlier edition, it's more of a 3e class than a 5e class.

Old Spice's "The Gentleman" (looks like a sort-of Bard imho): https://drive.google.com/file/d/1mqawll ... as6Ik/view

https://nerdist.com/dungeons-and-dragon ... old-spice/

https://twitter.com/OldSpice/status/961 ... d-spice%2F
That's totally 3.5 (or, argueably, Pathfinder).

If you wanted any even more proof that WotC completely shat their bed after 3.5e, you need to look no further than this. It's fucking 2018 and when Old Spice's agency decided to go with a "D&D class" ad campaign (and in the process doing their research to avoid community backlash) they went and picked the edition that ended 10 years ago.
Last edited by nockermensch on Sat Feb 10, 2018 2:55 pm, edited 1 time in total.
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Post by maglag »

I see Climb as class skill so 3.5.

And although I agree it shows that 5e is doing rather poorly, I would bet a big company making their own homebrew would be noteworthy news even when 3rd edition was still being officially supported. This is can you imagine old spice releasing their own Skyrim mod?
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Post by Mord »

maglag wrote:can you imagine old spice releasing their own Skyrim mod?
I'd play that.
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Post by TiaC »

It's a Pathfinder class, I think? Linguistics as a class skill.
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Post by hyzmarca »

It seems like it would be a pain in the butt to get the licensed officiant proposal modifier, since it requires the player to physically bring one to the game.

I mean, sure, some people can get a priest to come down to their D&D game for a +15 modifier, but it seems like a lot of work.

Also, the lack of clear organizational management rules makes the MBA a real mother-may-I skill.
Last edited by hyzmarca on Sat Feb 10, 2018 10:19 pm, edited 1 time in total.
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Post by Chamomile »

Can the Old Spice marketing team tell the difference between 3.X and 5e? I'm pretty sure which edition this class ended up in is a matter of which edition the local D&D guy happened to play.
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Post by Prak »

My personal theory is that someone on the marketing team is a D&D guy and already had this made, and decided to pitch it to the team, possibly because D&D is getting a tad more accepted in the mainstream because of Stranger Things/Gravity Falls/etc. Maybe because they play 3.W/e, maybe because they used to play 3.W/e but don't play anything currently, or whatever.
Cuz apparently I gotta break this down for you dense motherfuckers- I'm trans feminine nonbinary. My pronouns are they/them.
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You should gain sanity for finding out that the problems of a region are because there are fucking monsters there.
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Post by CapnTthePirateG »

I'm guessing referencing both Climb and Perception is part of the joke.
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Post by radthemad4 »

It's probably for Pathfinder since it has Linguistics and Stealth. Pathfinder has Climb.
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Post by maglag »

You're right, plus it mentions skill ranks (PF) instead of skill points (D&D) without 3.X's x4 multiplier at first level.

Considering the "Download this new Old Spice Gentleman Class for the greatest role playing game of all time, which we cannot mention for legal reasons", I'm not sure if an honest mistake or part of the joke or if they're actually serious that they're using Pathfinder rules.
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Post by Nebuchadnezzar »

Having long ago accepted the maxim "Never give a cent to Kevin Siembieda", my schadenfreude over his ongoing failings is only nominally tempered by sympathy towards those he fleeced. Having finally admitted that the second half of kickstarter deliverables for Robotech RPG Tactics have been abandoned, Kevin announced Palladium will be losing the license from Harmony Gold effective 3/31. In a particularly shitheel move PB is trying to convince backers to accept Wave 1 product valued at retail price in lieu of a refund for Wave 2 commitments reassessed at a fraction from before, and asks the suckers to pay twice for shipping to boot.

The Facebook group formed to discuss suing Palladium is at a little over 300 people of the 5300 who lost money. Even with all the talk of complaints registered with the MI Attorney General and the like, I don't necessarily see them moving forward. I would, however, be interested on the over/under for Siembieda doing something so boneheaded as to demand a response. My current bet is he'll claim he destroyed unsold backstock as a tax write off, then try to nickle and dime it on a secondary market, or give it away at PB's upcoming Open House.
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Post by nockermensch »

You know, between like 1/4 of the threads here being "Here is why [this game|company|developer] is [bad|dumb|actually criminal]" and the backstabbing shit I personally know from the Brazilian RPG industry, I'm each day more prepared to accept that those 80s Satanic Panic preachers were onto something and RPGs are actually of the Devil.

PS: I remain firmly atheist, but it seems to be simply too many horrible people in this business.
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Post by Mord »

nockermensch wrote:You know, between like 1/4 of the threads here being "Here is why [this game|company|developer] is [bad|dumb|actually criminal]" and the backstabbing shit I personally know from the Brazilian RPG industry, I'm each day more prepared to accept that those 80s Satanic Panic preachers were onto something and RPGs are actually of the Devil.

PS: I remain firmly atheist, but it seems to be simply too many horrible people in this business.
The entire annual revenue of the RPG industry isn't enough for a real businessperson to wipe their ass with, so the only people willing to play the game are frauds, kooks, and morons.
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Post by virgil »

Mord wrote:
nockermensch wrote:You know, between like 1/4 of the threads here being "Here is why [this game|company|developer] is [bad|dumb|actually criminal]" and the backstabbing shit I personally know from the Brazilian RPG industry, I'm each day more prepared to accept that those 80s Satanic Panic preachers were onto something and RPGs are actually of the Devil.

PS: I remain firmly atheist, but it seems to be simply too many horrible people in this business.
The entire annual revenue of the RPG industry isn't enough for a real businessperson to wipe their ass with, so the only people willing to play the game are frauds, kooks, and morons.
Financial shenanigans don't diminish when the stakes are raised, as evidenced by [insert virtually any example]. I think it's more the fact that RPGs are soo small that they're functionally unregulated, and it's lack of regulation that lets them 'flourish'
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Post by Cervantes »

it's not really "bigger industries are less scam-ridden" and more "the scammers in those industries are far more refined than those who take aim at the RPG market"
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Post by Occluded Sun »

nockermensch wrote:You know, between like 1/4 of the threads here being "Here is why [this game|company|developer] is [bad|dumb|actually criminal]" and the backstabbing shit I personally know from the Brazilian RPG industry, I'm each day more prepared to accept that those 80s Satanic Panic preachers were onto something and RPGs are actually of the Devil.
How is it any different from any other hobby? (You would not *believe* the friction in the local crocheting club - it's bad enough that you can hear it outside the library's soundproofed meeting room.)
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Post by Username17 »

Hobby Lobby's Robby Hobby: Hamurabi

Remember when Hobby Lobby was found to be paying smugglers and mercenaries to steal cultural and historical artifacts from the Middle East? Or when they entered into a transparently fraudulent supreme court filing to help the Republican party weaken the health insurance guarantees of young women?

That's a company whose entire purpose is to provide glitter and masking tape for people with craft hobbies. And they are the actual villains from Snow Crash.


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Post by Koumei »

hyzmarca wrote:I mean, sure, some people can get a priest to come down to their D&D game for a +15 modifier, but it seems like a lot of work.
Back in the day, one of my regular groups had a priest and a shaman. Not in-game, those were their actual jobs. The only games the priest would not play were:
A) Demon: the Fallen ("because it's too much like my job" was the joke answer, I suspect "because it's garbage" would be the real answer)
and B) The really rules-heavy games of the old day
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Post by Prak »

Technically, it doesn't have to be a priest. Anyone licensed to perform a marriage would work. So judge, any ordained minister, sea captain (may only work if your game is on a boat)...
Cuz apparently I gotta break this down for you dense motherfuckers- I'm trans feminine nonbinary. My pronouns are they/them.
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FrankTrollman wrote:In Soviet Russia, cosmic horror is the default state.

You should gain sanity for finding out that the problems of a region are because there are fucking monsters there.
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Post by Koumei »

Sea captains do not innately have that power. You could be a sea captain and gain that power by also getting the license, but it's not just part of the deal. They don't just automatically gain full legal powers over international waters or whatever - you might be thinking of either the Submariner, Aquaman, or Harold Holt.

But depending on where you live, it can be pretty easy to get that power and you could just be an Elvis impersonator or "some dude who decided he wanted the power to wed people".
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