Stuff For the Tabletop Game for New Players

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Koumei
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Stuff For the Tabletop Game for New Players

Post by Koumei »

For the record, this is going to start as a blatant rip-off of Storm of Zehir, which they have not played, and then I'll just roll with whatever they decide to do, so it might take a radically different direction. I kind of like the idea of getting a base that they can slowly upgrade and develop, along with securing trades, exploring so as to find new resource nodes and all that.

Okay, so three players were at the game night (and Descent is loads of fun, but not related to the PC game), and did the test I made (a fairly minor edit of Frank's one, changing some of the class options and making it relevant to the actual campain), and decided what they want to play.

1. Wizard (Necromancer). The results said Wizard, with him specifically choosing the "I create undead" choice, basically I think making a whole Essence-based Necromancer class would be a major undertaking. He said he trusts me to pick a good race, so after the "Hahaha sucker" joke, I figured I'd make him an elf. Because back-up longbow, "constantly searching" and the fact that elves can seriously teach everyone else how to trance (as of PHBII).

2. Wizard, and wants to do "earthy" stuff, so I figure he'll be a Transmutionist with Abjuration as another big part. He wishes to be an Earth Genasi, so I've basically altered the dwarf a bit.

3. Rogue, and chose Fire Genasi, so again, I've just sort of mashed something together.

I'll probably make a couple of spares for if the fourth guy shows up - a Barbarian, Ranger and Warlock or something like that.

---

Skills:
I'm trimming skills down a huge amount, and forever remembering how shitty it is that we have an ability score of "resisting stuff" that doesn't do anything, and that basically all "being strong" things are combat rolls that are not appropriate as skills.
Dexterity:
-Athletics (Balance, Climb, Jump, Tumble)
-Disable Device (including Open Lock)
-Escape Artist
-Ride
-Stealth (Hide and Move Silently)

Intelligence:
-Alchemy (Craft Alchemy, and beating the DC by X lets you increase the Save DC or the damage dice or whatever)
-Appraise
-Craft (one skill to cover all the non-Alchemy)
-Decipher Script
-Lore (Knowledge, and it works like 3.0 Perform, with each rank giving a new category)
-Search

Wisdom:
-Handle Animal
-Heal (for anything other than "stop someone bleeding out, it needs a healer's kit, and works like in the NWN games to restore HP and crap)
-Perception (Spot and Listen)
-Sense Motive
-Survival

Charisma:
-Bluff
-Diplomacy
-Gather Information
-Intimidate
-Perform (3.0 version)
-Use Magic Device
---

Feats:

I like the idea of the simplified "one decent thing every level" way. So the list I came up with (involving some "stealing from Frank") is as follows:
Aberrant Blood: gives like five of the Aberrant Feats from Calamari Cookbook
Apprentice/Mentor
Aura of Courage: as the Paladin class feature
Aura of Fear: 30' radius, Will vs Shaken, Charisma-based
Beckon the Frozen
Broker of the Infernal
Combat Tactician: Short Haft + Stand Still + Cometary Collision + Defensive Sweep
Corpse Crafter: Crafter + Deadly Chill + Retribution + Hardened + Nimble
Craft Golem
Craft Wondrous Item
Draconic Legacy: Heritage + Skin + Resistance + Pact + Lineage
Elemental Immunity
Elemental Spell Mixture: Substitution (+0), Admixture (+4), 3 Thunders (+0), Uttercold (+0)
Evasion
Extend Spell: Extend (+1), Persistent (+6)
Fey Heritage: Heritage + Skin + Presence + Legacy + Nymph's Kiss
Fly-By Attack
Ghost Hunter: any weapon has 50% chance to hit, hear incorporeal normally, armour is Ghost Touch
Horde Breaker: Combat Reflexes + Great Cleave
Infernal Heritage: Tanar'ri or Baatezu Subtype, Resistance = HD rather than Immunity
Landlord
Mage Slayer: no defensive casting, all damage is ongoing, ignore Deflect
Magical Beast Companion (for Animal Companions or Familiars)
Magical Beast Form (for Berserkers with Bear Form, and for Wild Shapers)
Master of Manoeuvres: Improved Grapple/Grab/Trip/Disarm/Bullrush + Defensive Throw
Mounted Archery: Mounted Combat + Mounted Archery + Improved MA + Rapid Shot
Mounted Combat: Mounted Combat + Ride-By-Attack + Trample + Spirited Charge
Natural Spell
Perfect Aim: Precise Shot + Point Blank Shot + Far Shot + Rapid Reload
Perfect Two Weapon Fighting
Polyglot
Powerful Spell: Empower (+2), Maximise (+4), Explosive (+1), Intensify (+7)
Quicken Spell (+4)
Shaped Spell: Sculpt (+0), Widen (+1), Split Ray (+2), Reach (+1), Chain (+3)
Soul Eater: Devour the Soul + Craft of the Soulstealer + Essence Gourmand
Subtle Spell: Still (+0), Silent (+0), Delay (+0)
Tomb-Tainted Soul
Toxin Immunity
Universal Proficiency (all Armour, Weapons, Shields)
Weapon Finesse: can use Dex rather than Str for attacks, can use Int rather than Str for damage, does not have to use both
Whirlwind Attack
Wild Empathy
Wings
Zen Archery
Meta-Magic does "that rule basically everyone uses", where it doesn't actually use the higher level, you just have to have that higher level available. Merry Christmas.

---

New Races:
EARTH GENASI
Hailing from the Elemental Plane of Earth, you are partly made of dirt and stone. Your skin is hard and cool to the touch, possibly smooth like obsidian, possibly rough like gravel. Your hair more closely resembles a vein of ore that has been chiselled into shape, and should you be cut, grey blood will ooze out slowly. Broad shouldered and sturdy, you are a hard case, but you pay for your resiliency by moving more slowly than others. Even though your parents were humanoid – often dwarfs or halflings – you still carry a strong form of elemental lineage, and this leads to a certain amount of discrimination against you.

Type: Humanoid [Earth, Extra-Planar]
Size: Medium
Movement Speed: 20' (Burrow 20')
Languages: Common and either Dwarven, Undercommon or Terran
Vision: Regular, Low-Light Vision, Darkvision out to 60'
Ability Scores: +2 Constitution, -2 Dexterity. You are tough and hard to poison, but slow-moving.
Hard Rock: you have an innate Natural Armour bonus of +1 to your Armour Class, as well as Damage Reduction 5/Adamantium.
Stone Telling: the earth itself can sort of speak to you, or perhaps you're just good at reading it and noticing things about it. You gain a +4 Bonus on Appraise checks made in regards to gems, metals and ore, and on Survival and Perception checks made while underground.

Earth Genasi weigh one and a half times as much as humans of equal size.

FIRE GENASI
Hailing from the Elemental Plane of Fire, you are partly made of cinders and ash. Your skin is naturally a deep red, but constantly develops a dark grey coating, and is warm to the touch. Your hair more closely resembles a mass of smoke or fire, and should you be cut, it would seem like magma is seeping from your skin, along with a spray of sparks. Fire Genasi are known for being impulsive and not thinking things through, but are also known for commanding awe from those around them, caring a great deal and convincing others to do the same. Even though your parents were humanoid – often elves or humans – you still carry a strong form of elemental lineage, and this leads to a certain amount of discrimination against you until you win people over with your charm.

Type: Humanoid [Extra-Planar, Fire]
Size: Medium
Movement Speed: 30'
Languages: Common, Ignan
Vision: Regular, Low-Light Vision, Darkvision out to 60'
Ability Scores: +2 Charisma, -2 Wisdom. You are passionate about things, but seldom use common sense, just going with what seems like the best idea at the time.
Fire Subtype: you burn with a fierce heat that is most at-home near similar heat. You are completely immune to Fire damage and all other [Fire] effects, as well as to heat-based fatigue, however Cold deals +50% damage to you.
Smoke Affinity: you can see through and breathe smoke as though it were fresh air, you're that at home in it. Furthermore, if you would ever have Concealment in smoke, you instead have Full Concealment – your body just blends in completely.
---

Classes can have their own posts I guess.
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Koumei
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Post by Koumei »

THE ROGUE
“Yeah, the dragon's dead, but that was just a side-track. Now for the important part: looting.”

Adept at stealth, scouting, and the finding and creation of traps, rogues are really good as the first adventurer into a room – and the first one out. The contents of a rogue's knapsack may seem to just be ball bearings, rags, a bottle of cider and some string, but in their hands, that is a deadly arsenal. Rogues have an array of combat techniques that they can use without limit, but that require certain battlefield conditions, causing them to dance about the battlefield to get into position.
So basically, Sneak Attack is one of the options you can pick straight from level one, and you probably should. There's a lot of stuff for flanking, catching people flat, and Opps of Attackatunity. A lot of the Special Abilities (including assorted ones from other books) are just baked into the class, too. There's nothing actually stopping you from playing this 100% as a Flasked Avenger and treating this as a power up, but you no longer have to do that or Abuse Magic Devices to turn into a Cleric or whatever.

Because Traps are prepared into slots and have to compete with one another, they typically scale to some extent.
Hit Points Per Level: 3 + Constitution Modifier (x4 at level 1)
BAB: Medium
Saves: Good Ref
Skill Points Per Level: 8 + Intelligence Modifier (x4 at level 1)
Class Skills: Alchemy, Appraise, Athletics, Bluff, Craft, Decipher Script, Diplomacy, Disable Device, Escape Artist, Gather Information, Intimidate, Lore, Perception, Perform, Search, Sense Motive, Sleight of Hand, Stealth, Use Magic Device

Weapon Proficiencies: Simple Weapons, Hand Crossbow, Rapier, Sap, Short Bow, Short Sword.
Armour Proficiencies: Light Armour and Cloth Armour
LevelSpecialTechniquesCapacity
1Hide in Plain Sight44
2Evasion55
3Uncanny Dodge65
4Skill Mastery76
5Stylish Techniques96
6Opportunist107
7Improved Uncanny Dodge117
8Skill Mastery128
9Amazing Techniques148
10Improved Evasion159
11Crippling Strike169
12Skill Mastery1710
13Impossible Techniques1910
14Greater Uncanny Dodge2011
15Friend's Evasion2111
16Skill Mastery2212
17Perfect Techniques2412
18Exploit Weakness2513
19Perfect Evasion2613
20Skill Perfection2714

Hide in Plain Sight (Ex): the Rogue can attempt Stealth even when being directly observed, with no penalty for doing so. He does not need cover or concealment.

Trapfinding (Ex): the Rogue is able to find traps with the Search skill, even if they are magical and have a Search DC higher than 20.

Techniques: the Rogue gains a number of abilities over his career called Techniques. These fall under two categories: Tricks, which can be used at will, without preparation, but require certain conditions to be met, and Traps, which have to be prepared beforehand, requiring one minute of preparation per Trap. The Rogue has a limit to how many Traps can be prepared at a given time, and that equals his Capacity. It is best for a Rogue to have a few of each. Each Technique lists whether it is an Extraordinary or Supernatural ability, with Tricks also listing their required conditions, and Traps listing any required ingredients - note that often it does not require the conditions you might expect if someone were to make the trap normally. If a Technique requires a Saving Throw, the Save DC is 10 + half your level + your Dexterity Bonus.

Evasion (Ex): starting at second level, whenever the Rogue succeeds at a Reflex Save for half damage, he instead takes zero damage.

Uncanny Dodge (Ex): at level three, the Rogue is so alert that he is never denied his Dexterity Bonus to Armour Class, even when flat-footed. At level seven, he becomes even more alert and cannot be flanked. At level fourteen, he is always considered to be actively searching his surrounding environment, without needing to constantly stop and declare he is searching stuff.

Skill Mastery (Ex): every fourth level except twentieth, the Rogue may select any two skills in which he has at least one rank. For those two skills, he may take 10 on the roll even if he is distracted or under pressure.

Stylish Techniques: at level five, the Rogue gains access to Stylish Techniques.

Opportunist (Ex): beginning at level six, the Rogue is good at putting the boot in. Once per turn, when someone else successfully hits an enemy in a square the Rogue threatens, he may make an Attack of Opportunity against that foe “just because”.

Amazing Techniques: at level nine, the Rogue gains access to Amazing Techniques.

Improved Evasion (Ex): at level ten, whenever the Rogue fails a Reflex Save for half damage, he only suffers half damage, and he takes zero damage on a successful saving throw.

Crippling Strike (Ex): starting at level eleven, any time the Rogue successfully hits a foe who he flanks or who is denied their Dexterity Bonus to Armour Class, or lands a Critical Hit against a foe, he also deals 2 points of Strength Damage to them.

Impossible Techniques: at level thirteen, the Rogue gains access to Impossible Techniques.

Friend's Evasion (Ex): starting at level fifteen, the Rogue can help warn his friends. Any adjacent ally has Evasion.

Perfect Techniques: at level seventeen, the Rogue gains access to Perfect Techniques.

Exploit Weakness (Ex): starting at level eighteen, the Rogue may use a Full Round Action to carefully target a foe. First he makes a Perception check, with a DC equal to the Armour Class of the opponent. If that succeeds, he then makes one attack against the opponent, resolved as a Touch Attack. If the attack hits, it deals damage as normal, but for the next five rounds, everyone is able to take advantage of the weakness created and all attacks against the target are Touch Attacks. Furthermore, for the duration, the target suffers ongoing damage on each of its turns, equal to the Dexterity Bonus of the Rogue.

Perfect Evasion (Ex): the nineteenth-level Rogue is so good at avoiding danger that he automatically passes all Reflex Saves and is simply immune to effects that require or allow one.

Skill Perfection (Ex): at level twenty, the Rogue is the best at all skills with which he has Skill Mastery. Any time he makes a check with those skills, he is treated as rolling a 20 on the die.

Basic Techniques:
Blazing Impact [Trap] (Ex)
Ingredients: acid flask or alchemist fire, worn armour, cloth
Hidden behind the clothing, the flask is pressed against your armour. An attacker is in for a shock.
Effect: if an enemy successfully hits you, the flask bursts open, dealing splash damage to you. If the attacking enemy is adjacent to you, they suffer the full damage of the alchemical item, with no saving throw against other effects. At levels 5, 9, 13 and 17, add one extra die of damage.

Burning Blade [Trap] (Ex)
Ingredients: acid flask or alchemist fire, melee weapon
You quickly smash the flask against your weapon, and now you have a weapon that is on fire or dripping with acid! That's hardly a trap...
Effect: with a Swift Action, you can apply the alchemical substance to your weapon. For a number of rounds equal to your Intelligence Bonus, your weapon now deals +1d6 damage of the same type as the substance, for any foe who fell into the “trap” of “getting smacked in the face”. At levels 5, 9, 13 and 17, add one extra die of damage.

Cluster Spikes [Trap] (Ex)
Ingredients: bag of caltrops, thunderstone
The thunderstone goes inside the bag, and the bag goes on the ground. Woe befall he who steps on the nailbomb landmine.
Effect: you can place this on the ground with a Standard Action. You can cover it up with a Full Round Action and a Sleight of Hand check, opposed by the Perception check of anyone who wishes to notice. If someone enters the square containing it, they must pass a Reflex Save to avoid stepping on it – assuming they see it at all. Failure results in the bag detonating, with them suffering 3d6 Piercing damage (no save), and everyone adjacent also suffering the damage (Reflex Half). At levels 5, 9, 13 and 17, add an extra 3d6 points of damage.

Cunning Feint [Trick] (Ex)
Conditions: an adjacent enemy misses you with an attack
The enemy stumbles ahead, leaving its back exposed to you. That's always a bad thing.
Effect: you can activate this with an Immediate Action. You swap places with the enemy, and until his next turn, he is denied his Dexterity Bonus to Armour Class against your attacks.

Disruption [Trick] (Ex)
Conditions: the enemy is adjacent to at least two other creatures that it considers allies.
A simple shove, and suddenly the enemies are tripping over each other and arguing.
Effect: with a Standard Action, you make an attack against the enemy. If it hits, then it deals damage and you may make one Trip attempt – you decide whether Strength or Dexterity is used, and this attempt is made against the target and all adjacent allies of the target.

Flashbang Mine [Trap] (Ex)
Ingredients: luminescent fungus or bug parts, wax, thunderstone
Carefully rubbing the light source onto the stone, then covering it in wax, results in something that appears dull. If you step on it, however, there is a bright light and a loud bang.
Effect: placing the “mine” on the ground requires a Standard Action. Covering it up takes a Full Round Action and a Sleight of Hand check, opposed by the Perception of anyone who might want to notice. If someone enters its square, they must make a Reflex Save to avoid stepping on it – assuming they can see it in the first place. Failure results in it going off, and they are both Blind and Deaf for 1d4 rounds. Adjacent creatures are also affected if they fail a Fortitude Save. You may also use a Standard Action to throw this within 30', in which case it automatically goes off, affecting all creatures in a 5' radius on a failed Fortitude Save. At levels 5, 9, 13 and 17, add another 1d4 rounds to the duration.

Flying Trip [Trick] (Ex)
Conditions: a foe declares a Charge against you.
Sometimes, taking a run-up is a bad idea. Because when you miss, you just keep going.
Effect: with an Immediate Action, you can take a 5' step. The target is unable to attack you, and must attempt a Reflex Save. If they succeed, they stop in front of where you previously were. If they fail, they instead continue their movement for 10 feet and fall Prone.

Hidden Dagger [Trap] (Ex)
Ingredients: none
As it turns out, you had another knife!
Effect: you actually have an extra dagger hidden about your person. If someone tries to find it with a basic pat-down, they fail. A proper search still won't work unless they beat you in an opposed Sleight of Hand check, taking a full minute. You can draw the blade with a Swift Action, and on the turn in which you do so, your opponent is denied their Dexterity Bonus to Armour Class against it. Note that you don't need to actually have the dagger in your equipment: it just turns out you had it there all along! At level five, you treat it as a +2 Dagger. At level nine, you treat it as a +3 Keen dagger. At level thirteen, you can hide three daggers on your body with just one Capacity slot. At level seventeen, you treat them as +5 Keen daggers.

Hogtie [Trick] (Ex)
Conditions: an adjacent foe is Entangled
When they already have rope or vines wrapped partly around them, it just makes sense to go whole hog, if you'll pardon the pun, and tie them up completely.
Effect: with a Full Round Action, you can attempt a Grapple check, using your choice of Strength or Dexterity against the target. If you succeed, the foe is bound and rendered Helpless until they manage to escape with an Escape Artist check (DC 10 + your Grapple result) or an ally cuts them free.

Makeshift Firebomb [Trap] (Su)
Ingredients: a bottle, a rag, and pretty much any liquid
Who would have thought that the sap from that tree was so flammable in a bottle?
Effect: by mixing the ingredients together, you have a flask of alchemist fire, except better. It deals 1d12 Fire damage, though the rest of the effects are the same. At level five, it deals 2d12 damage, with 1d6 splash damage out to 10 feet. At level nine, the burning deals 2d6 damage per round. At level thirteen, the whole area continues to burn for 5 rounds, dealing Fire damage to all in the area equal to 3d6 plus your Intelligence Bonus. At level nineteen, the base damage is 10d6, the splash damage is 5d6, the burning damage is 6d6 and the ongoing area damage is 3d6 plus your Intelligence Bonus.

Purgative Punch [Trick] (Ex)
Conditions: an adjacent target is suffering from a Poison
With a solid strike to just the right place, they'll be vomiting the toxins out for sure!
Effect: with a Standard Action, make an attack with a Bludgeoning weapon. If it hits, the target must pass a Fortitude Save, or collapse Prone and Nauseated for 1d6 rounds. At the end of this duration, they gain an extra Save against their poison, with a bonus equal to the damage you dealt. If they pass the save, they are no longer poisoned and will suffer no further effects.

Sneak Attack [Trick] (Ex)
Conditions: you flank your opponent, or your opponent is denied their Dexterity Bonus to AC
With their attention divided, your opponent provides the perfect opportunity to deliver a swift strike to the weak point.
Effect: with an Attack Action, you make an attack against the foe. If it hits, it deals an extra 1d6 points of damage per 2 levels (round up).

Sucker Punch [Trick] (Ex)
Conditions: an ally provokes an Attack of Opportunity from a foe adjacent to you
They take a moment to raise their fist towards your ally... and lower their guard against you.
Effect: you may make an Attack of Opportunity against the opponent, and for this attack, they are denied their Dexterity Bonus to Armour Class.

Sudden Snare [Trap] (Su)
Ingredients: string, rope or wire
Everyone thought the ground was clear. Nobody remembers you laying that trap, and yet here we are, with the opponent lying face-down in the mud.
Effect: with an Immediate Action, designate an opponent within 30 feet. They just triggered the trap that you apparently set earlier. The opponent must pass a Reflex Save or fall Prone and Dazed for one round. At levels five and thirteen, add 60 feet to the maximum range. At levels nine and seventeen, you may carry another snare per Capacity slot, and the duration is extended by 1 round.

Wall Flip [Trick] (Ex)
Conditions: a foe is adjacent to you, with a wall adjacent to you directly opposite that foe
The enemy chases you to the wall... but you kick off the wall in a great backflip, and land behind your foe, stabbing them in the back of the neck.
Effect: with a Standard Action, you may make an Athletics check in an attempt to move directly through the opponent's square and behind them. The DC is 5 per square you need to move (so 10 for a Medium opponent). If you pass, you move behind them and do not provoke an Attack of Opportunity for your movement. You may then make one attack against them, against which they are denied their Dexterity Bonus to Armour Class.
Stylish Techniques:
Acid Gas Bomb [Trap] (Su)
Ingredients: acid flask, chalk, wax
A bit of a shake, and then it's ready to explode in a fine, choking mist, likely killing all who take a breath.
Effect:

Cloak of Shadows [Trick] (Ex)
Conditions: an Illusion spell is cast with an area of effect that includes you, or you enter the area of effect of an Illusion spell
Grasping the intangible, you pull it to you, hiding you from sight.

Curb Stomp [Trick] (Ex)
Conditions: an enemy you threaten falls Prone
Even as the enemy falls, you are ready to take advantage of the situation with a boot to the back of their skull.

Displacing Dive [Trick] (Ex)
Conditions: you use Tumble to avoid an Attack of Opportunity, or Evasion to avoid damage
Hurling yourself out of the way, you move to a better position even as foes remain trained on where you used to be.

Diverting Defence [Trick] (Ex)
Conditions: you are Flanked by two opponents, one of whom attacks you
You duck at just the right moment, causing a mis-communication, and the enemies are soon striking one another.

Earthquake Bomb [Trap] (Ex)
Ingredients: blast globe or black powder and thunder stone
The foe takes one step... and then the ground erupts beneath them.

Sentry Turret [Trap] (Su)
Ingredients: repeater crossbow, tripod, string
Turrets are motionless and full of crossbow bolts. Wait, my mistake, that's the enemy after it sees them.

Spell Plantation [Trap] (Su)
Ingredients: magic wand
A simple stick lies in the ground, until bumped, at which point the primed magic is unleashed.

Sudden Sandstorm [Trap] (Su)
Ingredients: string, rope, chain or wire
With a flick of the wrist, you tug at the rope you had half-buried earlier, creating a maelstrom of sand in the air.

Trick Shot [Trick] (Ex)
Conditions: an opponent is out of Line of Sight, or benefits from Cover or Concealment
In an uncanny way, you fire at a wall, and hit your unsuspecting foe with the ricochet.
Amazing Techniques:
A Word in Your Ear [Trick] (Ex)
Conditions: an adjacent opponent is Confused
With a whisper, you shape the delusions of a puzzled foe, directing their actions.

Arcane Surge [Trick] (Su)
Conditions: somebody within Close Range activates a Magic Item
You react swiftly, and disrupt the use of the magic item, causing dangerous backlash.

Burial Chamber [Trap] (Su)
Ingredients: acid flask, water
All it takes is one step, and then solid ground is more like mud, and the enemy is buried

Cluster Bomb Mine [Trap] (Su)
Ingredients: blast globe, nail
Somehow, the nail drives into the globe perfectly, and the explosion sends individual chunks of explosive flying, each as dangerous as the original.

Feed the Flames [Trick] (Ex)
Conditions: an enemy within 30 feet is on fire
You're all too happy to add to the fire, sending the enemy into a gigantic blaze.

Instant Wall [Trap] (Su)
Ingredients: brick
By inscribing Conjuration and Transmutation runes on a simple brick, you prime it to form a magical wall with just a moment's notice.

Poisonous Presence [Trap] (Ex)
Ingredients: any one poison, garlic, belladonna, thin pouch
It takes a while for people to notice, but hanging around you is bad news. Of course, if they hit you they notice pretty quickly.

Redirected Projectile [Trick] (Ex)
Conditions: an enemy makes a ranged attack or casts a spell that is resolved with a Ranged Attack or Ranged Touch Attack
With a single shot or a thrown stone, you adjust the flight path of an enemy projectile.

Shadow Form [Trick] (Su)
Conditions: you are in sufficient darkness to gain Concealment
You don't just adopt the darkness, you are born into it, moulded by it.

Terminal Ground [Trap] (Su)
Ingredients: a handful of sand and ash or bone fragments
By drawing the Negative Energy Plane into the earth itself, you prime it to suck the life out of anything nearby.
Last edited by Koumei on Thu May 14, 2015 11:27 am, edited 3 times in total.
Count Arioch the 28th wrote:There is NOTHING better than lesbians. Lesbians make everything better.
Koumei
Serious Badass
Posts: 13871
Joined: Fri Mar 07, 2008 7:54 pm
Location: South Ausfailia

Post by Koumei »

THE WIZARD
“Remember this: knowledge is power, to be all knowing is to be all powerful.”

Being all about book learning, the wizard has a spellbook out of which he can prepare a small number of spells, then cast them to his heart's content. Given time, he can sit down and memorise different spells, but that isn't happening in the middle of a fight. Wizard spells are useful in a lot of circumstances, and run the gamut from illusions to creating undead to creating objects to blasting people with fire. Almost all wizards choose an area of magic for specialisation – they lose the ability to cast certain types of spells, but their specialist school is a whole lot better as a result.
It was hard to decide on an acceptable number of spell slots. I was toying with the idea of "The Wizard has nine spell slots." where at level one it's 9/-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-, at level three it's 5/4/-/-/-/-/-/-/-, and so on until at level seventeen it's 1/1/1/1/1/1/1/1/1. But that is completely out of whack at the early levels. I erred on the side of caution, but then let Intelligence add a certain amount - at early levels, it's giving you a better deal than before, but at later levels it isn't doing as much, but that's okay because you innately have more slots anyway.

The actual spell lists available won't just be "See: D&D 3Ed". They can't be that. Instead I'll take a bunch of spells of each School at each level that I think work pretty well, maybe make adjustments if necessary. Spells that can be cast every round (and also swapped out when they're not relevant) without that causing problems. With the implication that people can dig through splat books and find other spells that probably also work.
Hit Points Per Level: 2 + Constitution Modifier (x4 at level 1)
BAB: Poor
Saves: Good Will
Skill Points Per Level: 2 + Intelligence Modifier (x4 at level 1)
Class Skills: Alchemy, Craft, Decipher Script, Gather Information, Heal, Lore, Ride

Weapon Proficiencies: Club, Sling, Quarterstaff, Light Crossbow, Dagger
Armour Proficiencies: Cloth Armour
LevelSpecialSpell Slots
1Specialisation, Familiar1 First Level
2Arcane Crafting1 Specialist
3Second Level Spells1 Second Level
4Lesser Specialist Arts-
5Third Level Spells1 Third Level
6Vatic Gaze-
7Fourth Level Spells1 Fourth Level
8Accomplished Specialist Arts1 Specialist
9Fifth Level Spells1 Fifth Level
10Named Spell1 Named Spell
11Sixth Level Spells1 Sixth Level
12Improved Specialist Arts-
13Seventh Level Spells1 Seventh Level
14Familial Link1 Specialist
15Eighth Level Spells1 Eighth Level
16Greater Specialist Arts-
17Ninth Level Spells1 Ninth Level
18Named Spell1 Named Spell
19Contingency1 Contingency
20Transcendent Specialist Arts1 Specialist

Spell Casting: the Wizard casts arcane spells. He may know as many spells as he likes, but he can only fill his memory with a certain amount at any given moment. The Wizard begins play knowing three spells of first level, and gains another two known per level. The spells gained at a given level must be of a level he can cast. At any time, a Wizard may add a scroll to his spellbook (preventing it from being used as a scroll) or spend one hour copying a spell into his spellbook, providing it is a spell he is able to learn.

Any time he is not under pressure, the Wizard can sit down and memorise spells, preparing them from his spellbook. Each spell requires a number of minutes of concentration equal to its spell level, and fills a spell slot of the relevant level. When a spell is memorised, he may cast it at will. If a spell requires or allows a saving throw, the Save DC is 10 + half his level + his Intelligence Bonus.

To begin with, the Wizard only has one spell slot, and he slowly gains more, to a maximum of twelve (or sixteen for specialists) at level twenty. However, he gains a number of bonus spell slots, with the combined level equalling his Intelligence Bonus. As such, a first level Wizard with an Intelligence of 16 (+3 Bonus) would be able to prepare three extra spells of first level, but a third level Wizard with 16 Intelligence would be able to prepare the same bonus spells, or instead one first level and one second level spell.

Specialisation (Su): at first level, the Wizard may elect to Specialise. Specialising carries a drawback in that certain types of spell are completely blocked off, unable to be cast, but the benefits are many. If a Wizard specialises, he selects one of the Schools of Magic: Abjuration, Conjuration, Divination, Enchantment, Evocation, Illusion, Necromancy, and Transmutation. That is his specialist school, and for that he learns one additional spell per level of that school. Additionally, at level two, and every six levels beyond that, he gains an extra spell slot that may hold a spell of any level in his Specialist School.

Finally, he gains a number of abilities as he gains levels – Specialist Arts.

The downside is that you must select two other Schools. They are banned to you, and you are unable to learn, memorise or cast spells from those Schools. You cannot even cast them from scrolls, wands or staves without using the Use Magic Device skill.

If a Wizard chooses not to Specialise, he is a Generalist. He does not gain the extra spells known, nor the spell slots, but does not have to ban any schools. Additionally, although he is not a Specialist, he does gain something at the levels where he would normally gain Specialist Arts.

Familiar (Su): the Wizard is able to summon a familiar. This is a ritual that requires one hour of uninterrupted concentration and 10 GP worth of ingredients. The animal then reaches the Wizard and forms a bond with him. The Wizard may at any time use a Full Round Action to dismiss the familiar, severing the link and releasing it without harm. If the familiar is slain, the Wizard is Dazed for one round from the recoil. He may summon a new one the next time the sun rises.

The familiar can be any Tiny Animal or Vermin, providing it is a single creature and not a Swarm. From that point on, it can use the Wizard's Base Attack Bonus and Base Saving Throw Bonuses if they are better than its own, and it has half as many maximum hit points as the Wizard (unless it normally has more). It also benefits from all the skills the Wizard possesses, and provides him with a +3 Bonus on any one skill in which the normal animal normally has one or more ranks or a Racial Bonus.

Finally, any time the Wizard casts a spell on himself, he can choose for it to also affect his familiar if he wishes.

Arcane Crafting (Su): beginning at second level, the Wizard is able to channel magic into crafting more grandiose devices. He may enhance weapons, armour, shields, jewellery, clothing and similar devices with magical ability. Doing so requires having the base item in question and casting the required spells for the recipe. It also requires a specific amount of materials be used (Minor Magic Items: 2,000 GP, Moderate Items: 8,000 GP, Major Items: 32,000 GP), often also requiring a specific planar currency for more powerful things. Also, the enchanting process requires a lot of concentration with brief periods of spellcasting – each day of crafting requires twelve uninterrupted hours, meaning you're unlikely to get much else done that day. A Minor item requires four days of crafting, a Moderate item requires sixteen days, and a Major Item requires sixty four days (so a bit more than two months).

Lesser Specialist Arts (Su): at level four, the Wizard gains the first of the arts for their School of Specialisation.
-Abjuration: whenever the Abjurer casts an Abjuration spell, he gains Energy Resistance equal to his level against one energy type until the start of his next turn.
-Conjuration: whenever the Conjurer casts a Conjuration spell, he may either Teleport up to 30 feet away as part of the casting or, when summoning a creature, grant the creature Temporary HP equal to his level.
-Divination: when the Diviner casts a Divination spell to gain information about a creature, he is also prepared for any imminent actions taken by the target: until the beginning of his next turn, he gains a bonus to Armour Class and Saving Throws against that target equal to his Intelligence Bonus.
-Enchantment: whenever somebody successfully saves against an Enchantment cast by the Enchanter, they take a penalty on Will Saves equal to the Enchanter's Intelligence Bonus until the end of his next turn.
-Evocation: whenever the Evoker casts an Evocation spell that generates a Line or Bolt, he may “bounce” the effect off surfaces it hits, either rebounding straight back or with the angle of incidence equalling the angle of refraction. If it passes through someone's area twice, they are hit twice. When casting an Evocation that generates a Cone or Burst, if the area is too small to hold the spell effect, it “squeezes” out further – every square it would normally affect but cannot due to walls or other obstructions is added to an adjacent square to the edge of the blast.
-Illusion: whenever the Illusionist casts an Illusion that is only partly real, the amount of “realness” improves by twenty percent (such as going from 40% real to 60% real).
-Necromancy: whenever the Necromancer casts a Necromancy spell that damages someone, or one of his summoned or created Undead damages someone, he regains lost hit points equal to his level.
-Transmutation: whenever the Transmuter casts a Transmutation spell on himself, he gains Damage Reduction 5/- and Temporary Hit Points equal to his level, both for the duration of the effect.
-Generalisation: the Generalist Wizard may use an Immediate Action to apply any of his own [Meta-Magic] Feats to a spell cast by anyone else within 30 feet. The spell must be valid for that Feat, and it must be a low enough level to be affected as normal.

Vatic Gaze (Su): starting at level six, the Wizard constantly sees and understands magic. He has a constant Detect Magic effect running, even if he has banned Divination, and if he focuses on a magic item for a full minute, he can attempt to Identify it.

Accomplished Specialist Arts (Sp): at level eight, the Wizard's skill in his School of Specialision grants him another art.
-Abjuration: a number of times per day equal to his Intelligence Bonus, the Abjurer may use an Immediate Action to surround himself with a ward, granting him Spell Resistance equal to his level + 11 until the beginning of his next turn.
-Conjuration: a number of times per day equal to his Intelligence Bonus, the Conjurer may use an Immediate Action to Teleport up to 30 feet away. If this removes him from the range or area of effect of an attack, he is unaffected.
-Divination: a number of times per day equal to his Intelligence Bonus, the Diviner may use a Swift Action to gain insight into an incoming attack. The first attack against him until the start of his next turn suffers a penalty to the Attack roll or Save DC equal to his Intelligence Bonus.
-Enchantment: a number of times per day equal to his Intelligence Bonus, the Enchanter may use an Immediate Action to attempt to sway the mind of an attacker. If the attacker is not immune to [Mind-Affecting] effects, they are unable to target him on that turn.
-Evocation: a number of times per day equal to his Intelligence Bonus, the Evoker can use an Immediate Action to disrupt the actions of another. He makes a Ranged Touch Attack out to Close Range (25' plus 5' per 2 levels), and if it hits, the target suffers untyped damage equal to his hit dice and suffers a penalty equal to his Intelligence Bonus on any rolls made as part of that action, as well as on any Save DC for their effects.
-Illusion: a number of times per day equal to his Intelligence Bonus, the Illusionist can instantly create a single Mirror Image, lasting until it is hit or until the beginning of his next turn. Any incoming attacks that hit him have a 50% chance of merely hitting the Image instead, destroying it.
-Necromancy: a number of times per day equal to his Intelligence Bonus, the Necromancer can use an Immediate Action to divert an incoming targeted attack or effect to an adjacent controlled Undead creature. The attack or effect is resolved against the Undead instead of him.
-Transmutation: a number of times per day equal to his Intelligence Bonus, the Transmuter may use an Immediate Action to change his Type or gain a Subtype until the beginning of his next turn, such as becoming an Ooze to negate a Sneak Attack or gaining the [Cold] Subtype to be immune to a Cone of Cold.
-Generalisation: a number of times per day equal to his Intelligence Bonus, the Generalist may use an Immediate Action to weaken someone else's spell. If the caster is within Close Range (25' + 5' per 2 levels), he may reduce the Caster Level or Save DC by an amount equal to his Intelligence Bonus, or halve the Range, Area of Effect, Damage or Duration.

Named Spell: at level ten, the Wizard develops the first of his own unique spells. From this point on, he may research others, however unlike the one gained at tenth level, they require a lot of time – twelve hours per day for one month per Spell Level. He gains an extra Spell Slot which can only be used to memorise one of his Named Spells. At level eighteen, he instantly develops another Named Spell and gains another Named Spell Slot.

A Named Spell is typically unique to that caster. If he is a Specialist, it is always from his Specialist School. He can choose a spell of at least one level lower, from any other School (even a Banned one) and convert it to his own, given some justification, or could in some way increase the power of a lower level Spell – a Necromancer might take a second-level spell and add the condition that anything slain rises as a Skeleton under his control, and call that a fifth-level spell, for instance, or a third level spell that usually only affects one target might be changed to affect one target per level as a fifth-level version. Entirely new spells can also be invented, doing new things, but this requires discussion with Mister Cavern to decide what is appropriate, keeping in mind that some effects just aren't okay as things you can do every round at will.

Improved Specialist Arts (Sp): at level twelve, the Wizard develops a new, greater art in his School of Specialisation.
-Abjuration: whenever the Abjurer casts an Abjuration spell, he remains protected from magic for a number of rounds equal to the level of the spell he cast. For the duration, he has Spell Resistance of his level + 8.
-Conjuration: whenever the Conjurer casts a Conjuration spell, he may also surround himself in a conjured miasma for a number of rounds equal to the level of the spell he cast. For the duration, he has a 20% Miss Chance against all attacks from attacks other than those from adjacent foes.
-Divination: whenever the Diviner casts a Divination spell, he gains insight for a number of rounds equal to the level of the spell he cast. For the duration, he has a bonus on attack rolls equal to the Spell Level.
-Enchantment: whenever the Enchanter casts an Enchantment spell, others find him to be more personable. For a number of rounds equal to the Spell Level, he adds his Intelligence Bonus to Diplomacy checks, and anybody trying to attack him must first pass a Will Save against a [Mind-Affecting] effect, otherwise they are simply unable to and waste their action.
-Evocation: whenever the Evoker casts an Evocation spell, he becomes wreathed in energy for a number of rounds equal to the Spell Level. For the duration, he gains Energy Resistance equal to his level plus Intelligence Bonus against one type of energy – if the spell had an Energy descriptor, it must match that – and anyone who strikes him with a natural weapon or non-reach melee weapon suffers 1d6 damage of that type.
-Illusion: whenever the Illusionist casts an Illusion spell, a subtle magic covers him. Until the end of his next turn, he has the Hide in Plain Sight ability, and all of his spells are Stilled and Silenced.
-Necromancy: whenever the Necromancer casts a Necromancy spell, dread and unlife cling to him. For a number of rounds equal to the Spell Level, he gains Temporary Hit Points equal to his level (these do not stack) and may add his Intelligence Bonus to Intimidate checks.
-Transmutation: whenever the Transmuter casts a Transmutation spell, his form becomes less stable for a number of rounds equal to the Spell Level. For the duration, he has a 50% chance to negate any Critical Hit, reducing it to regular damage, and if the spell was one that changed his form and had a number of options, he may use a Swift Action to change the options.
-Generalisation: whenever somebody within Close Range (25' + 5' per 2 levels) casts a spell the Generalist knows but has not Prepared, the Generalist may use an Immediate Action to swap a spell out and instantly Prepare the spell that was cast. The Spell Slot must be of a high enough level.

Familial Link: at level fourteen, the Wizard may cast his prepared spells through his familiar. Although he is still required to spend the required actions, he can treat the familiar as the point of origin, allowing him to cast spells around corners (or from miles away if he trusts his creature to survive that far from him). Additionally, he is in constant Telepathic communication with his familiar, and can Scry on it at any time with a Full Round Action.

Greater Specialist Arts (Sp): at level sixteen, the Wizard develops yet another art that encapsulates his School of Specialisation.
-Abjuration: x
-Conjuration: x
-Divination: x
-Enchantment: x
-Evocation: x
-Illusion: x
-Necromancy: x
-Transmutation: x
-Generalisation: x

Contingency: at level nineteen, the Wizard learns the special universal spell Contingency. When this is prepared, he must select another spell he knows, and prepares it as a Contingency of that spell. He then specifies the circumstances in which it is automatically cast on his behalf – such as “Contingency: cast Freedom of Movement if grappled” or “Contingency: cast Greater Teleport if reduced below 10% hit points”. The spell will then cast itself when the conditions are met, emptying the contingency slot such that he needs to prepare it again.

Transcendent Specialist Arts (Sp): at level twenty, the Wizard is the master of his School of Specialisation, and quite possibly the best in the world. He learns the final art of his School.
-Abjuration: x
-Conjuration: x
-Divination: x
-Enchantment: x
-Evocation: x
-Illusion: x
-Necromancy: x
-Transmutation: x
-Generalisation: x
Last edited by Koumei on Tue Apr 28, 2015 12:39 am, edited 4 times in total.
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Post by coins »

What is this game based on?
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Post by Koumei »

It's basically D&D 3.5, except where it isn't. So it has bits of Gaming Den Tome, bits of "stuff Frank has mentioned being good and I agreed with him on these points and felt it's not too hard to add in".

Because the players aren't familiar with any version of D&D, I don't think it'll confuse them for life or anything, and then later one of the others will be running 5Ed, so they'll expect it to be different from this one.
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Post by maglag »

Who would want to play that rogue when they can play that wizard with at-will spellcasting they can change between every combat (while the rogue is stuck with less techniques he can't change), chump-change scrolls for even more spells, and a bunch of other free benefits?

Heck, that wizard even knows how to use rapiers and swords and short bows by default and everything.
Last edited by maglag on Wed Apr 22, 2015 2:27 pm, edited 1 time in total.
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Post by Chamomile »

The Wizard's spellslots are so tightly rationed that he is reasonably likely to run out of spells within the space of a single encounter, which means that the Rogue's ability to keep on doing tricks for as long as he likes is actually relevant. Not so much at lower levels, though. By level 7, the Wizard really wants extra 4th level spells but his INT bonus won't give him more than one of those, which means any encounter that lasts longer than two rounds will see him running dry on his best stuff, and a properly constructed encounter can easily last 3 rounds (yes, even with rocket launcher tag, use more than one opponent). At level 1, the Wizard has four spells, which means only very long encounters will run him out.
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Post by maglag »

1-You're making it sound like lower level spells are useless, but stuff like color spray/grease/haste/glitterdust/web never gets old.
2-Even if the above stops being true, at 7th level the wizard can use 7 scrolls per day that cost so little they may as well be free, so that's an extra 2 scrolls for 3 battles plus one extra for something else. At 16th level the wizard can go 4 spells per battle 4 times per day without actually spending a single spell slot.
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Post by Chamomile »

Color Spray goes from a SoD to a one-round crowd control spell as average enemy HD climbs, Haste is a buff spell best used on someone other than the Wizard which means the game is not actually worse off for the Wizard having ready access to it, Grease is a barely-useful crowd control spell mostly nullified by passing a DC 10 Balance check, Glitterdust is a debuff and not a SoD, and Web is crowd control that doesn't prevent enemies from fighting back with ranged weapons. It's trivially easy to imagine tricks that are more helpful than Web or Grease, although imagining is all we can do right now because by the time the Wizard's level 2 spells are his backups and not what he opens the encounter with, the Rogue has Amazing Techniques which are not a thing which has actually been written.

I'm not arguing about the scrolls. Those are bad and should probably be cut completely.
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Post by Koumei »

Okay...

1. Thanks for catching the Proficiencies: I did the copy-pasta routine, then changed things. And forgot to change Weapon Proficiencies.

2. Scribe Scroll is now gone.

3. Cham, note that spell slots don't empty when cast. It's "prepare a small number of spells, then cast them at will." However...

4. I actually did mention I'd be looking at examples of spells that would be acceptable, they don't just get to pick their favourites from 3.5 and roll with it.

5. That said, I'm open to the idea of changing things around, for instance letting the Rogue change their "Techs known" each day.
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Post by maglag »

Well, what are you aiming at with "acceptable"? Is color spray/sleep fine? I suppose permanent minion creation like animate dead is out, and even regular summons would get OP when you can cast them at will. Most illusions can get pretty crazy when you can use them at will as well, even a simple low-level spell like invisibility becomes kinda premimum when you can use it to make the whole party invisible at 3rd level. So the wizard spells should be limited to damage and debuffs, along with some buffs and utility. Even then depends if you're fine with the wizard making the whole party fly all the time at 5th level and so on.

Also yes, the rogue should have a way to retrain his techniques, in particular when he has to split them up between combat ones, and trap ones that can only be used off-combat.
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Post by Koumei »

Damaging effects.
Personal buffs.
Stuff like Fly (which everyone should be doing at some point) and regular Invisibility (which breaks when you attack or cast a spell).
Summoning that can only be "one at a time".
Debuffs that you can throw about on all enemies with no problem.
Short duration save-or-lose things: I'll give an example below.

Not acceptable would be "any permanent effects" and things like the ____ Image spells that let you completely shape the battlefield and create complex stuff. Similarly, the summoning spells that let you flip through books are out, but "Pick an elemental of X strength, it hangs around for a minute or until killed or until you summon a new one" is fine. You just constantly have a pet monster (until someone kills you). Dominate effects with a duration longer than one round are out as well, though Charming someone out of combat for an hour or so isn't much of a problem.

The example I promised:

Colour Spray
Level 1 Illusion [Pattern]
Standard Action, 15' Cone, Will Negates, SR: Yes, Duration: 1d4 (special)
Targets that fail the save suffer effects based on their hit dice:
>= your level: Blind 1 round
Half your level or more, less than your level: Dazed 1 round, Blind for the duration
Under half your level: Comatose 1 round, Dazed for the duration

So at level 1 when the party gets attacked by 3 goblin warriors, if they're all in tight formation, then they get Blinded for a round. At level 2 when they get attacked by 6 goblin warriors, then any caught in the casting will spend a round Dazed, and that might or might not be long enough for the team to mop them all up. Then for 0-3 more rounds they're blind. At level 3 when fighting 9 goblin warriors, then it gets pretty awesome, but on the other hand if they're fighting an Ankheg then it's just Blind for one round.
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Post by AndreiChekov »

start as a blatant rip-off of Storm of Zehir,
I thoroughly aprove of this. I recently MCd a game where we played Dragon Age Origins, the 3.5 edition.
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Post by Koumei »

Well the Wizard is as complete as it needs to be, given the game is unlikely to even hit tenth level, let alone sixteenth which is the point where I'd have to write something new.

So here are the First Level Spells I think will be okay:
Animate Rope (Transmutation)
Bigby's Tripping Hand (Evocation)
Blade of Blood (Necromancy)
Burning Hands (Evocation), sets people on fire
Burning Rage (Transmutation)
Cause Fear (Necromancy)
Charm Person (Enchantment), relatively short duration
Chill Touch (Necromancy)
Colour Spray (Illusion), see above post
Comprehend Languages (Divination)
Dawnburst (Evocation)
Detection (Divination)
Disguise Self (Illusion)
Distract Assailant (Enchantment)
Endure Elements (Abjuration)
Enhanced Vision (Transmutation), Darkvision and Low-Light Vision
Enlarge Person (Transmutation)
Expeditious Retreat (Transmutation)
Fist of Stone (Transmutation)
Grease (Conjuration)
Guided Shot (Divination)
Hold Portal (Abjuration)
Hypnotism (Enchantment)
Identify (Divination)
Jet of Steam (Conjuration)
Karmic Aura (Abjuration)
Lesser Spiderform (Transmutation)
Mage Armour (Abjuration), yes Abjuration, it protects you
Magic Missile (Evocation)
Magic Weapon (Transmutation)
Master's Touch (Divination)
Mount (Conjuration)
Night Shield (Abjuration)
Obscuring Mist (Conjuration)
Power Word: Fatigue (Enchantment)
Protection From Alignment (Abjuration)
Ray of Enfeeblement (Necromancy)
Rot of Ages (Necromancy)
Shield (Abjuration)
Shocking Grasp (Evocation)
Summon Monster I (Conjuration), spell ends if you re-cast it
Summon Undead I (Necromancy), spell ends if you re-cast it
True Strike (Divination)
Whelm (Enchantment)
Also I decided Hit Points will be (half the hit die of what it usually is) plus Con mod, x4 at first level (like skill points). That way you can have "yet to be hero" people who totally are weaker than that. Depending on the size of your hit die and Con mod, it won't take very long for that to no longer be very noteworthy: a level 1 Barbarian with 14 Con has 32 HP instead of 14. More than double, as intended. At level 5 he has 64 HP instead of 36, and it's a bit less than double - the difference is a pair of "d6 per level" spells. At level 10 he has 104 instead of 76 and the difference is *slightly* more than a "d6 per level" effect, or indeed less than a single Empowered one of those.

No, monsters and "dudes with NPC classes" don't get this benefit, they're "as seen in the MM" basically (the former) and simply get chainsawed in half as usual (the latter).
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Post by Koumei »

(For the Berserker "spare character" in case we have extra players.)

THE BERSERKER
“You are in danger of making me angry. That will be a serious, permanent mistake.”

Berserking is an art, a form of warfare that requires training. Anyone can get angry, but a Berserker lets it take over, and launches into the rage, being one with their fury. Berserkers can come from any race, any civilisation, any background, but all of them find the anger at their core in their own way. Furthermore, no matter how in touch with nature they may or may not be, the spirits take an interest in berserkers. It is thought that the spirits of the Bear, Wolf and Badger are all keenly attuned to rage, and automatically flock to the Berserker to provide protection, guidance, and more anger.

Hit Points Per Level: 6 + Constitution Modifier (x4 at level 1)
BAB: Good
Saves: Good Fort
Skill Points Per Level: 4 + Intelligence Modifier (x4 at level 1)
Class Skills: Athletics, Craft, Handle Animal, Heal, Intimidate, Perception, Ride, Sense Motive, Survival

Weapon Proficiencies: Simple Weapons and Martial Weapons
Armour Proficiencies: Light Armour and Cloth Armour, Shields
LevelSpecialFuriesRage Limit
1Rage, Frenzied Strike24
2Combat Speed, Fast Healing35
3Scent, Uncanny Dodge45
4Battle Hardened56
5Greater Rage, See Spirits76
6Speak With Spirits87
7Rapid Tracking97
8Sidestep Hazards108
9Frenzied Rage128
10Evasion139
11Commune With Spirits149
12Terrify Spirits1510
13Indomitable Rage1710
14Great Life1811
15Deathless Rage1911
16Watched by the Spirits2012
17Supreme Rage2212
18Ruinous Touch2313
19Bottled Fury2413
20Living Rage2514

Rage (Ex): the Berserker is always ready to explode into a rage. Any time he deals damage to a valid target or receives damage from a valid target, he gains one Rage Point, up to his Limit. Taking damage from the same target multiple times in one round only awards one Rage Point, similarly damaging the same target multiple times in one turn. Taking damage from different targets, damaging different targets, or damaging a target out of turn all grant Rage Points separately. If he was not already in a Rage, this puts him into a Rage. When in a Rage, he gains a +2 Morale Bonus on Attack and Damage rolls, suffers a -2 Penalty to Armour Class, gains Damage Reduction equal to half his level (round down) plus 2, overcome by nothing, and can use his Furies. The Rage ends if he goes for three rounds without damaging or being damaged by a valid target, at which point he loses all of his Rage Points.

A valid target is anything that threatens his square and is enough of a threat that its death would grant experience.

Furies: as the Berserker gains levels, he learns a number of Furies. These are special powers that can only be used when in a Rage and that cost Rage Points to use. Other than this, there is no limit to their use. The individual descriptions specify whether they are Extraordinary or Supernatural, and how many Rage Points they cost to use. At every level, along with learning new Furies he may trade one known one out, forgetting it and letting a new one enter his brain. He may even trade lesser Furies out for stronger ones in this way, if he doesn't mind having all of his Furies cost more Rage Points. Frenzied Strike cannot be traded out in this way.

Frenzied Strike (Ex): all Berserkers have access to the most basic Fury, Frenzied Strike: when making an attack, the Berserker may spend one Rage Point to deal an extra 1d6 points of damage per 2 levels (round up). This may be spent on multiple attacks in a round. This does not take up one of the required Furies for his level.

Combat Speed (Ex): starting at level 2, Berserkers move faster when angry. When in a Rage, the Berserker gains a +5 foot bonus to his Speed. Every 2 levels beyond that, his speed in a Rage increases by another 5 feet.

Fast Healing (Ex): starting at level two, the Berserker has Fast Healing but only when not in a Rage. He regains one Hit Point per round per two levels.

Scent (Ex): at third level, the Berserker gains the Scent quality, and can locate Invisible foes by smell within 60 feet. This does not negate the Miss Chance, but he needn't guess which square they inhabit. He also gains a +6 Bonus to track creatures by smell.

Uncanny Dodge (Ex): the third-level Berserker is never denied his Dexterity Bonus to Armour Class.

Battle Hardened (Ex): at level four, the Berserker is a bit mental. When in a Rage, he may use his Fortitude Save in place of Will Saves, and is immune to the Confusion condition.

Greater Rage (Ex): at level five, the Berserker gains a better Rage. A Greater one, even. This increases the bonus on attack and damage to plus four, and from this point on he may use Greater Furies. This is still a Rage, so all previous benefits that apply "during a Rage" still work.

See Spirits (Su): at level five, the Berserker is awake to the spirit world and can just flat-out see Incorporeal and Ethereal creatures.

Speak With Spirits (Su): at level six, the Berserker can also hear Incorporeal and Ethereal creatures even when they're not trying to be heard, and can speak to them in kind. More importantly, he may cast Augury, Speak With Animals and Speak With Dead once each per day.

Rapid Tracking (Ex): at level seven, the Berserker can move at his regular speed while tracking his prey, without penalty.

Sidestep Hazards (Ex): at level eight, the Berserker can leap clear of danger just by being focused on killing. When in a Rage, he can use his Fortitude Save in place of his Reflex Save, and is never Entangled or Paralysed.

Frenzied Rage (Ex): at level nine, the Berserker's Rage becomes particularly frenzied. When using the Power Attack option in his Rage, he deals three extra damage per -1 to the attack roll, and he can now select Frenzied Furies.

Evasion (Ex): at level ten the Berserker gains Evasion. Any time he succeeds at a Reflex Save for half damage, he instead suffers no damage.

Commune With Spirits (Su): once per day, the eleventh-level Berserker can speak with a multitude of spirits, gaining the effects of a Communion spell. If, as part of casting this, he shares a great feast of hunted and gathered food, with his allies and the nearby spirits, it also creates a Heroes' Feast effect for him and his party.

Terrify Spirits (Su): at level twelve, the Berserker can bully ghosts and other spirits. With a Standard Action at will, he may howl into the ether, making an Intimidate check. All Incorporeal and Ethereal creatures must beat the check with a Modified Level Check (level + Charisma) or Panic for 3d6 rounds.

Indomitable Rage (Ex): the Rage of the thirteenth-level Berserker is particularly fierce and unrelenting. He can now learn Indomitable Furies, and is immune to Ability Damage and Drain during his Rage.

Great Life (Ex): starting at level fourteen, the Berserker is immune to [Death] effects and level drain, whether he is raging or not.

Deathless Rage (Su): when the fifteenth-level Berserker is in a Rage, he is practically immune to dying at all: he continues to fight when in negative hit points, and will only collapse and die when he has taken his maximum hit points in the negatives.

Watched by the Spirits (Su): at level sixteen, the spirits protect the Berserker to some extent. He constantly benefits from a Foresight effect.

Supreme Rage (Ex): the Rage of the seventeenth-level Berserker is supreme. He may now learn Supreme Furies, and any time he slays an opponent with a melee attack during a Rage, he may instantly make a 5' step and make another attack (at the same attack bonus) against another opponent if he wishes.

Ruinous Touch (Su): while in a Rage, the eighteenth-level Berserker ignores all Hardness, Damage Reduction, Regeneration and Immunity to Critical Hits, with all of his attacks.

Bottled Fury (Ex): once per day, the nineteenth-level Berserker may unleash all that pent-up aggression and instantly fill his Rage Points to the maximum, using just a Swift Action.

Living Rage (Ex): at level twenty, the Berserker is in a state of perfect understanding. When in a Rage, he still benefits from his Fast Healing. When not in a Rage, he still has all benefits of a Rage, and no longer loses his Rage Points when he calms down.

Standard Furies:
Rending Badger Fangs (Su)
1 Rage Point
You channel the fury of an angry animal, and grow actual fangs that can bite through bone.
With a Swift Action, you grow a Bite Attack that can be used as a Primary or Secondary Natural Weapon, and deals 1d6 + Strength in Piercing damage for a Medium creature. It has a Critical value of 20/x3 and also deals 2 points of Strength Damage on a Critical Hit. This lasts for the duration of the Rage.

Hide of Iron (Ex)
1 or 2 Rage Points
Your fury hardens your skin, causing blades to bounce off harmlessly.
With a Free Action, you double your Damage Reduction and gain Immunity to Critical Hits, along with a +4 Natural Armour Bonus. This lasts until the start of your next turn. For 2 Rage Points, this can be activated as an Immediate Action, taking effect before an incoming attack is resolved.

Weather the Storm (Ex)
1 or 2 Rage Points
You ignore the fiercest weather and dangerous hazards littered around the battlefield. It is of no concern to someone as angry as you are.
With a Free Action, you gain Energy Resistance equal to five times your level against Fire, Cold and Electricity damage. This lasts until the start of your next turn. For 2 Rage Points, this can be activated as an Immediate Action, taking effect before an incoming attack is resolved.

Leap at the Moon (Su)
1 Rage Point
Your anger propels you through the air, so even flying foes have no protection.
With a Swift Action, you gain a Fly Speed until the end of your turn. This equals double your land speed (including Combat Speed) and has Perfect manoeuvrability.

Wounding Strike (Ex)
1 Rage Point
Your anger helps you hit someone in a way that leaves permanent wounds.
This can be activated to augment a melee attack: it deals Vile damage, which cannot be healed by normal means, and forces the target to attempt a Fortitude Save (Strength-based) or be Staggered for one round.

Storm Chaser (Ex)
1 Rage Point
Nothing can escape your wrath. You move exceptionally fast.
With a Swift Action, you may move up to double your normal Movement Speed, including Combat Speed and other bonuses. This also allows you to move across surfaces that could not hold your weight, such as water, and along walls, as long as you end this movement on a flat surface that can hold your weight.

Frenzied Lunge (Ex)
1, 2 or 3 Rage Points
You lash out faster than most people can blink.
With a Swift Action, you make a single attack. For two Rage Points, you may do so with an Immediate Action. For three Rage Points, you may make a Full Attack with a Swift Action.

Terrifying Rage (Ex)
1 Rage Point
With a blood-chilling howl, you inspire fear in those who dared make you angry.
With a Swift Action, you may attempt to Demoralise all foes within 30 feet. This can be used each turn to stack the fear from Shaken to Frightened to Panicked to Comatose.

Boiling Blood (Su)
1 or 2 Rage Points
People hitting you find that your rage is literally burning, as your blood sears their flesh.
With an Immediate Action in response to a melee attack that successfully deals damage to you, you splash your blood onto the attacker, dealing an amount of Fire damage equal to your level plus your Constitution Bonus plus 1d10. This automatically hits the attacker if they are adjacent to you, otherwise they are allowed a Reflex Save (Constitution-based) for half. Other creatures adjacent to you are also hit, but allowed a Reflex Save for half. For two Rage Points, the effect remains in place until your next turn, activating again every time you are hit until then with no further cost.
Count Arioch the 28th wrote:There is NOTHING better than lesbians. Lesbians make everything better.
Koumei
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Joined: Fri Mar 07, 2008 7:54 pm
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Post by Koumei »

Here's the Necromancer - the class used for the elf in the group. If there are problems with some of the abilities, this is a good chance to catch them before it reaches that point in-game.

THE NECROMANCER
“Death comes for all... some faster than others.”

People can study Necromancy, almost as a magical science dealing with a magical school related to the manipulation of life forces. That is an option. But for others, there is more power to be found in directly channelling soul energy, grabbing and manipulating the miasmic force known as Essentia. That is the Necromancer - clad in death, cold and fear, a master of shaping undead energy.
Curses were added to fill levels and give some other options that are still thematic to necromancers. A lot of people think "curses" when they think "Necromancer", indeed many think "Diablo 2" when they think "Necromancer". Why the Uttercold stuff? Two reasons. One, to fill levels. Two, to give them some more options for actually spending an action to do a thing.
Hit Points Per Level: 2 + Constitution Modifier (x4 at level 1)
BAB: Poor
Saves: Fort and Will
Skill Points Per Level: 2 + Intelligence Modifier (x4 at level 1)
Class Skills: Alchemy, Craft, Heal, Intimidate, Lore, Ride, Search, Stealth, Survival

Weapon Proficiencies: Simple Weapons
Armour Proficiencies: Cloth Armour
LevelClass FeaturesTotal EssentiaMaximum
1Charnel Touch, Create Undead21
2Bone Armour32
3Lesser Curses42
4Create Eerie Undead63
5Deathly Pallor, Revive Corpse73
6Uttercold Initiate83
7Create Creepy Undead104
8Greater Curses114
9Desecration124
10Create Monstrous Undead144
11Uttercold Adept155
12Dark Curses165
13Create Spooky Undead185
14Sacrificial Minions195
15Magic Jar205
16Create Terrifying Undead226
17Dire Curses236
18Uttercold Master246
19Create Unique Undead266
20Lichdom276

Charnel Touch (Su): one of the most basic abilities of the Necromancer is the Charnel Touch: as long as at least one Essentia is bound to it, he has a Melee Touch Attack that deals 1d8 Negative Energy damage per 2 levels (round up) to living creatures, and heals Undead for an equal amount. A Will Save (Charisma-based) halves the damage. Additional points of Essentia can be bound to this to do the following:
  • Arcing: it is resolved as a Ranged Touch Attack, out to 60 feet. If Burst is also applied, then a 10' radius Burst can be formed anywhere within 60 feet.
  • Burst: it automatically hits all within 10 feet, optionally including the Necromancer if he so wishes (such as if he is Undead). A Will Save still halves the damage.
  • Entropic: the damage/healing increases to 1d6 per level.
  • Paralitic: creatures damaged by the effect that fail the Will Save must then pass a Fort Save or be Paralysed for 3 rounds (2 Essentia)
  • Terrifying: creatures damaged by the effect that fail the Will Save are Frightened for 1 minute (2 Essentia).
  • Draining: creatures damaged by the effect that fail the Will Save suffer 1 Negative Level that lasts for 1 hour. Creatures healed by the effect benefit from Heroism for one minute.
Create Undead (Su): the other basic ability is the creation of undead. With a ritual lasting ten minutes per hit die, he may animate the dead, creating a Skeleton or Zombie. The final hit dice must be no more than his level, and it must be Medium or smaller. He may control two Undead at a time if one Essentia is bound to the ability. Every additional Essentia bound doubles the amount, so two Essentia allows for four undead, and six allows for sixty four. If he un-binds the Essentia, any Undead in excess of the new limit just collapse and “die”.

Essentia: as the Necromancer gains levels, he gains more and more power, dark soul energy filtered through the negative energy plane and given an almost tangible form. Scholars argue as to the colour of Essentia, with most claiming it is blue that just “looks” black, but it hardly matters. Most abilities the Necromancer uses require Essentia be bound to them. As he gains levels, he becomes able to bind more Essentia to the same abilities, making them more powerful, and unlocks new abilities as well. Un-binding any amount of Essentia is a Free Action, but binding it requires a Full Round Action.

Bone Armour (Sp): starting at second level, the Necromancer can harden Essentia into ghostly bones that protect him. With one Essentia bound, he gains an Armour Bonus of four, plus one per three levels (round up). This applies against Incorporeal Touch Attacks. It also grants Cold Resistance and Damage Reduction, overcome by Bludgeoning weapons, equal to the Armour Bonus. Additional points of Essentia can also be bound to do any of the following:
  • Miasma: a horrible mist grants you Concealment against attacks made from beyond 5 feet away, and adjacent foes must pass a Fort Save (Charisma-based) or be Sickened for one round.
  • Bone Spikes: wicked spikes grow out, and foes who hit you with natural or non-reach melee weapons suffer Magical Piercing damage equal to the Armour Bonus, plus 1d6.
  • Terrifying: any foe who hits you must pass a Will Save (Charisma-based) or Cower for one round.
  • Otherworldly Whispers: adjacent foes must, at the start of their turn, attempt a Will Save (Charisma-based) or be Dazed for one round. (2 Essentia)
  • Ghostly Wings: shadowy tendrils grant you a Fly Speed of 60 feet (Average). (2 Essentia)
Lesser Curses (Sp): at level three, the Necromancer gains the ability to unleash Curses upon his foes. He gains access to all Lesser Curses, but he must invest Essentia in a given Curse in order to use it. Any Save DC is Charisma-based. The Curses available are:
  • Curse of Darkness: the target must pass a Fortitude Save or be Blind for 1 minute.
  • Curse of Lethargy: the target must pass a Fortitude Save or be Fatigued until rested.
  • Curse of the Stolen Voice: the target must pass a Will Save or be Silenced for 1 hour, during which time you may impersonate their voice perfectly.
A Curse is “cast” with a Standard Action, and affects a single target within Close Range (25 feet plus 5 feet per 2 levels). Additional Essentia may be invested, each one either doubling the Range, doubling the Duration (does not affect Curse of Lethargy) or, for two extra Essentia, affecting all targets in a 15 foot radius Burst. Applying relevant Meta-Magic feats negates the need to invest the extra Essentia, but you must have a high enough Maximum to be able to.

Create Eerie Undead (Su): starting at level four, the Necromancer can create more impressive Undead. He may create Large Skeletons and Zombies, each one counting as two regular ones, and may turn Medium corpses of vaguely humanoid shape into Ghouls with hit dice equal to his own, each counting as two regular Zombies for the purpose of how many he can control.

Deathly Pallor (Ex): at level five, the Necromancer appears to be less alive than he once was. His skin takes on a cold, pale, waxy appearance, and his eyes become sunken and somehow lifeless. He gains a +1 Natural Armour Bonus to Armour Class, which increases by +1 for every additional 5 levels he attains, and has a chance to negate the effects of a Critical Hit equal to 5% per level.

Revive Corpse (Sp): the fifth-level Necromancer has a quick way to reanimate Undead that have collapsed. With just a Full Round Action, he can pump animating negative energy into an adjacent Undead that has been destroyed, bringing it back at a tenth of its maximum hit points. It must have been under his control, and he cannot have already created more Undead to fill its place in his legion. This ability requires one point of Essentia be allocated to it. Additional Essentia can be allocated to bring Undead back at one quarter (+1) or one half (+2) of their maximum hit points, or to increase the range to Close (+1) or Medium (+2).

Uttercold Initiate (Sp): at level six, the Necromancer learns the first knowledge of Uttercold magic – spells that combine both cold and negative energy. Allocating a single point of Essentia allows him to use a Standard Action at will to unleash a 20' Cone of Uttercold or a Medium Range Ray of Uttercold. The former automatically hits, with a Fortitude Save for half damage (Charisma-based), whereas the latter requires a Ranged Touch Attack to hit, but allows no save. Either way, it deals 1d6 damage per 2 levels, half of which is Cold and half of which is Negative Energy, healing Undead. Allocating additional Essentia can either increase the damage to 1d6 per level (+1) or animate those slain as basic Zombies (+3) providing there is space in your control pool. Meta-Magic Feats may be applied to these: you cannot apply them if the Meta-Level plus the initial investment of Essentia is greater than the Maximum (for instance, investing two Essentia for effects that deal 1d6 per level could be Empowered by Powerful Spell, but only if the Maximum is 4 or more).

Create Creepy Undead (Su): at level seven, the Necromancer becomes able to create even better Undead, although each option here counts as four basic Undead for the purpose of control pools. He may create a Huge Skeleton or Zombie, a Ghast or Wight or Deathlock or Vampire Spawn (with hit dice equal to his level), or an Allip or Shadow (with hit dice equal to half his level). At this point, any creature of the Dragon type turned into a Skeleton or Zombie uses the relevant template from Draconomicon.

Greater Curses (Sp): at level eight, the Necromancer gains the ability to unleash curses that are greater than the previous ones. As before, any given curse must have one Essentia bound to it in order to use, and they have the same range and enhancement options as before. The new curses are:
  • Curse of Madness: the target must pass a Will Save or be Confused for 1 hour per level
  • Curse of Typhus: the target must pass a Fort Save or be Nauseated for 5 rounds
  • Curse of Wasting: the target must pass a Fort Save or suffer one Negative Level per round for one round per two levels. These Temporary Negative Levels only last for one hour.
Desecration (Su): at level nine, the Necromancer emanates a constant 30 foot radius of Desecration. His very existence is considered a shrine to an evil deity for the purpose of this effect.

Create Monstrous Undead (Su): at level ten, the Necromancer becomes able to create truly horrifying Undead, although each option here counts as eight basic Undead for the purpose of control pools. He may create a Wraith, Spectre, Voidwraith, Mummy, Bleakborn, or Entomber. Any creature created in this way has hit dice equal to his level.

Uttercold Adept (Sp): at level eleven, the Necromancer unlocks the next arts of Uttercold magic. All Uttercold powers are considered the same power for the purpose of allocating Essentia. It may now be unleashes as a 20' radius Burst out to Long Range, or a 5' Wide Line that has a Long Range, or as a Wall effect within Medium Range, up to 15' tall and 5' long per two levels. A wall lasts for one round per level or until another is created. It deals full damage to those stepping through, and half (negated with a Fortitude Save) to anyone within ten feet. The others do full damage, or half on a successful Reflex Save.

Dark Curses (Sp): at level twelve, more curses are available, working the same as previous ones for all intents and purposes. The new curses are:
  • Curse of Petrification: if the target fails a Fortitude Save, they are Paralysed for one round per level, after which they are allowed one more save attempt, failure causing permanent Petrification.
  • Curse of Fatality: if the target fails a Fortitude Save, they begin Dying. Although their hit points remain the same, they are rendered Helpless and will die after ten rounds unless the Necromancer is slain or elects to end the effect.
  • Curse of Crippling: if the target fails a Fortitude Save, they immediately suffer 1d6 Ability Damage to each ability score, and then another 1 point to each score each round for one round per two levels.
Create Spooky Undead (Su): at level thirteen, the Necromancer becomes able to create even more horrifying Undead, although each option here counts as sixteen basic Undead for the purpose of control pools. He may create a Gargantuan Zombie or Skeleton, or a Hulking Corpse, Blaspheme, Slaughterwight, Greater Shadow, Plague Spewer or Salt Mummy. It has hit dice equal to his level.

Sacrificial Minions (Su): beginning at level four, the Necromancer may use an Immediate Action to draw an adjacent Undead creation into harm's way. He tugs a strand of Essentia, and an attack made against him is instead resolved against one of his created Undead in an adjacent square.

Magic Jar (Sp): starting at level fifteen, the Necromancer may allocate one Essentia to being able to cast Magic Jar at will.

Create Terrifying Undead (Su): at level sixteen, the Necromancer becomes able to create nightmarish Undead, although each option here counts as a full thirty two basic Undead for the purpose of control pools. He may create a Dread Wraith, Wheep, Entropic Reaper, Crimson Death, Abyssal Ghoul, or Charnel Hound, with hit dice equal to his level.

Dire Curses (Sp): at level seventeen, the Necromancer gains access to the worst kinds of curses – the kind with more dire effects than “making someone feel bad until you kill them”. The new curses unlocked are:
  • Curse of Soul Theft: if the target fails a Will Save, their soul is extracted, leaving their body in a corpselike state where it will soon die. The Necromancer may do as he pleases with the soul.
  • Curse of Blight: instead of a target, this affects an area with a one mile radius, causing all land to be Desecrated and Unhallowed, all water Befoulled and all plants Diminished. All Animals with 6 hit dice or fewer automatically contract Pox, and all Animals with only a partial hit die are slain instantly. Aside from the Pox and deaths, the effects last for one full lunar cycle.
  • Curse of Mass Hysteria: up to one target per level must pass a Will Save or be rendered permanently Insane.
  • Curse of Evil Weather: instead of a target, this affects an area with a one mile radius until the next sunrise, afflicting it with any form of Evil Weather from the Book of Vile Darkness.
Uttercold Master (Sp): at level eighteen, the final arts of Uttercold magic are granted to the Necromancer. If he has Essentia bound, he gains the ability to cast it as a Cloud (30 foot radius) that lingers for one round per level, or cause it to rain from the sky out to Medium Range. In the former case, anybody in the area suffers half damage each round (halved again on a successful Fortitude Save), and in the latter case, everyone in the area suffers regular damage, with a Reflex Save for half.

Create Unique Undead (Su): at level nineteen, the Necromancer is practically a master of his art, and may create specific unique Undead. Each one is considered sixty four regular undead, and if he revokes the Essentia, they are allowed a Will Save: if they succeed, then instead of being destroyed they are just permanently released from his control and instantly gain their own free will to do as they please in the world – possibly developing sudden new goals that are not related to serving the Necromancer. If they fail, they are destroyed as normal. Typically, creations of this sort are Vampires, Mummy Lords, Ghosts or Swordwraiths.

Lichdom (Ex): at level twenty, the Necromancer learns the secrets to becoming a Lich and may just do so if he happens to have twelve hours spare. He may also create Liches, Dracoliches and similar creatures with his Create Unique Undead class feature.
Count Arioch the 28th wrote:There is NOTHING better than lesbians. Lesbians make everything better.
Mord
Knight-Baron
Posts: 565
Joined: Thu Apr 24, 2014 12:25 am

Post by Mord »

Interesting stuff... To what extent, if any, were you drawing inspiration from this thread?
Koumei
Serious Badass
Posts: 13871
Joined: Fri Mar 07, 2008 7:54 pm
Location: South Ausfailia

Post by Koumei »

Almost completely.
Count Arioch the 28th wrote:There is NOTHING better than lesbians. Lesbians make everything better.
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